Hey,
Zenex here
I am the author of RADIATION on TAPAS. I publish weekly to make sure that my reader gets their dose regularly. I will appreciate it if you will support me, to give you your weekly dose of excitement.
With love,
Zx
I feel there is no hook to the description. It seems like a story I have read before. I think there is some issue with the commas in the first sentence (I'm not a native speaker of english, but there is an issue there)
I wouldn't start with a link to your webpage, I would rather put it below the description
I'm not an artist, so my comments will be less professional here. I feel like you excel at close-ups, while your full body shots could use some work, there is some issue with the anatomy of the character, you could consider using 3D models as base to sketch over.
The noses of your characters kinda remind me of Araki's later work (Maybe the line shading also gives that Jojoesque feel)
I like the cover art. It took me a while to get the name, but it clears up after reading the description.
The description is solid, I don't like putting links over it, I would put it at the bottom.
Even if I'm not in love with the concept, the execution is relatively solid, the speech as a vehicle of exposition is pretty good, it dips into exposition dump a couple of times, but it mostly works. Maybe I would've used a different word for the people with Heterochromia if they do have the power to absorb radiation, and leave the Heterochromia as just a symptom of it, rather than being the classification.
I love the artistic choice to only color her eyes.
I'm doing just the first one.
I feel like I'm not the target audience, but I'll do my best.
The cover looks pretty cool, my first thought about "Purple Shades of Blood" was that the story might involve royalty or nobility, as purple is usually associated with those groups.
The description didn't give any evidence to my theory and I felt like it was a bit vague. The only hook I see is finding out why is there Purple Blood. (Unless the one bleeding is a diehard Prince fan)
I'm more on the "wordier" side of the writing spectrum, but I like your writing style, is easy to follow.
I'm doing just the first one.
The cover is kind of generic, not much to comment on or criticize about. It's serviceable for the story but doesn't have anything that pops out.
The description is also generic, I feel like you could change the name of the main character and it could work for a thousand other stories.
The art is solid but unremarkable, the characters clash a little bit too much with the traced backgrounds, you should try to make both a bit more cohesive.
Thank you for your feedback!
I have received mixed reviews about the dialogue tags so I am currently considering whether I should keep them or not.
Thanks for your opinion on the description too. I will be changing it sometime soon to make it fit more with the vibe of the story.
"Ravished with hunger, the world was preparing the devouring of the world."
The whole description is a bit rambling and cryptic. I had to read it multiple times to get an idea of the story.
The art is pretty good, you might want to invest in getting a font that makes more sense with the story.
You have a bunch of grammar mistakes here and there, you might wanna do a check-up.
The cover looks to be traced from other work. I'm always against tracing, you should try to invest in getting proper art. The font used for the title sells me a wacky fun world, but the description kinda goes against that impression.
The description is okay, nothing revolutionary, no notable hooks.
When it comes to writing I don't know why you use FULL CAPS for words. There are better ways to attract attention without going full caps, you never go FULL CAPS.
Hi!
so far I've been doing yonkuma, and have the first chapter of a my graphic novel up;
this is my yonkuma:
not sure where i wanna end to make a contemplation eventually
this is the first chapter, second will be up soon, once am done with some contest entries for manga and all;
thank you
Thank you for the feedback! I've checked through my first chapters and corrected some grammar mistakes I made. I've also changed up my novel's description! Hope this one is more understandable. As for the font... I'm not very good with typesetting so I'll stick with it for now 
Thank you for your opinion though, it's greatly appreciated!
The cover has a lot of personality and pops up. The anatomy could be better, but the style is there, just needs a bit of polishing. The characters are recognizable, the dialogue is snappy and the description works. The main issue is the inconsistency of the art, but apart from that, you have an interesting style of narrative. I love you took your time in the first chapter to create an atmosphere.
The art is what it is, I feel like the description sells a more action packed story and the art gives itself more to comedy hijinks.
Panelling feels a bit rough, you could get more mileage by having gutters between each pannel or using a webtoon esque format with the panels split apart, allowing them to have more individual impact and avoid blending them together. Plus the lines around the panels being so rough give the comic a feeling of being unpolished and messy. I checked the later chapters and you improved a bit, but there is a lot of room to improve the panelling.
I'm just doing the first
Is a biographical 4-koma so there aren't many comments about the concept or the description, it's what's on the text.
I find it jarring the use of Japanese words so often, people who aren't in the know won't get it half of the time. Some of your jokes fall flat, not because they're bad, but because they've been really overused. Writers talking about how hard being a writer is almost as old as time.
