How do you get over a breakup?

[Sadboihours]

How do you get over a breakup? I was dating a girl I thought loved me for 4 whole years. Turns out, she was cheating on me the whole time. What do I do?

[carloswebcomic]

Well, the only thing you can do is get over it.
After a break up, I got to a point where I stopped caring and simply got on with my life.
I met a girls pretty quickly after that, including my now wife.
I think girls are attracted to guys who don't care

[Maps]

I cut the person out of my life. Deleted the phone number, all social media, all photos. It felt therapeutic.

Lived my life and experienced a lot. Then I actually ran into that person again. We’ve been together five years now.

I’m not saying you’ll get with them again. But some of the best moments of my life was letting them go and living my life as a single person. There’s a lot to learn from yourself. Embrace you and don’t panic about the rest.

[DiegoPalacios]

Got into some break ups...the relations weren't as long as yours, but this advice can help:

-Understand that just because 2 people liked each other for a while, that doesn't mean they are meant for each other. If she is not the one, another will be.

-Be thankful you found out she was cheating now and not later.....the situation could be way worse if you were for example, married......you dodged a massive bullet. She is not worth it.

-Is okay to feel sad and cry, if you have someone like friends or family members who can listen to you, you can vent with them.

-Focus on other activities: Work on your projects, hobbies, excercise, anything that clears your mind without harming your health......

wish you the best, i can tell you,in your case, this break up is for the best.

[Kaydreamer]

Oh dude, I'm so sorry. Four years is a long time, that's going to hurt badly enough, and the cheating is like salt in the wound.

The first and most important thing to remember is that you're grieving. You're grieving the loss of a relationship, and the exit of someone you loved from your life. Understand that, allow the feelings the space they need to ebb and flow, and be kind to yourself as you go through that process.

Distractions will help to an extent, but you may also feel like nothing is worth time or effort at the moment, and that's okay. Try to spend some time doing the things you enjoy, even just for a little bit each day. They may feel empty and hollow right now, but they'll start to sparkle again in time.

If possible, spend time with people whose company you enjoy. I never needed people around me more than when I was going through a breakup.

Once you're feeling a little better, getting back into dating can be helpful. I wouldn't advise jumping right back into something long-term unless you find someone absolutely magical - but what I found helpful about it was the reminder that actually, yes, there are other amazing potential partners in the world, and I have not lost my only shot at love. That was really healing for me.

Try to hold as fact that this pain isn't permanent. It feels like it'll last forever right now. I know. But the reality is, it doesn't. It fades away eventually, and while it will leave some scars which weren't there before, those don't sting in the way an open emotional wound does.

(Regarding scars; you may find it difficult to trust, when you move onto new relationships. Acknowledge that, be honest with yourself about it and what's causing it, and be very careful not to project it onto new partners.)

Finally, be as kind to yourself as you can right now. You're hurting. Be generous to yourself for a while.

[caelinalexis]

Write about it. Turn it into a novel/comic. Make money off of it. Flex on your ex, so to speak.

[thecrystalrook]

oof, I'm sorry to hear that, that's rough. Can I ask how old you are? Distract yourself and keep your friends close. They'll help you get through it. Don't date anyone else for a few months. And whatever you do--DOOOOON'T try to open communication up with your ex, and DOOOOOON'T give them the time of day when they come crawling back apologizing (they will, the cheaters ALWAYS do).

[Comic.Kikikora]

Only TIME can heal you ... take care

[FafasMcMelt]

Don't rush it, my man. Take your time. Be sad for a while. Be angry for a while. You are supposed to live these emotions. You'll feel better when the time comes.

[Puck]

It takes time,
I can give an advice from my own experience, don´t swallow /try to mute your emotions, let them out,
it is better in the end

[ShoresofAcadie]

I'm really sorry to hear about your breakup. It's hard enough dealing with the loss of the relationship, but the loss of trust from a situation like that can also be really damaging.

Have you considered talking to a therapist? It might be really helpful to have someone who can work with you to process your feelings and learn healthy coping mechanisms. As someone who has been to therapy at multiple points in my life (particularly during the darkest times), I really recommend giving it a try.

[Iridium]

Greetings!

I am truly sorry for hearing that... I understand how you feel, and it's a horrible feeling to have. Well, I'd advise you to do the hardest, which is to completely block and cut the person out of your life and social medias. If you happened to like or be liked by one of her relatives, unfortunately the communication will have to cease too.

I broke up with my college boyfriend almost 3 years ago and we were together for almost 4 and half years back then. The relationship was too rusted for me to keep investing, since I realized I was being molded into someone I wasn't just to appease him. I was also abused physically and mentally, and I wish that to no one. Sometimes I miss the friend that he was, but I know, deep down, that this person never truly existed. It was a ruse, a character that may have been his real self once, but no longer exists.

My real advice for you is to keep your friends and loved ones close to you as much as you can. Those that you relied on when you told about the breakup, those that gave you that pick-me-up you so much needed, those are the ppl you can count on, and they'll help you heal. Then, one day, you'll realise that this relationship will be nothing more than a fading memory, and you'll be truly free to live with the scar healed.

And then, if someday you feel confortable with dating again, you'll find better ppl. And if you decide not to date again, you'll realise that you won't feel bad about that. You'll feel confident, self-assured and calm. There's no better feeling, trust me.

I hope I helped you somehow.