Interpret the 'you' in this question however you want. I mean, if there are some actual horror writers here I'd love to hear about your experiences.
Anyway, I was wondering this because I've recently noticed that I'm horrible at writing horror. Like, really bad. :[ It probably wouldn't look bad to an outsider, at least not right away, because I do know how to mimic what I've seen and heard in the genre before. But beyond that I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. And worse yet, I don't think I even care. ^^;
By which I mean that when I'm writing scenes that are supposed to be suspenseful, when the characters are afraid of something they don't yet know or understand...I don't feel anything. And because I don't feel anything, I find it hard to get into those character's heads and portray what they're supposed to be feeling.
At best, I just continue to 'mimic': I write things that other horror protags say and pray that it looks convincing. =/ By the way, I hate doing this.
At worst (what usually happens...) I start to ruin the tension by writing emotions that don't even resemble fear. ^^; Like curiosity, for one. To me, the natural thing to do when confronted by unspeakable horrors beyond your comprehension is to try your damndest to figure out a way to comprehend the horrors and a way to deal with them, before you all die. But when you focus on that INSTEAD of fear you end up with more of a 'monster taming' story...and all the suspense and intrigue you've built so far just ends up wasted.
I can write comedic fear: as in, fear that's just temporary. Bad things are happening, you're having a panic moment, but as soon as things calm down you probably will, too.
What I'd like to write, and what I think separates good horror from great horror, is deep, prolonged fear. The kind that seeps into your bones and occupies your every waking thought. Fear that, if left to fester, can twist up your mind into something unrecognizable.
I love things like that. I just don't understand them. 6_6; How can you be scared of something the same amount (or more) every day? You never...get used to it? During all the time you spend thinking about it, you never rationalize it? Like, how can something be such a constant presence in your life and never compel you to change the way you respond to it...?
When I try to write it, it feels stagnant to me...which is probably why I keep writing myself away from it until it disappears completely. 6_6; But I suspect that maybe it's not as stagnant as it appears...maybe I only understand it on a surface level.
Like, you'd be pretty awful at writing romance if your only understanding of it was 'A looks at B. A wants to kiss B'. But honestly, if romance wasn't so ubiquitous, it'd be pretty easy to miss out on the other aspects of it without careful study. Even now, there are plenty of romance writers who don't even understand the basic concept of chemistry...and if a similar thing exists in horror (a connection between 'scarer' and 'scaree' that gives the relationship depth)...I probably really need to know that. ._.