lol, i haven't snapped back to anything. im still as pathetic as i've always been, and mentally im kinda losing myself. before i was saying those things because i had vodka influence me, in reality, im still stuck in that exact same position.
i live off feeling the need to being creative. i'll admit i am creative at certain merits. what im NOT creative about is the actual execution. im a terrible artist, the fact that you're able to draw backgrounds and scenery is something i have never been able to pull off in my entire life.
the things i draw are nothing that pop out of my mind, it's terrible bullshit that barely represents anything. i cant do complex things even a 14 year old could perfect.
so overall, im not happy or even adequate. im worse than sub-par.