Mistaken Identity Anyone?

[dojo]

To be honest, the majority of people I know kinda pick one gender and assume everyone is of that gender unless told otherwise. On places like tumblr I noticed the majority assumption seems to be female, but then you'll go on furaffinity and everyone assumes you're male. I personally have been trying to stop doing that, myself, and have been trying not to label people as anything until I know what they want people to see them as. (IT STILL HAPPENS, THOUGH.....)

Me, I'm bigender so people picking male or female and sticking with it is 100% okay with me because chances are whichever they call me by is what I'm presenting as anyway, although I will say MOST online circles I am more comfortable with male pronouns, but there are some I prefer female. I really just depends on the environment.

[VermillionWorks]

I use Daniel's deadpan mug as my avatar, but usually my handle is 'SarahN' so I can get away with it since 'Sarah' is a pretty big dead giveaway of me being a girl, even with the guy icon. XD I honestly forget why I decided to use VermillionWorks here on the forums instead...I'd rather use SarahN....but oh well.

...but yeah, I'm a girl, to anyone who doesn't know. XP

[miesmud]

I have a comic about me, with me as the main character. And for some reason multiple people thought I was transitioning or something when I cut my hair from super long to super short. Someone even wanted to interview me about my gender? But I don't identify myself as someone with a cool gender, I'm just a grill, so these comments made me feel a bit weird.

Here on the forums I never have any idea what gender people have. But my brain links people's avatars to their gender, so I will always use they/ them to be sure that I'm not misgendering someone haha.

[Wishjacked]

I'm just here to second what everyone else is saying. I've actually also always assumed you were a girl, because your avatar is a girl (and I knew it was your character! But I'm still used to seeing a girl in association with the words you say) and also because you've been pretty open about how your comic is based on some of your experiences (so I automatically link the character's identity with your own, further cementing the idea that you and her are very similar, if that makes sense).

@VermillionWorks also makes a fantastic point— I actually have always known she's a girl, because even though she has a male avatar I know her name is Sarah. Since you go by AspieGamer everywhere, I can't make any assumptions based on that. So really the only thing I have to go on without stalking your profile pages is your avatar.

AAAAAND also just wanna say I had a cow as my profile picture on a forum for like… years. When that gang saw a picture of me (a human), they were outrageously weirded out because….. I was….. I was a cow…...

[Quinineer]

I think that on websites with avatars, you just subconsciously associate the person with the avatar whether you like it or not. Mine's just a placeholder for now. I should get around to changing it.
Though if I browse a site such as imgur or reddit, I just assume everyone is male until otherwise indicated, and vice versa with sites like tumblr.

[WakaXO]

I can honestly say this has never happened to me, though I use a different icon for almost every site I'm on, so now I'm wondering if people think of me accordingly on each site... Like my icon on these forums is fanart I did of Finn from Adventure Time, so do my peers on this forum see me as male? ( If this is the case then I like the thought that people on my DA think of me as a floating cup of coffee that shoots out hearts, lol. )

Truthfully @Aspie_Gamer I also thought you were female, even though I knew your avatar was Susan. Now that I think about it, its very odd that I made that connection in my mind when I knew your avatar does not equal you. You are quite right, people do tend to connect a person to their avatar/icon. I think its because in this kind of situation people can only rely on their sight, the only 'part' of you on display is your avatar and people have to gleen what they can from that. Combined with the fact that people are always subconsciously looking for new information, it makes sense that people assume others identities based on their avatars.

[joannekwan]

Yep, I too mentally associate the avatar with the user, I do use "they/them" in reference to others to be safe unless I know for sure they use one gender pronoun set or another.

As for you @Aspie_Gamer, I first associated you with your Toad avatar and since Toad's male I leaned more towards a masculine representation for you.

[JessJackdaw]

Ahh, yes, but it doesn't bother me in the slightest. Mostly because "Jackdaw" if people don't know it's a bird, sounds like a weird nickname of "Jack." XD

Otherwise I just have some sort of birb as my icon usually, so most people see me as genderless.

[Emma]

I mean, I've always presented myself with a female avatar, except for on Twitter, where it's my character Dave who is the icon. So I don't think I've ever been mistaken for a guy or anything else.

As for you, I've actually known that you were a guy for quite some time now.

