Jul 2020
5 / 10
Jul 2020
Jul 2020
Iseitouch
Jul '20

So, 4 months ago, I uploaded my first ever episode for my comic LukUs and I was pretty happy and started calculating how it will go and how I can get it there. I look at references on how people but their strips, bubbles, effects, etc. and at times I feel like I'm doing wrong. I did decide to do Web format but I realized, I would like a book ver. of it as well and so, I did the book format.

Anyways, I usually ask for people to comment not to really tell me if they love it or not, but more of their opinion about it. "How are the characters? Does their personality fit their image? Does the story make sense? Are you able to pick up any new knowledge? Do you know what the title means? Do you have a decent synopsis for the story?" etc.
But It doesn't seem like anyone has anything to say, just "like" and leave.

What I truly want to know is if my story is actually appealing and interesting enough to the viewers and what makes it so. Of it's not, I'd still like to know how I can improve as a comic artist (or artist in general) to create my first ever fan base. I have received fan art from 2-3 people but that's my colorist team (I have about 4-5 colorists that I do pay with the little money I have).

So yep, tell me how I am and I'll take it with grains of sugar :D!

  • created

    Jul '20

  • last reply

    Jul '20
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neardrive
Jul '20

Hi there!

I took a quick look, and it looks nice to me, at least as a first glance (the later chapter look better, though). I can't tell much more 'cause i'm not into this kind of histories, but keep going with it :wink:

I'm sure someone who invest the time to actually read all will give you a more detailled opinion :3

Good luck with your project!!!!

Iris-Grimoire
Jul '20

I'd say the art looks pretty good! Something feels off about the lettering though - maybe the borders of bubbles feel inconsistent, I can't put my finger on it.

Iseitouch
Jul '20

Same T.T) When I look at them I love it but I feel like I'm either missing or not doing something...It might have something to do with the letters (because I believed I changed them in ep.4 because I added more from Photoshop and wanted to try it). But it also feel like the bubbles are like balloons; just...floating idk...

CorissaBees
Jul '20

I think your comic is really strong! Your characters are charming and your art is really great! I love the bright colors and the story seems very cute.

The only critique I have is a technical one and it has to do with the lettering specifically. I'm just diving into the principles of lettering myself and can share some resources that I've found to be very helpful! I'll link to them below. Essentially I think you can work on the following in regards to lettering:

1) I noticed a couple instances where balloon tails overlapped or were layered over or behind or merged with other balloons. Try and avoid doing that as much as possible and stack your dialog in such a way as to make a clear separation between the two speech balloons. Too much overlapping of tails can be very confusing and will cause a reader to have to stop reading just to figure out who is talking. I've done this myself and have been trying lately to correct that in my own work!

2) The goal of lettering is to blend into the comic so much that it becomes invisible and the art and story are the focus. I found myself more focused on the balloons and speech bubbles than I was on the art, especially as I did a quick scroll through to get an overall impression.

3) Try and stick to one thickness for your balloon tails at the point where the tail meets the bubble and keep that consistent throughout the comic. It just looks cleaner and adds a level of consistency to the work overall!

4) Try and stack your dialog in the balloons in a diamond like shape with your longest line of text in the middle of the balloon.

5) Be mindful of the fonts you're using and avoid using too many different fonts for dialog. Avoid serifed fonts for balloons as well. Go crazy with fonts for sound effects and the artwork itself though. ^^

Aaand I think that's all I have! There's a reason why there are professional letterers out there. It's an art form in and of itself and is very difficult to nail down. You're doing a great job and I think once you get the lettering to be more consistent you'll be golden!!

Here's those links for you:

http://www.balloontales.com/category/tips/lettering/

Iseitouch
Jul '20
1

Thank you so much ^^, I'll send examples to see if I got it right, if that's okay :smiley:

amortelito
Jul '20

Hi, I check your comic. It's really cute and I can definitely see the appeal. Since you asked for honest constructive criticisms I can share some thoughts. This is just my personal appreciation and doesn't mean I'm right.

-I don't understand the title, :sweat_smile: Is it a word game? It is easy to remember but I can see some people misremembering the title as "Like us". Nothing wrong with it, but in the original post you mentioned that you wished to know if people understand it.

-The style and designs in the cover seem more appealing than the way they are drawn in the rest of the comic. I don't know why maybe it's the eyes. They look a bit expressionless. And the times where they look more expressive, they are drawn in a mangaish-chibi style.

-In the first sequence, it is hard to understand where are they. We find out that Laula is on a chair on the streets stalking the boy. But by the images, the dialogue seems to be taking place inside the building and initially I struggled to distinguish that the background was the street. We don't know where her crush is placed: outside, inside the shop, near a window? We only see his face in a frame. We find out his location until the second chapter so this "stalker" joke doesn't land very well.

-The short stories are very cute. But I think that nothing has been established so far so readers could prefer an update of the story before having extras. I understand if you upload them to remain active.

-it's too soon to truly see the character's personality, so far they are likable. So far I can't say anything for them to stand out from other comics but I'm sure you have lots of development in mind.

Iseitouch
Jul '20

Thank you so much :smiley: I fixed the street problem because yeah, for episode 1 (Love 1), I was basically testing out the waters of how simple I wanted the comic to be (since the goal was to keep it as simplistic as possible but not too simple). The street and sidewalk now have 2 separate colors (you'll see in epi.5) and I usually draw chibi when I rush or when I want the episode to end on a cute note.

For the expressions, I've working on it by looking at examples on Pinterest and seeing how I can manipulate it to fit the comic style.
The cover, I'm so happy that someone likes it because it took me days to complete it and I thought it wasn't good enough or I'm missing something, so it really puts me at ease hearing that I've done well.

For the shortz, I did upload to keep the updates going but eventually I too got a little bothered and bored with them, especially since it's not fully connected to the story.

Thank you for the critique :smiley: It makes me so happy :slight_smile: