Share Your Story (read desc)

Prologue- I had a digimon-shaped void in my heart for a while now, mostly from a lack of an original series for a while.

Part 1. As a grew up and encountered some friends, I started to also notice how weird some of the relationships we share are. Some people are weirdly servile, others like to talk up a lot to hide insecurities; many co-depended are quite toxic and stomp on personal growth.

Part 2. I like mythology and I think a lot of parts of the world are underrepresented. For example, irish, celtic and scotish appear here and there, but nothing mainstream comes to mind that uses elements from that.

Part 3. I combined all those into a blender and started writing my own fantasy/action/adventure with a large cast and monster-human partnership, inspired by digimon. A lot of their relationships are actually a bit weird, peculiar, some are instant buddies, others become family. And it's all wrapped in a lot of nodes and winks at irish/celtic mythology. (Not gonna be 1:1. Dagda doesn't exist in my story and Lugh ain't a nice boy for example)

The idea for Nixvir came from a scrapped novel called The Snow Terrorist. Many of the ideas from the comic came from that scrapped novel like the snow world. Years later, when the world was plunged into lockdown, I began drawing it as a way to occupy my time. It was originally my intention to never show my masterpiece to anyone else and, in the event that I die from COVID, to be buried with it forever unpublished. However, when some bastard insulted my work by pointing out that all my accomplishments are useless in this world - some wanker has been reading too much Lovecraft, if you ask me - I decided to publish it online. But where could I go? Not Webtoon. I’d heard bad things about Webtoon, like the fact that they abuse their content creators. So, without really thinking, I came here, and deliberately took advantage of the system to build a small but largely devoted fanbase around it. It hasn’t always worked - sometimes it hasn’t, sometimes some closed-minded person always leaves (their loss) - but it has been largely beneficial to me.

I built my fanbase up through the sweat of my brow and the skin of my teeth, and it is thus, having come to the conclusion of my story that I share my tale with you, for you to peruse if you are interested.

So I had this dream 11 years ago, and it stayed in my head rent-free for a decade. It was a wild space adventure that ended in a way I never saw coming. Writing it had always been something I wanted to start doing, but I had a lot of trouble convincing myself that anyone would want to read it.
At first, my idea was to make it a comic, but the amount of artwork involved got overwhelming, so it stayed as an idea until a short time ago. When the AF Tourney was announced, I decided to use that as motivation to begin writing, whether people read it or not!

I largely wanted to explore the ideas and themes in my novel about things like extreme capitalism, unchecked corruption and family dynamics, such as the secrets you never tell and what happens when decisions blow up in your face.

At this stage, my main goal is to entertain people with a good adventure story. I want people to enjoy the stories I enjoy, but I have to tell them first. So here I am!

Now that I have finally started my writing journey, I look forward to sharing all the fun stories that are going on in my brain.

My father was a tattoo artist. So, since I was small I always wanted to draw. So that is where my love of drawing came from.
But he abandoned the family when I was 8, I think. Basically as soon as I beat cancer. (Probably also important but due to trauma I can't remember anything) So. That left me, my brother, and my mother. My earliest memory is when I was 5 and she called me a "useless bitch" in front of her and my friends. That never really stopped. Useless, worthless, miserable, so onband so forth. Always some kind of "bitch". Always the "biggest mistake she ever made". Slap me, scream at me for any little perceived mistake, berate me for not coming to her fast enough when she called. That is when the escapism started. At age 11 I found my best friend, and by 12 we were writing full novel length stories. I clung hard to fantasy, to the point I can recite every event of 20 stories we either wrote or planned but my actual life during that time is largely lost. At 12 my teacher said I was a great writer and I decided I would always continue, for her.
Things got worse as my brother reached his teenage years (I'm older). I had already been beaten to submission, cutting, being as small and quiet as possible. So when he started beating me, leaving huge bruises and welts all over me, picking up my cat by the troat and putting him against the wall... well. It was easier for mom to tell me to shut up and be "mature". Don't be a tattle tale. So deeper into fantasy land I went. RP forums, more stories, some solo works. And trusting more trauma upon myself since as a teen, even the 20+yr old man obviously grooming me was a better option than home.

