Constructive Feedback Exchange... with a TWIST!

[EbonyKaze]

I don't feel I'm qualified to give a critique,but I can tell you what I think as someone who enjoyed it!

I like the Ink work a lot,It really defines the backgrounds which are detailed and elaborate.The characters personalities are well portrayed,there relatable and funny.I also like the continuity between stories,like Gary's relationship and the cat food company.

The little things I found troubling,however,were sometimes it was hard to understand some of the panels,mainly during the soccer matches and when they entered the closet,without looking it over various times,and although the dialog gives a good feel of the characters,the panel placement kinda makes it feel like too much to take in,I felt It kind of outstretched the last chapter a little.

Other than that,great comic! It was a lot of fun to read!:)

Here's my comic:The Jade Heart
Any feedback would be apreciated.

[KreativeConfusion]

I think you have a really cute and very unique style going on! It can really set you apart from others as long as you stay consistent with it! (Not saying you aren't consistent, I just see some people really change styles sometimes when learned and experimenting, no saying you shouldn't do that either! Jut remember readers like consistency (I should be one to talk haha)

However I think you should work on your word bubbles a bit more. Remember, less is more! Your pages look really cluttered with to many word bubbles and that can make it look a little disorganized. I also noticed sometimes your word bubbles overlap other bubbles, that's something you shouldn't do unless you plan to have it mean sometimes. Such as one character talking over another character.

Aside from that I wish you luck with your comic!

My comic is Tipping Point I'm always open to critique and I'm willing to hear anything about it!

[EbonyKaze]

Thanks for the feedback,I see what you mean I often feud with myself about how much I should write,I'll keep working on it thanks!:)

[Momo]

Hi @kpalmarin

I really like tipping point!!! The coloring/shading is really nice! I really like that you don't explain things right from the beginning. It leaves curios about the situation and what's happening, so I want to read more! The story line seems intriguing and unique, I also really like dalla's character design! Drawing a seperate human-like lifeform can be really hard but you pulled it off really well! Dalla is cute and lovable! I love his personality! I do however, think you should use more effects like the one you used in the last panel on page 4! It really kinda 'sets the mood' so to say!!! I hope this was ok!

My comic is Magical Anime Reika! :3

[Zanreo]

@Momo

Critique: I guess just some general art improvement and practise? Anatomy ect. Characters sometimes look a bit "off-model". Also, sometimes the text is a bit small and hard to read. Especially on the first page, a few words there were really hard to make out. In addition, you might want to make the characters "stand out" a bit more against the background (give characters slightly thicker lines, for example) And one small detail - in the second page, the speech bubble looks like it's coming from the "poof" cloud when I'm assuming it's Reika saying it (always make sure the bubble tails point the right way!)

Positive: While there's not a lot up there yet, I imagine this could be a fun story! Nicely paced start that introduces the main characters and starts off her adventure! Also, love those little characters and creatures in the second page (pineapple with sunglasses? Nice :D) Fun details like that are a nice touch and seem to fit the mood, so keep that up!

My comic is Consolers, the comic about game companies!

[hierogriff]

@Zanreo

Critique: I'd suggest practising anatomy. Study the shapes and proportions of the arms in particular, and how the torso's movement can add to the body language! Also, your necks are a little fat. Keep trying, and STUDY FROM LIFE. Looks like you're trying to emulate manga artists, and there's nothing wrong with having an anime style at all! But if you're copying other artists' drawings, it can stop you from thinking about how the shapes relate to three-dimensional objects, and you can get simple things wrong. Things like fat necks. But don't worry, this is stuff you can learn!

Positive: It looks like you pick your colours carefully, I especially like the colour scheme in the Valve GDC comic. The jokes are well thought out too!

My comic is Outside the Box, a mystery/comedy.

[susanbehrends21]

Critique: I think you your fonts are a good size but could vary a bit more (this is based off of only a few pages)
Positive: I like the dialogue and the way each character is distinct and has different a style (the way they dress/talk)

Mine is a realistic, potentially romantic comic.

http://tapastic.com/series/39-Days-of-Summer

[abigailkbacilla]

Constructive Compliment: The grayscale really helps draw in the atmosphere, the writing is pretty good and the dandelions and typewriter were drawn well and blended in with the tone of the story.

Constructive Suggestion: I would practice on your anatomy, if your comic is going to be realistic. Also it was hard for me to read some of the text (e.g. the text in the typewriter of your first 3 panels, it was too small).

My comic, Commander Princess Maisie Be honest!

