Tell Me a Joke I Want to Laugh or Read My Joke if You Want to Laugh

jkb4753 2021-04-22 15:22:25 UTC #15

That's definitely something I would do! I always laugh at my own jokes, too. Sometimes I can't even tell the whole thing without laughing. Totally useless.

caelinalexis 2021-04-22 17:34:27 UTC #16

badum tsss * HAHAHA as a band student I appreciate and love this joke

caelinalexis 2021-04-22 17:35:51 UTC #17

that actually happened i made the mistake of telling it to someone who's laugh is contagious and we both ended up trying to tell our other friends and I'd be surprised if we even got out a coherent sentence, lol

BlunderingAlbatross 2021-04-22 18:06:37 UTC #18

I went to the zoo the other day and they only had one animal, a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu.

caelinalexis 2021-04-22 18:08:07 UTC #19

PLEASE IM SCREAMING this is so good

BlunderingAlbatross 2021-04-22 18:10:07 UTC #20

Glad I could help

Yulek 2021-04-22 18:12:10 UTC #21

a classic so you probably already know it but still my favourite.

What do you call a fake noodle?

An Impasta!

caelinalexis 2021-04-22 18:14:52 UTC #22

HAHAHA i actually haven't heard this one, all I've been hearing is Yo Momma jokes from my dad and brother -- precisely why I need better comedy outlets TT what in the bloody hell did i just make WHY IS THEREA PI SIGN?!

jkb4753 2021-04-22 18:15:27 UTC #23

Omg, that's me! I can't help it? I think about funny stuff and I laugh!

liaroger 2021-04-22 18:15:29 UTC #24

Well then, more music jokes.

What's Beethoven's favourite fruit?

BANANANAAAAAAA!!

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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a tuba glue.

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How does a soprano sing a scale?

Do Re Mi Me Me Me Me Me!

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Knock knock.
Who's there?
Philip Glass.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Philip Glass.
Knock knock.
...

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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear.

caelinalexis 2021-04-22 18:17:15 UTC #25

PLEASE THE SOPRANOS im deceased HAHAHA

liaroger 2021-04-22 18:18:30 UTC #26

How many sopranos does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one. She holds the lighbulb and the world revolves around her.

caelinalexis 2021-04-22 18:19:43 UTC #27

HAHAHA THESE ARE GOLD, hold on gotta grab my inhaler if i want to keep laughing

liaroger 2021-04-22 18:24:47 UTC #28

What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A flat major.

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How do you make a bandstand?

You take away the chairs.

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What's the difference between a conductor and God?

God doesn't think he's a conductor.

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Why did Mozart get rid of the chickens?

They kept saying "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

Yulek 2021-04-22 18:25:14 UTC #29

I feel encouraged to make dumb jokes.

Why do depressed ghosts ride the elevator?

To lift their spirits!

Recently I've bought a Thesaurus.
It had a beautiful cover and looked really thick.

But when I got home and opened it, I found out that all the pages were blank!

I have No Words to describe how angry I am!

Why do Ants not go to Church?

Because they are insects!

Will glass coffins ever be a success?

Remains to be seen!

also this gem that my english teacher showed us like ... 10 years ago?

.
.
same with this one ... I did not know this one was by domics. heck. this has been on my harddrive for a decade

caelinalexis 2021-04-22 18:29:03 UTC #30

NOT THE CHAIRS AND THE CONDUCTOR!!! im shrieking, i should be quiet me mom's in a zoom meeting T_T

caelinalexis 2021-04-22 18:30:33 UTC #31

PLEASE STEP LADDER these are too good im in pun and joke heaven rn

liaroger 2021-04-22 18:30:49 UTC #32

I have to admit I didn't know all of these (some but not all), I actually googled music jokes and found a whole Liszt.

Yulek 2021-04-22 18:32:14 UTC #33

also this one.

caelinalexis 2021-04-22 18:33:25 UTC #34

i am deceased. i am going to meet Cheesus