ALL THESE POINTS!!
Tho I have seen my fair share of BL's where the 'uke' is also a weak and fragile thing, actually a LOT.
But yeah, in my current f/m story, I never put an emphasis on beauty for my heroine. She sometimes gets insecure about her looks only because of a rather prominent burns and scarring on her head. But other than that she doesn't go the extra-mile on her appearance.
And once she gets with her partner, he doesn't make any demands for children either, and she doesn't really want them in particular.