Tragic Backstories, so cliche!

[PrncssPscs]

I think my story fits in with the classic cliche of tragedies...

[yozhikisblue]

I think there are a lot of great responses in this thread, most of which I agree with (this topic really interests me in general). But one thing that perhaps also bears mentioning is that sometimes an "angsty tragic backstory" can seem unrealistic not because it's something that has never happened, but rather because the person responding to it in that way hasn't experienced that particular kind of hardship in their life. I say that because I've often seen people insist that a character who experiences, say, a childhood full of tragedy, is unrealistic, only to discover that they are a proxy for the writer's own experiences, or that of people close to them.

A struggling, but nonetheless wise person I used to know once told me (paraphrasing from another language) "Sometimes I think about how my life would make a great tragic novel- but everybody loves to read about tragic heroes and nobody wants to know one in real life."

With that in mind, for every person who cringes away at the thought of "another tragic backstory", there's someone out there who may be silently connecting to that story, because more often than not, people with real life "tragic backstories" never get a chance to share their experiences for fear of burdening the people around them, or turning them away. They try, more than anything else, to appear as "normal" to the surrounding world as possible.

So if you are thinking beyond plot devices to the effect that your story could have on readers who have gone through the things you're writing about (assuming these are not things you've experienced directly yourself) - good for you. That's a very noble instinct. It suggests to me that you are already not the type of writer to incorporate difficult topics for the sake of shock value.

My advice would be to read through the personal accounts of people who have been through these experiences. Multiple accounts, preferably, from different perspectives- and then sit down and think for a while about how that relates to your characters and the story you want to tell. Also, perhaps accept that somebody out there isn't going to agree with your depiction. They may even get quite angry about it. That's practically inevitable. Especially because people who have been hurt once too often in their lives are also more likely to have a visceral emotional response to certain things that they find difficult to control. Usually, this isn't personal. But doing your best matters, and depicting difficult topics in a sympathetic, genuine way will mean a lot to somebody else. It's certainly better than avoiding them altogether- because whenever somebody out there brings out their hot take on "tragic backstories are tired and cliche" there's another person listening- someone with a real life tragic backstory- who hears that and thinks their voice doesn't matter.

[PrncssPscs]

Definitely so true! When writing I try to stay away from those types of situations but sometimes it's hard and it feels like your story falls downhill. It's levels to it honestly...

[Zhengo]

Honestly IMO the reason some tragic backstories don't captivate me is because of either two things:

1. The backstory is just used to make the character more interesting and the character's personality in the present isn't affected at all by their past.

2. The backstory does affect the character's personality, but it only affects them in that they are constantly the generic kind of "emo"(i.e. emotionless, gloomy, aloof, self-pitying, hates everything). And they don't grow from this emo personality. Even worse when their only personality is "emo".

[Luminosophy]

But one thing that perhaps also bears mentioning is that sometimes an "angsty tragic backstory" can seem unrealistic not because it's something that has never happened, but rather because the person responding to it in that way hasn't experienced that particular kind of hardship in their life. I say that because I've often seen people insist that a character who experiences, say, a childhood full of tragedy, is unrealistic, only to discover that they are a proxy for the writer's own experiences, or that of people close to them.

I wanted to quote this because I noticed this attitude even in online debates. Especially regarding mental health. "You can't have had [X illness/ experience] because you don't agree with me on how it feels/ how to go about improving it." I developed an analogy for it. Two people read the same book. One comes out an Atheist, the other, a Christian.

People can have the same experiences and still come out with vastly different opinions on how bad/ neutral/ good it was and how best to resolve it or prevent it from ever happening, and I think understanding that is one of the most useful tools a writer could ever have to craft some really gripping plots. I think my favourite animes were ones were, the protags and villans were trying to solve the same problem because of the same issue they experienced. But they came to radically different conclusions and outlooks which is what caused the tension in the first place.

[hushicho]

I'd just suggest making them organic to the characters. If you think of them as people you might know and put yourself in the story, that will probably make it easier to see if you're doing a good job pulling it off or if you might need to tweak a thing here or there!

I've noticed, honestly, as I've grown older and experienced more things in life -- plenty of which were sad -- I tend to seek that out less in my intake of fantasy. I've also noticed that, more times than not, people aren't really forthcoming about sad things they've lived through, because most of the time, we don't want to remember the worst times of our lives. It's something that is usually reserved for people who know each other very, very well to share unhappy times or times of difficulty.

And part of this is because of the problematic tendency of people to tell others to just "get over it" and the like, as if that just solves everything. It doesn't!

But single events, even things over a period of time, don't define us as people. Even if we lost someone dear to us, life goes on and so must we. Even if we endured abuse in a relationship, it may inform future interactions and relationships, but it doesn't mean that one thing defines us. It can change us, develop us, and contribute to who we become, but it is almost never the be-all and end-all for any person, so it shouldn't be for a character either. The person whose lover has to die to motivate them to oppose the antagonist was always a little lazy, if you think about it.