I left the house at 19, and though I had to return later for finance reasons, things calmed down by then. I'm out proper, now. My writing has gotten more "horror" focused now that I could truly unpack what my childhood was. Since there is a lot I haven't mentioned. Wrote what you know, and I know the horrible, helpless feelings that accompany most horror. My comics are a mostly a relic from my old escapism so they haven't been touched by my writing's bitter negativity.
My current novel, or collection of short stories, is really just a bunch of self expression.
My current comic is a remake of a story I wrote back in high-school.

I've loved writing my whole life, but I started writing professionally when I was 15 years old because I needed some way to make money and I couldn't really get a summer job because I don't speak the language of the country where I live. When I was around 16 or 17 I started working toward writing with my whole heart and soul because I realized it would be my only lifeline. I don't have much of an education and I can't afford to go to college or anything like that, so the only way for me to be able to prove that I was equal to other people in any workplace arena was to really excel at my writing, and gain credits to prove that I knew what I was doing, even if I didn't have a college education. It's been very difficult. You'd be surprised how many companies won't hire writers unless they have college degrees. For that reason, I've been freelancing a lot and writing for a lot of magazines and competitions, which led me to trying to write for the Tapas AF tourney, and this is the story I made for it:

Since I was little I always enjoyed reading I remember reading Babysitter Club books and Ramona books. My family is super religious so there was a limit of what type of media I could consume.
Then one day as an act of rebellion lol I watched Sailor Moon then DBZ,and Yuyu Hakusho. Different shows that introduced me to different ways of storytelling. I fell in love with anime and began to watch it whenever I could.
Then in high school I was introduced to Naruto thru the anime and Bleach. I began going to the library and read my first manga it was Death Note vol 13 since the volume 1 was checked out. I fell in love with manga and decided to checkout Beck Mongalion chop squad a musical series in which my parents couldn’t complain about . Then I took a chance with Vampire Knight which didn’t become a favorite but another series I read with it Fruits Basket did. For years I would read manga at the library and sneak to watch the anime that I enjoyed the most,shonen for the main part. I would get glimpses of Cowboy Bebop and Wolf’s Rain if I was lucky.

Then I was introduced to Berserk the 97 anime. I instantly fell in love . The world , relationships between all three characters of Guts Griffith and Casca. Miura world inspired me as well the world of Kubo I wanted to write and create my own manga. So for years I started and never finished any of my stories. Some of them I plan on finishing. I continue and hoped that maybe this is the one. Then one day I found the YouTube channel Tale Foundry. Apparently they had a series where inspiring authors would write short stories revolving around a specific prompt. I loved listening to the twitch livestreams and YouTube videos. I wanted to participate in these and so I did. I wrote a couple until one particular prompt I forgot it lol but because of said prompt I wrote the story of The Lost Forest. A story where a girl looses her brother in mysterious ways. I wanted to focus on this novel and nothing else. I began to get back into read fantasy and sci fi stories in which I couldn’t consume beforehand.

Now years later I’m able to create freely and plan on finishing The Lost Forest.

My motivation to write started out as a coping mechanism for my problems growing up. Dysfunctional abusive parents, being bullied outcast in school (cared more about leveling up in fighting vs my grades. Was really that bad) and being incel in my young adult years put a lot of rage in me.

I remember it was so bad at one point literally felt like I was already in hell. Needed to cope real hard. My other coping mechanisms were joining a full contact MMA gym (bare minimum you come home with every single muscle sore... if not blood on your face lol) and being involved with certain extremist type groups.

But fast forward to the present day, no longer have the rage even if I try to bring it out again.

Feels more like I'm just obeying the dictates of a higher power far greater than myself. And it feels fulfilling.

Because I'm telling you... if it was all about trying to be popular and lifting up my own ego, AngHell Dela Blackpill won't exist. I'd be doing a totally different comic that I know will get popular

Older completed works:

