Just a quick note on your art. The adults all have fairly realistic anatomy/proportions, but the child (?) in the first page is more stylized and is throwing me off. Their neck and torso look like they belong to an adult, but the arms are very very thin. I'm not sure if that's part of the story or if that is not actually a child, but it makes me wonder if they have a health issue.
If it is supposed to be a child, I have a few suggestions. I would thicken the arms but keep them about the same length. And make the neck a little thinner. Also, I'd loose the detail of the collar bones and muscle on the neck. It might be a bit awkward googling "seven year old" but looking at a bit of reference might help.
