Personally, I find reading all present-tense narrative unpleasant. It feels like reading a stage script instead of a novel. However, I don't know how common it is for new writers or readers, either one, and I may only be expressing a prejudice born of reading a lot of commercial fiction.
It could use a lot of editing for spelling & punctuation. I don't know what you are using to generate the letters in the "images", but something with like Word with its spelling & grammar checking may help when writing. I will say that Word is NOT perfect at either spelling or grammar, though.
Here's an example of past-tense (could) mixed with present-tense (punches):
"Before Aaron could blink Connor sucker punches him in the face causing Aaron to fall to the ground."
In all present-tense, it would say, "Before Aaron can blink". In past-tense, it would say "Before Aaron could blink Connor sucker punched him".
The last sentence in that same paragraph says:
As soon as Connor finished the sentence he was punched in the face, causing him to fly into a wall."
This is all past-tense narrative where most of the writing has been present-tense.
I see we're mostly only looking at the mechanics of writing, and not the story-telling itself. I suspect we'd need to read a lot more to say much about the story-telling part. Hope we're not completely missing what you really wanted feedback on.