So it turns out the main antagonist is your father...with a twist

[DokiDokiTsuna]

This situation is less of a 'they were always your father and you just never knew' and more of a 'they basically married your other parent and became your father just to be in a position to control you'.

I swear I've seen this done before...the only instance I can think of, oddly enough, is that episode of the original Powerpuff Girls with Sedusa/Ima Goodlady. ^^;

But anyway...I've been toying with this subplot for a while in a certain script, and since the writing is going so well, and this is exactly the sort of half-nightmarish-half-lowkey-hilarious thing that would fit right in, I'm going to make a serious attempt to use it.

The only problem is that I've never seen much further than the initial insanely awkward and tension-filled confrontation...as fun as that probably will be, if this situation persists, it will likely color the entire latter half of the story, and that's much more important.

I can see them forming a sort of dysfunctional parent-child relationship (MC would have to manage it somehow, in order to keep his mother alive...) and I'm just wondering what interesting things I could do with that.

Some details, if it helps:
-This whole situation is mostly implied...at least the way I imagine it now. Mom and Antagonist aren't actually married; I think the most that will be explicitly told to the reader is that they basically live together, and that she trusts him.
What makes it a little weird (and implies there may be more to this) is that MC's actual father (Mom's actual husband) does exist; he's just unfortunately trapped in another dimension atm (and/or dead...no one really knows yet). So it does look as though she's gotten a 'replacement', so to speak. ^^;

-MC is an amnesiac, who doesn't actually remember Mom. I don't mean to set up that Antagonist could lie to him and make believe they're really related (although that would be SO fun, it would require Mom to also lie to him and she wouldn't do that).
I just mean that MCs reaction to this sitch is a little subdued, compared to what it might be for the average person to watch a known murderer move in on the only family they have left. ^^; He protects her out of his usual heroic obligation, not because he has any special attachment to her.

-In case it's not obvious already, Mom is okay. ^^ She has no idea what's going on, and is just delighted that her long-lost son and her new friend(?) already seem to be well-acquainted.

-What Antagonist wants is to force MC into a kill mission against a bigger threat (bringing their initial conflict back into the story, so MC can't avoid it anymore~). The solution seems like it'd be simple-- why not sacrifice the mad god for your long lost mother-- but (a) by that point, the mad god will be inhabiting the body of MC's friend, who for all intents and purposes is a 9-year-old boy...
...And (b) MC is a bit of a pacifist by nature. I know heroes who 'don't kill' can be annoying, but MC isn't Batman or anything; by then it should be clear to the reader that assassination would be way out of character for him.

[An_Alias]

Would it be fair to compare it to a "Cinderella's stepmother" sort of situation?

[DokiDokiTsuna]

Would it be fair to compare it to a "Cinderella's stepmother" sort of situation?

I don't think so...for one thing, she didn't marry Cinderella's father specifically for the privilege of abusing her, did she? The arrangement just happened to come with an innocent puppy she could kick around.

And secondly, I think a large part of the 'Cinderella' archetype is the despair of living in a family that treats you like a slave instead of loving you; the stepmother is even more evil because of how we know she should act towards her stepdaughter.

When someone who is already a villain (and is obviously only in this for their personal gain) comes into the family, though, it's a little different. ^^; You expect that behavior from them; rather than feeling sorry for the MC you're usually mostly rooting for them to find a way out of that situation.

[IndigoShirtProd]

Okay so, what about Hamlet?

[DokiDokiTsuna]

Okay so, what about Hamlet?

1. That's not helpful at all, but ok
2. I've never actually read/seen Hamlet, but from what I've heard about it, I guess the setup is somewhat similar...although the character dynamics, motivations, and tone of the story are all completely different, so...yeah, not helpful

[An_Alias]

Finding a way out of the situation is still the primary goal in both cases, but there's a difference in the tone/genre (and the specific situational details you've described)? You're looking to create scenes that focus on suspense while avoiding scenes that focus on the tragic elements? It might be helpful to know what genre/tone you're shootin for

I guess part of where I'm confused with the dynamic you're describing is how the antagonist has any actual control over the MC when the MC has little to no attachment to the mother (because of the amnesia). How old is the MC? What is preventing the character from escaping the situation?

[IndigoShirtProd]

I meant as an example since cinderella isn't similar enough to what you've brought up. But if it doesn't work, it doesn't work.

[DokiDokiTsuna]

It might be helpful to know what genre/tone you're shootin for

Well, there's this:

this is exactly the sort of half-nightmarish-half-lowkey-hilarious thing that would fit right in

And I thought it was pretty obvious from the way I explained it that I was going for a sort of 'dark humor' thing. Did it really sound that ambiguous...?

You're looking to create scenes that focus on suspense while avoiding scenes that focus on the tragic elements?

Yes and no. I don't really want to focus on tragedy (see the above). But I don't want to focus on suspense either...I mean how long can you beat the horse that is 'my mother's in danger'...? After you make it clear in the first relevant scene, I think the reader pretty much gets it. Anything after that is just emotional theater...I'd much rather spend that time progressing the story. I'm just looking for ideas on how to do that.