[danburnettjob]

Keii4ii Your art style is gorgeous, my one critique would be about your panelling. I think that your story would flow better if you placed more frames beside each other.

My name is Daniel and I have a comic and youtube channel called Dan Yells, where I rant about whatever comes to my twisted mind (most recently what would happen if the Star Trek teleporter bluescreened half way through beaming someone...its not pretty #4: We need some star tech support)

LINKS:
Comic: danisyelling.tumblr.com

[wander_creature]

@danburnettjob, I like your comic! The brand of humor is great, and definitely something people want to see more of. Definitely keep it up. Constructive criticism: Pressure sensitivity. It could benefit you tremendously.

Alright, peeps. Outer Spaces. Inspirational/positive, vaguely sci-fi comic with space llamas and lost creatures. Take a shot!

[nelmathyria]

@wander_creature Your comic is really cool! I like the colors and the composition, it's all really nice to look at and has a nice flow. I would say you should try to incorporate more colors, but the ones you're using look really lovely.

For constructive criticism, you might want to try speech bubbles around the dialogue, to help it stand out from the background more and to differentiate it from the narration. They don't have to be white with black outlines or anything; I think a solid colored bubble that stands out from the background just a little bit could look really nice. Also, do you save your image files as jpgs? If so, you might want to try pngs. I can see a little bit of...compression, I think is the word for it? That sort of fuzzy, pixel-y look. Png files have a much sharper look, so it might be worth trying.

My comic is Heroic Shenanigans, and it follows the adventures of some kids at superhero summer camp. Its third chapter just started!

[KoreanTacos]

@nelmathyria I'm actually already subscribed to your comic, but I had not reached your latest work. What originally drew me to your work was the way you structured your comics in the first chapter. I thought it was a unique way of creating a comic using cut outs, but I still thought your colored stuff and more traditional comic structure is still quite good.

I appreciate the characters with the exception of one, but I'll mention my problem with that a little later. I like how the characters seem to act much like their respected age, and the instructors being "somewhat" adults. I think your writing is quite clever and witty at times. Karen being my personal favorite mostly because I can believe a teenage girl having the kind of existential problems she has having an ability that can be viewed as more destructive than helping. Also I think Emily is also quite charming not only in design, but her ability as well. Never been a fan of 'psychic' but a fortune teller esque character brings plot developments that can be explored.

Now please don't be upset, and take it like a grain of salt... Have you ever seen the movie "Sky High?" I think you pull the young teens with super powers off a lot better than that movie did, and please don't take direct notes from it either. But I bring it up because when it comes to super power genre being completely original is really difficult. One of the first things I noticed when I read the second chapter was the fact that the main protagonist has the ability to vibrate so fast that he can physically appear invisible despite still being able to see his foot inprint in the grass I was surprised Karen didn't mention. As someone who is an avid super hero fan originality can be a real pain in the arse to pull off for an already established speedster ability. I think I would like to see you try and explore something unique to the protagonist, and believe me I can't think of anything that hasn't already happened (Flash kind of ruins everything for the whole speedster ability).

I hope I wasn't being rude, I still like your work and will still continue to read your work. Originally your layout style is what drew me to your comic, but the colors are bright and the characters for the most part are indeed very likable. I think as long as you can keep up the charm factor you might have a good enough comic that can outshine "Sky High," but as long as you avoid the overplayed cliques cliche I think your work will be fine (or do something with it that no one else has even tried with it).

So who wants to chew out my series JODDAS VAPD? It's about a group of college students living a moderately normal life.

[octopusfwb]

Hey KoreanTacos, I'll take a stab at it.

The series has some really funny ones. The whole student loan conversation is great, because the 'damned if you do/damned if you don't" hits so close to home. Homer Simpson said it best when he said "It's funny because it's true." I'd say continue to find those kinds of things and tell them in your cartoons.

Constructive feedback, I'd take some time drawing with pencils and paper and then, if possible, get a cheap Wacom tablet. They can help develop some line thickness variation, which I think will really broaden the appeal of the drawings.

I hope that's helpful.

Anyone want to take a look at OctopusFWB? or the cartoon strip OctopusFWB-Strips?

[KoreanTacos]

Thank you very much, I'm actually in the process of working my way to getting a drawing tablet. It'll be new for me to change from paper/pen method, but I think it would help reduce the paper I use, and the amount of money spent on pens.

[maelstrom51210]

The art style of OctopusFWB is quite appealing to me. I especially like how all the gray tones convey all the textures and shadows without the characters merging into the background. Also, it certainly as a unique premise.

Now for the constructive criticism part. I think that the word bubbles are a bit small and a bit weirdly organized. They could be arranged a bit better to make reading easier.