I think it was 2022 when my comic journey truly began. At that point I was into drawing characters a little, I had a small handful of ocs. (I had to go look at my old projects on scratch to figure out when this was ) I was still an art baby with almost 0 anatomy/rendering knowledge.
This is when me and my sister created this pirate character and created some lore around him. The story grew, and my sister and I had this little fantasy hope that someday I could make it into a comic.
Eventually, I decided that I should try to make a practice comic. I had this vague idea for a story inspired by some (kinda cringe) fanart I made for someone. I was mainly just stealing their character’s color pallet (I drew their oc as a superhero) and I stole the superhero idea from myself too.
The plot wasn’t fleshed out, and when I started trying to draw the first panel I didn’t have a clue what to do. So I scrapped it and forgot about it for a while.
Eventually I decided to try again, and at that point I had forgotten the mc’s name so I gave him a new one, August. Then I changed literally everything in the story and made it a sci-fi instead of a superhero story. The only thing that stayed the same was the mc’s skin and hair color. This comic actually worked! I did it! (Not before failing to plan well and restarting once) but you can read it if you like:

I never finished it and I don’t plan to. The storyline was way to long
(Also, the og superhero story actually comes back later. Couldn’t let a good story go to waste ig)

On to my current series. I had this little story floating around in my head at some point. (Now that I think about it, the plot was like miraculous ladybug without the miraculousness or ladybug…) anyway, the villain in that story (who slayed evilly, but was a terrible person) had a girlfriend who was like a snake lady. I decided to redesign her in my math class one day and made her a gorgon. (snake hair) Doing that made me want to give the villain guy a backstory and made me think about how he met his gf, and eventually I made a better plot based on that and he ended up the MC. I started making this ugly lazy ahh version of the comic just for fun, then I realized “hold up, I love this story.” And restarted it to make the plot/art better. Having that made me have less motivation for August, so that’s kinda where I stopped that. Here it is:

yeah I yap a lot about this subject

My entire life I’ve been inspired by many different anime and manga throughout my life and I use to make a bunch of stories based off of them whenever I was younger. I stopped once I got older and started reading more than watching things. I read manga like Oyasumi Punpun, Vagabond. Aku no hana, JJK, and many more.

This year I started reading a manhwa called Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint which is now my favorite piece of media ever. I’ve been reading the novel planning to finish the novel before the anime comes out. It inspired me to write a novel myself and finally get out my ideas to many other people.

ORV was my inspiration to write but my inspiration for the story and its plot is pretty non existent. I got the idea from just listening to music and while listening to Rarenai by MiMiNARI, the idea just popped into my head. I kind of combined the song with the many other ideas and plots of older stories I would think about when I was younger and made it into something that would appeal to a wider audience and even myself. My main goal is to entertain many people and gather a fanbase that actually enjoy my story!

Without my enjoyment in reading, gaming, watching shows, and music, this novel would not have came to existence. Hope you enjoy reading!

My writing journey began with forum roleplays (RPF), or play-by-post RPGs. I used to be a gamer, and I've always liked games that offer a flexible character design mechanic. RPF allows total freedom of character creation, and you might even be able to participate in the worldbuilding process.

But RPF is a very fickle beast. A lot of the RPs I join often "dies" after just a few posts because the OP just don't care to update the story beats and quests the characters can react to, and sometimes the RP don't even start at all beyond character creation.

There was only one RP I joined that managed to last longer than a few weeks. In fact, it managed to run for several years. The OP was quite thorough in building the world, power mechanics, levels, and event prompts, so I managed to develop the characters more than any other RP characters I've created before.

But then the OP kept on making changes to the world in ways that I dislike, changed my characters' backstories without my permission, and generally behaved in a manner that made writing for that RP feel like being in a cult. So I had to drop everything related to that forum.

Since the characters have grown on me, I tried to cobble something together to play them as I would have liked rather than the distorted versions I ended up with when I left the RP, although I couldn't really come up with anything concrete.

When I came across the Tapas's AF Tourney, I decided to try fit in the various story ideas I've had in the past into something coherent. That's how If I Die Tonight, Will You Remember Me? started.

I must admit that I haven't been committed to this novel as much as I should. I have another idea for a story that I really want to write about. It's meant to be a comic, but since it's historical, it needed a lot more research and prepare a solid narrative before I can start, so a lot of my creative energy has been diverted to the other project.

Thankfully, I'm leaving my current job the end of this year, and what I plan to do next (hopefully) will give me more free time to juggle both.

HEY EVERYONE!
I just re-edited my first 10 chapters! Some were entirely changed, but all have been made more cohesive. They're very old chapters so it had to be done eventually! Very proud of the way they read now!

I would really be honored if you give them (another) chance!