...I don't know if there's just something wrong with the way I write, but almost every time I start a topic like this I don't get anything out of it, and the few people who do reply just end up making me feel like I'm asking for something that's literally impossible to understand. =/

I can feel it happening already...but I might as well see this through to the end. '_';

[EncryptedWriting]

Major spoiler but

This is literally what happened in ny story. Exactly.

[An_Alias]

The original post reads a little scattered to me which is why I'm sort of confused and trying to find a common ground example to work from. Like, it's a flow of ideas instead of being organized into more of a list-like format. I'm used to the list style when brainstorming since it tends to be easier to communicate with and is easy to refer back to opposed to paragraphs of descriptions. This might be why you're getting these sorts of responses. It's easier to digest and brainstorm when the basic parts are literally listed out (dark humor genre) rather than implied (half-nightmarish-half-lowkey-hilarious).

[DokiDokiTsuna]

Like, it's a flow of ideas instead of being organized into more of a list-like format.

Well...it IS just a casual request; if I had no idea how to write this story and I was desperate for ideas, I might explain things a little more matter-of-factly. But I was just 'doing writer things' and considering a new idea, so I explained it the way I was thinking about it.

Besides, I've seen people with much longer and more convoluted 'what's going on in my story' essays that get much more help more easily. So. T_T

To be honest, I think it's just the genre/tone...most people here (the ones who don't write romance) write stories in the feel of your average action anime: drama-driven, serious; maybe there are some humor moments but they're pretty basic and/or not important; they fit into the plot without changing it.

Stories that actually use humor as a driver for the plot and to determine how the reader experiences different aspects of the drama (which ones get 'angst' moments and which ones don't, for instance, regardless of their effects) are a little more rare, but that's what I like to write.

But if you don't know how to do that (or don't understand why anyone would) I can see it being confusing...I can't see it being unfathomable, to be honest, but I can see where someone would just not know how to reply.

...I kinda wish they'd figure it out before questioning me, deciding I don't make sense, and then just disappearing, though. =/

[An_Alias]

Next time try explaining things with who you're explaining it to in mind. Other people don't have the same thought processes you do, so it can be hard for others to follow your train of thought, even when you think it's obvious.

Let me try again.

The antagonist's goal is to convince/persuade/trick the MC into murdering for him.
If the MC is trying to fit into the family dynamic you could play with the concept of them being given new responsibilities/chores. It could be framed like a kid being assigned new chores as they reach certain ages or maturity/trust levels with the guardian. Almost like a right of passage. The social expectation would be for the MC to proudly take on these new responsibilities in order to help out their family. These tasks could gradually become more questionable and rack up to a point where being asked to kill someone wouldn't be totally bizarre. I think this would leave you with plenty of room to fit in humor along with the darker aspects!

[LunarScyphozoa]

That seems like a really REALLY interesting narrative! So much suspense and drama..

[chestnutriceeee]

That is pretty funny. You say that the MC is the mother's long-lost son, so they are not really amnesiac, right?

Also, if the "my mother is in danger" element gets overused. Since they doesn't exactly remember her, could it be possible to create some misunderstandings where the MC ends up doubting their mother and go through a constant internal tug of war? Just putting it out there~

Lastly, you mention getting help in your replies... what help are you specifically looking for?

[crimson_mystery_cake]

Have you seen Jojo’s Bizarre adventure?? Kinda a spoiler for a really old manga series but in Part 4 of Jojos the bad guy who is this serial killer that wants to live a nice normal quiet life basically face swaps with this guy who already has a wife and kid, and the wife doesn’t suspect that her husband is a completely different person and is actually really happy with the change in personality, but the kid is immediately sus of their “dad” and basically goes to investigate why their father is acting different, so yeah that sort of reminds me of what you just described. That also basically kind of sort of almost happens with the amazing spider-man when doc ock tries to marry aunt may.

[DokiDokiTsuna]

That is pretty funny. You say that the MC is the mother's long-lost son, so they are not really amnesiac, right?

I'm not sure I understand the question...MC is amnesiac in that he doesn't remember his family (that's why he's been long lost). He's reunited with his mother because she went to look for him.

Since they doesn't exactly remember her, could it be possible to create some misunderstandings where the MC ends up doubting their mother and go through a constant internal tug of war?

I dunno...she does have a lot of photo evidence (and I mean a LOT). ^^; I don't think I want the idea that she could actually be his mother to be a point of dispute.

Lastly, you mention getting help in your replies... what help are you specifically looking for?

Just this:

I can see them forming a sort of dysfunctional parent-child relationship (MC would have to manage it somehow, in order to keep his mother alive...) and I'm just wondering what interesting things I could do with that.

That also basically kind of sort of almost happens with the amazing spider-man when doc ock tries to marry aunt may.

Is that in the new animated series?? Dang, I kinda wish I could've seen that~ XD