My comic is Demon King.

[conbon100101]

Positive critique, the font used within the speech is easy to read. You have clearly improved since the beginning of your comic in many ways as well (yes, I went from the beginning on) It was nice to see that you cleaned up the images in the more recent work and it really helped to give the comic a good feel.

For the constructive criticism, I feel like the line work could be improved. (which if you are using a mouse holy crap mad props) however, if not, I would mess around with the weight of the lines. I feel like that could really make the artwork better. Even if you are using a mouse, depending on the program used, you can change the line weight a bit to give it a more fluid feel. That may just be me being overly picky, but I think it would make your work really come together.

I guess the comic I will have someone look over is Sinfully Yours since it is the newer of my two comics and thus featuring the newer art (and has less to scroll through haha)

[TrustyShamrock]

good stuff: theres a lot of things i like but im gunna go with the plot idea. i really like that he can stop time and he just uses it all willy nilly to mess around with things. i definitely think there should be more superpower stories like that without the whole huge cosmic responsibilty junk. its nice to see it changed up every once in a while. and i love how he keeps freezing time when hes tryin to figure out what to say or he gets nervous XD

work on stuff: i think one of the biggest things that seemed off to me is that ya got so many filler pages but not a lot of story pages. a few times i just got confused cuz i couldnt tell if it was part of the story and just seemed really outta place. but i think all ya gotta do is spread them out a little more
hope this was helpful!

heres my comic Robo Hole

[nelmathyria]

Wow, thank you so much for all of this feedback! I'm really glad to hear that the format of the first chapter drew you in, I sometimes worry that it will turn people away before they reach the current, colored style. That's also good to hear that the characters are believable and act their respective ages.

Yes, I have seen Sky High, haha! I totally get the comparison, (and you're not the first person to make it, so don't worry) and while there are some fun ideas in the movie I do hope to do the young superhero concept in a more interesting way. So thank you, I'm happy you think I've done a better job already! Even though you're totally right, it is hard to do something with the superhero genre that hasn't been done already.

I'm actually impressed that you realized Henry was vibrating to turn invisible, as I didn't make that clear and I really should have. I would say though that having original superpowers isn't necessarily my goal, so much as using them in unique ways. (and I love the Flash TV show, so every time I'm watching it I'm thinking about how to differentiate Henry's powers from his, haha)

You definitely weren't rude! i honestly don't mind people drawing comparisons between my work and other things, if the connection occurred to someone, I'd like to be aware of it. So thanks again for the feedback!

[KoreanTacos]

I look forward to reading your next chapter when it comes out.

[donathinfrye]

About Robohole!

What I Dig: The big three for me -- your paneling, your coloring, your wit. The comic dialogue is fast-paced, sharp and funny. It knows its target audience, and like a good sit-com, it doesn't let up on the banter. The paneling is smart, effective and really helps to keep things moving. And the colors are always bright and synergistic with the over-all tone of the story. The sheer amount of energy in your work is an amazing thing.

Constructive Criticism: You have a gigantic imagination. Sometimes, in the heavy action-oriented panels, it might make use of a bit of self-editing. Sometimes you seem to be trying to accomplish too much action in a panel and it gets a bit confusing. I'll give some examples from more recent pages:

CH3, Page 33: This page is particularly hard to follow. That first panel has the bike screeching to a halt (without previous slow-down) and him starting to jump off the bike at the same time -- that might've been better shown with two panels. What happens afterwards is confusing, despite it being very imaginative. Part of that may also be that it's challenging to distinguish some of the machines from each other to tell just what exactly is happening.

CH4, Pages 1/2: You break the 180 rule here a bit, which makes the action hard to follow. We establish the scarecrow on the left side and the girl on the right, on Page 1 -- she's shooting lightning leftward. On Page 2's first three panels, they flip a lot: the girl is now facing the opposite direction from our perspective, shooting lightning to the right -- the big machine in the middle is facing the same direction as before though, the lightning being shot leftward again -- and the scarecrow is facing in the opposite direction, the lightning being shot rightward. And because we only see those three characters individually (one per panel) here, we lose our perspective as a reader. Keeping in mind perspective and the 180 rule, and looking at your layouts from the perspective of the reader who doesn't know what you know will help tighten up the action in your storytelling.

So, in short: think about clarifying the action for your reader to make it easier to follow along, about maybe simplifying how much action is happening and making the actors/reactors super clear, and thinking about those tricky perspective issues. I hope any of that's helpful! Keep up the great work!

My comic: I, Necromancer