The Sun & The Moon

[desarayfountain01]

https://tapas.io/series/The-Sun-And-The-Moon

Hi! I'm new to publishing to Tapas, but I have been a user/reader for awhile now. I wanted to start writing my own story, and have always had this idea of The Sun/Moon concept. It would mean a lot to me if you read it, and left a comment with your thoughts or just liking it so I know it is something others are interested in. And maybe if you actually enjoy the story you can subscribe. Anyway thanks for reading this if you do>3
~Love E

[lauragarcia511]

Hello!
I just subbed to your, seem sot be a fun concept can't wait to see what happens in the story.
I also have a story on Tapas as well.

Knights of Geomora | Tapas

[_tastycheez]

I hope you don't take my feedback harshly. There was a part in your story where it was like a god/goddess. That gives a really informal feeling to your otherwise formal sounding beginning. Instead of that maybe try, there was a god and a goddess. Other than that I really enjoyed it and will continue reading
Here's my story if you don't mind checking it out.

Angel Keepers | Tapas

[carafox2121]

Hi there!

I love the concept of the sun and moon. And as I read what you have so far, it reminded me of a bit of mythology (I can't remember which, at the moment) when the sun and moon had a hard time meeting, but I'd be curious to see where this goes! Also, I do think using "god/goddess" is a little awkward. It might flow a little better if you used the word "deities" instead?

I hope this was helpful!

-Cara

[desarayfountain01]

I will be sure to check yours out as well
Thanks>3

[desarayfountain01]

Totally fine with criticism, I will check out your story as well.
Thanks>3

[desarayfountain01]

Hi! Yes I actually did not know of the mythology story, my brother actually mentioned it to me last night lol. Also thanks for the word to substitute i was looking for a better way to word it actually:)

Thanks>3

[carafox2121]

Nice! haha! I'm glad I could help. Good luck with your story!