The art is serviceable for the concept, nothing groundbreaking.
https://tapas.io/series/So-Childish1
I await to hear your critique/opinion
I think the description could be a bit less general and more focused on something. It doesn't give me a hook or a point of interest.
The art is top tier, among everyone on this thread, to my opinion, you have the best art.
I loved the narrative device of the child reading a book, is tried and through, but still works and you make it work perfectly. Kudos to you and your artist.
I feel the description is a bit too vague, you introduce a concept but don't give any explanations about it.
The cover could use some work, there are many really cool free fonts you can find online to improve it for starters. And consider saving to get an artist to do your cover.
I don't know if the village is under siege.
Joking aside, if this was the first thing I read in a book I opened a bookstore, I wouldn't continue, because it feels like the information would keep being repeated.
First, put your links under the description, not as the first line.
The description has a lot of issues, like sentences that are too long and have to many commas and a couple of grammar mistakes.
The art is good, maybe a bit flat, could use half tones or more shading.
Comic is a visual medium and is better to show, rather than just tell. We learn a lot about Cody on the first pages, but everything is told to us, we don't see it. Talking to himself is the easiest, and dare I say cheapest, way to dunk exposition. You could have used a friend at the very least to make it sound more natural, show him stepping on puddles, visually giving us cues both to his lack of computer and his bad luck.
Thank you for the feedback! The link is there because of the dashboard link, but to be fair, I haven't posted much on deviantArt lately so it's only useless. And thank you for checking it out even if the concept is not your favorite! Hopefully I will get better at storytelling by showing more rather than telling.
I can't? Its automatic from the page. So, yeah.
English is not my first tongue, so also, yeah. I do my best with the little I have.
Absolutely agree! This are the things that I can't learn just by doing. That must be told by an outside eye so I can catch it quicker than I could on my own.
Thank you very much for the honest review @Kuma!
Hello! I've already reviewed Centris a bit, but I have to say that your cover art is gorgeous and definitely drew me in. The summary doesn't draw me in all that much, because I'm not that much of a fantasy nerd, but I like that you introduce the main plot threads quickly. I also found one error, "is, without realizing, drafted to become a paw in the silent war between the factions of the court". I believe it should be "pawn" instead? Aside from that, there's a little bit of wordiness that doesn't work in your favor. For a bit of a catchier blurb, you might want to condense it a bit. For example, you could edit the sentence above into "a young mage ... is unwittingly drafted into the silent war between the factions of the court." or "a young mage unwittingly becomes a pawn in the silent war between the factions." Cutting out words and phrases that mess with the rhythm will help a lot. It's also just a lot of info for a blurb.
I have a few concerns for the hook of this one. First is the cover, though I can't do much about it because I have no money to spare for commissions. It doesn't really strike me as a BL cover, and I also think that on Tapas, characters sell really well, so having a cover without that might drag me down. There's also the fact that my setting is based on the Joseon dynasty, but there's nothing on my cover to represent that, so the reader would have to look into the tags and my blurb to get that part. Beyond that, my blurb might actually be a bit too short. I really try to walk the line of not revealing too much while still showing the core of my story to draw people in. I don't want to misrepresent it. Anywho, let me know what you think!
Here is my comics
Comics;
Genre: Action, Drama
Genre: Action, Drama
Genre: Action, Horror
Genre:Action, Drama
Hope you like it..
Hello. My series is a long runner at this point. But I have always had problems when it comes to a description or a thumbnail image lol. I'm never sure what works, so some feedback would be helpful : )
Thanks a lot for the feedback, Although, I mostly have some difficulties with the Description to be honest, as I don't know how to put down in a few words the premise, originally it was longer and more specific on the various stories, but after a while, it might have been a drawback, so I wanted to compact it by also referencing the "Introduction" chapter, and yet it appears it's not working even in this way... I had no idea at all, I always had difficulty with a synopsis (Mostly, trying to explain a lot with just a few words, I tend to be over descriptive in the scripts).
EDIT: Ok, It is shorter than the last one, but I guess this one is more specific and less general, while also not giving away too much.
Ah, I'm glad I could help! I always worry that I'm being too harsh, but the teacher in me wants to help as much as I can.
Apart from working on videogames I practice Pro-Wrestling, so I'm acustomed to getting hit really hard, I have thick skin.
yea i totally understand the issue with the background as im only doing everything myself and backgrounds take a long time to do. as for the story it will take a bit longer to get the full story going as its just the beginning. its slow. but i feel after a few more episodes the story will go better. as for the names they're names i gave them with i was a teen and only changed the last names. mind you i did originally create this story when i was 16 sooooo as of now about....19 years ago. lots of things have changed since. but lets see where it goes. but totally appreciate the feed back. <3