[AnnaLandin]

I get mistaken for a man on occasion - less these days, when I use my real name as a user name, but it used to happen all the time when I used more gender-anonymous usernames. It seems that on the internet, anyone who is not a.) using a female-coded avatar, or b.) a female name, is assumed to be male. Back when I used more neutral avatars/usernames, I've had people get genuinely upset when they found out I was a girl - as if I had somehow betrayed them by not being one of the boys.

It was really weird.

I kinda get why the assumption happens, though; I tend to just think of people as their avatars. If your avatar is a frog, and I meet you in real life, I'm probably going to spend the first ten minutes feeling vaguely confused as to why you aren't a frog. ^_^; I tend to go with assuming gender-neutrality until someone overtly identifies themselves as a specific gender, though.

[agentfink]

All the time. Most people I chat with online assume I'm a gay man (I mention my husband a lot). When they learn I'm actually a female named Jay, the little light bulb goes off-- "oooooh!"

It's amusing and I don't get offended, but I also realize I am not making it easy for them-- don't exactly broadcast my sex-- my avatar on the forums is a guy and his dog. My twitter? A cat. Honestly, I would totally be fine being a married gay guy-- we'd be such a cute birding, geeking, pet parent couple.

I remember your Toad avatar as well, but I assumed you were a girl because of your protag being a girl! I don't know why I made that connection, because I read comics created by females with male protags (vice versa) and don't assume that. Maybe I came across their name in their comic credits? Interesting fun topic...

[J.Lovelace]

Funny enough, if there's no online info about gender of a certain person, each time I think someone is a guy, it turns out to be a girl, and the other way around too, gosh it's so embarassing XD

And about me well... since I'm genderfluid, you can't really... mistake... my gender?

Dr. Oak: Are you a boy or a girl?
Me: Yes.

I'm two in price of one, what a bargain.

[infectedbloodcomics]

You show a female avatar, you'll be taken for a girl or a woman about 99% of the time. Quite simple. As for me, I tend to scare women out of ladies' bathrooms because at first glance they think I'm a man. I honestly couldn't care less, given that in a woman - XX chromosomes and all the biology and socialization that goes with it.

[CalimonGraal]

I've gotten mistaken to be a guy occasionally [especially when its on a thing that doesn't show avatars] as my username is pretty gender neutral i think.
but most of the time people know i'm a girl probably because of how i type and the way i draw loool.

forgot to add that i also tend to associate avatars to people's gender and/or how they type, though i've been trying to refer to people as they until i'm sure of what they go by lol.

[spadesart]

jokes on y'all i actually AM my oc

[vongcw]

I used to play a girl avatar in Gunbound (uhh... Korean video game like Worms... except with uber cute tanks). Hahaha - I'd get so many guys trying to pick me up and... give me stuff... I'd always reveal I was a guy before they really sent me anything and they'd be really disappointed.

I honestly used to think... gee... if I were a pretty girl, I wonder what life would be like? Would I milk guys for all their worth? Could I really live out Madonna's I'm a Material Girl? Hahahaha.

[Zanreo]

I've been mistaken for a guy quite a lot... maybe because a lot of the forums I went to were male-dominated and people assumed male unless stated otherwise. It's even happened on forums where gender is shown in your profile? I am always quick the correct them when this happens because I tend not to be comfortable being assumed male (especially annoying when it's just because "assuming everyone on this site is a guy by default")... I guess the name Zanreo is kinda ambiguous, but I've gotten this with more "feminine" nicknames too... My avatars have been a lot of different things over the years - female characters, male characters, various creatures like Pokemon (on certain sites years back I switched avatars a lot to whatever cool/funny/weird picture I saw and liked), but the last years it's usually either Yoshi, Nintendo from my comic (female), or myself.
Somehow, I find it less "uncomfortable" being mistaken for a boy irl (which has happened a few times) than online? Still catches me off guard, but for the former I'm usually more "haha ok whatever but I'm actually a girl though"

For others, I usually just go with "they" unless/until I know, and try not to assume unless actually stated (or listed in profile)

[Mocha]

Well im female and am quite feminine looking in real life so one ever questions my gender then, but on the internet where I remain anonymous quite a few people have mistaken me for a guy. I'm guessing it's probably because I usually post meme-y type comments and jokingly flirt with people. Oh and also I usually have a male fictional character as an icon so there's that too....

[purrlpankras]

I go by many names...

• Purrl Pankras
• Purrl
• ZenithZero
• Zen San
• Zenpao
• Master Zen
• Zen senpai
• Zenith Sensei
• Hobo

[Mocha]

How do you keep track of all those names!? You deserve a medal or something...