I'm sure you all remember the post I made a couple of minutes ago, but I deleted due to embarrassment. If you don't know what i'm talking about, here's the one from my DA: http://rayleeman.deviantart.com/journal/Oh-boy-536232799
Look, after looking back at the mess I caused, i'm now starting to realize that I'm probably going too far now. And now, i'm starting to feel bad about Dickman all of sudden. And yes, the Email conversation Andrew and I had was somewhat cringe-worthy to some of you, I even cringed at certain points of the conversation. 
I gave him an offer than could benefit for the both of us, and he rejected. But you know, all I did was just spat on his face and shaming for such a sleazy situation. Look, I didn't want to change anything about Dickman's OC, I liked her the way she was, and I felt the same for mine.
I threw a total fit over Dickman for one stupid character That looks almost like mine that I haven't used in five years. I created a huge mess! And do you wanna know why?
Because I was jealous.
But I wasn't just jealous at his character, I was jealous of his art, and at him, because he was such a great artist. He's done work that's better than mine. He's made more characters than I had.
Hell, they look more original than mine! I mean, what do I have, an Elvis Presley Dog character(http://rayleeman.deviantart.com/art/It-s-charlie-447858717), and a superhero OC that looks like a Megaman clone(http://rayleeman.deviantart.com/art/New-OC-Spectrum-Man-488553479).
And let's not forget I have another superhero OC that looks like a mix between Krypto the superdog and Ultraman(http://rayleeman.deviantart.com/art/Omega-dog-redesign-405006801), But I digress.
However, a similar issue happened a year ago with a furry, but it ended badly, and the worst part was I didn't have any proof, so I was being stupid about it. That's all i'm gonna say about it, because it's kinda personal.
But let's say that after that event, I became kinda paranoid because now some people new about that situation and would try to call me out and ruin my reputation. Thankfully, that never happened.
So I decided to not worry and forget about it as much as I could, and swore that I never would try and do something as idiotic as that again. Until now.
But you know what. I learned something from this petty mess I made. I learned that next time, I need to prevent this from happening again by making your own primary character, and hope that I WON'T forget about that character next time, 'cause when it comes to the internet, anything can happen.
In fact, a friend of mine told me that what separates a child from a man is that a man accepts the wrong he did, and does his best to learn from it and better himself through it.
But all in all, Dickman can keep her all she wants, I don't care. I just gotta focus more on my OC and that's it! That's what I call Losing the battle, but winning the war.
So really, I just wanna move on from the stupid problem, but I wanna keep my OC the same as she was before, though I wouldn't mind changing her style much, or at least tweak her design some. I dunno, I’m gonna try and see what I can do.
In the end, I hope this whole thing just blows over soon. In fact, perhaps I should apologize Dickman for all the commotion I threw at him, but I doubt he’ll forgive me, since he’s probably still upset over everything I told to him, not to mention that he doesn’t know me that well, but who knows, I could be wrong. I’ll see what I can do about that.
So, That’s all I got for now. Cheers!
