What, what; what happened?? I thought this topic was dead...
Anyway, general disclaimer (everyone will probably ignore it, but I think it bears repeating anyway):
You don't have to be a professional, but you still have to base your "thoughts" on facts. What research/definition are you referencing when you say that? Because from what I read, it doesn't need to be THAT extreme.
Yeah, you do. If you can't afford to get treated. ._.
A little dark, but I think it needed to be said.
...What does that even mean??
Okay, I probably shouldn't be saying this, since my declared position was "I'm not actually self-diagnosing", but no one seems to want to let it go so I might as well go with it. I'll try to be brief:
For a couple years in high school, I kinda felt like a social failure. I WAS shy in middle school, but I managed to train myself out of that with hard work, and I eventually got to the point where I wasn't shy anymore: I wasn't afraid of people, I could even ask complete strangers for help and do that 'polite laugh' thing that people do.
And yet...I still couldn't make a friend to save my life. Not only that; I didn't seem to want it badly enough. When someone wasn't interested in me, I did feel rejected, but more than that I just wanted to stop and go back to being by myself. None of the effort of 'being social' felt like it was worth it at all.
Of course, I do live in a social world, and the fact that I had those thoughts felt wrong to me. I considered so many things: I was just justifying the fact that I wasn't an interesting person, or I was just justifying the fact that I was still shy and hadn't made as much progress as I thought, etc. I depressed myself a lot; I'd think about it for hours and make myself cry...
Now I've kinda just learned to live with the fact that that's the way I am. Even on the internet: I talk to a lot of people, but how many do I really consider friends? How many would I feel comfortable going to for even the smallest favor? I don't know if I have even one person like that. The thing about the internet, though, is that you don't NEED to 'be social' to reap the benefits of social life. You just have to be there. ^^
And now that I understand more about what it takes to make a friend and maintain a friendship, (a) I'm convinced that I am not willing to do all that, and (b) I'm starting to think I only even consider it for the prospect of meeting someone who can entertain me, not necessarily someone to share experiences with. Do I just use people?? It's kind of a dark thought, but a valid one.
So yeah, there you have it; full disclosure! I'll never be able to take this back! Anyway, I don't know HOW you would diagnose that or IF you would diagnose it, but that's just to show that I didn't use myself as an example just because "oh, I feel like staying away from people sometimes; I must have some kind of condition". I actually have real, albeit minor concerns. Like, give me credit for two cents' worth of sense, please... XD