@DualDragons:
For your first work ("Eyes Slowly Closing"), I love how unique and creative the character design is, and I love how you've chosen to capture a warrior at peace. Very nice composition. That said, the anatomy looks just a little...off. The hands seem a bit too small, and her right eye is drifting a little far to our left. Her hands and lips are drawn with more attention to detail than her nose, her legs and feet, or the tree, which were very simply rendered by comparison. A few other things that I noticed were the fabric folds next to her feet. They don't seem to have a clear form and were hard for me to read (I thought they were flippered feet for a second :P) Lastly, the linework on her form was much thinner than the linework for the tree or the scribbly bushes in the background, which draws too much attention away from her. It usually looks best when you use progressively thinner lines for background elements, to imply a sense of depth.
I also forgot to mention that "closing" is misspelled, but that's a simple fix.
Colours are great; the bright red on her uniform contrasts the duller greens in the background, really making her pop. Great work!
For your second work (Squid monster!)... I like how the background is dull and the monster and the girl are super bright and saturated, which really makes them pop. I like the colours you've chosen; the teal/orangey/yellow scheme is very appealing. Once again, love the creativity; I feel that there's a great story here.
Things that could be improved... hm... well, the complete lack of crosshatching around the edges looks a bit odd to me. You can definitely do a fade effect where the crosshatching becomes more and more dense as it gets to the centre, but the transition needs to be smoother. As you mentioned, the linework is super rough, and could use some refinement. Lastly, the girl's proportions look a little wonky (her arm looks like it ends in a stub), and because there's no shadow under her she almost looks like she's floating. I would rely more on reference images while you're working; everything will look even better!
I love how annoyed the squid looks
I hope this long-winded critique helped!