It's also important, I think, to ask if it adds something to the narrative or takes it away. It should be right for the tone you're setting in the present story, it should help to develop the character, and it should match the tone you want for them. If the story is a high-octane action narrative, a tragic backstory will serve a different purpose than one appearing in a horror tale.

One of the most unfortunate qualities of tragedy in backstory tends to be that it's often (mis)used to justify an otherwise unsympathetic or flimsy character's existence in a "shorthand" attempt to draw sympathy or identification from an audience. It's very common in the often-criticized author insertion characters that frequently pop up in fanfiction, so audiences have become a little quick on the trigger to assume that something is a cliche in that application, when it may not be.

As some others have pointed out, the most important thing is the story you're trying to tell. There's a difference between a trope and a cliché, but it can also be a very, very fine line!

[drac]

I've always just gone into writing to.. get it out. It's something I've always done. I think it would be different if I was writing solely to make it a career, instead, it's therapy, in a sense. I'm not trying to convince you of this way of thinking, or trying to say that what my characters experience is going to be the same as you or how you write. I have written/deleted this post maybe 4 times because writers trying to criticize other writers is very, very hard, and you only ever hear of successful writers giving their praise to books they did like. So what of the ones they didn't relate to? At most, I'd speak up to someone about spelling, grammar, or punctuation. But how they tell their story - whether it be an argument, joy, trauma, relief, it came from you. I can't say I'm in any position to tell you to do otherwise.

I also try and surround myself with viewpoints. I am not a woman, I can try and think like one, imagine what I would do as one, but I am not one. So, I'll reach out to my friends and family and say if this were you, in this position, what do you think? Or trauma, or the joy of marriage, or birth, aging beyond my years. It's still your method of directing the story, with just some noncommittal advice.

But that's just how I write. Tragedy can be difficult even if you've experienced it / are suffering from it / resolved it / or just want to get in the mind of someone that has that in their past. Tragedy doesn't always have to be resolved, either. It can be.. a part of your characters as they make their way through the story. It doesn't have to define them, I guess is my point.

Unless you want it to, then write 'em as dark as you want, woo!

[Wumbl]

The trick is to keep it real - the character's backstory should have shaped their personality and their decisions later in life. A character who's had a terrible sad past should feel and read like someone who has experienced those tragedies. Their personality should be molded by it partially. A character who's had some kind of awful and violent thing happen in their childhood will likely be quite affected by that event. They might be a little more anxious or have irrational fears because of it. Maybe they have post-trauma mental disorders. Tragic backstories only seem cliche'd when they're not relevant enough to the character. Nobody will take a character seriously if they've got this intense and tragic backstory but they're very normal and cheerful and don't even seem bothered by it. (unless there's a reason for that such as an existing mental disposition that causes the indifference)

A backstory can be as dark as you want so long as it makes sense.

[DiegoPalacios]

Nobody will take a character seriously if they've got this intense and tragic backstory but they're very normal and cheerful and don't even seem bothered by it. (unless there's a reason for that such as an existing mental disposition that causes the indifference)

Agreed. Is important that their reaction feels realistic to the situation. Some people may be in denial after a traumatic event, but if that denial is not explored they may come as indifferent.

In the same way, some character overreacting to the situation. "My BFF ate my last cookie....i will trust NO ONE ever again" will come of as whiny.

[scythe]

Wonderfully put. Couldn't agree more.

[Wumbl]

(also I just wanna add you can't really offend someone by portraying their situation - representation is actually good coming from someone who experienced parental abuse cough cough)

[monotone_ink]

As long as the tragic backstory creates more depth in the character and causes more intricate and interesting discourse in the present, it's all good.
Try not to use them as shock factor - unless you're trying to do something interesting with that, like a meta commentary or something, to which I'd say go for it. Just make sure it doesn't come across as dishonest.

[charliesackett]

The problem with this happens when a writer doesn't understand the effects of trauma on the human psyche. It's not just a footnote that makes a character 'edgy' or 'mysterious' or whatever it is people think it does. So if you're going to write a traumatized character, they need to have evidence of their trauma in their personality and behavior. Even if it was a long time ago and there has been therapy and medication involved, even that moulds a characters behavior.

For example, my mom got in head on collision when I was 16. Understandably, she is now a nervous driver. Even over a decade later. Even after taking defensive driving lessons to help her feel better about driving again.
So now she definitely CAN drive and she's mostly okay about it, but you can still plainly see the effects. She doesn't drive unless she has to, she'll let her fiance drive any time they go somewhere together, she avoids driving on highways, at night, in rain, in snow, etc.

So basically just think about aaaaaaaaalllll the ramifications for your character and their experience and you'll be fine