Tragic Backstories, so cliche!

[indigodrawing]

A couple of characters in the story I'm working on have "tragic backstories". (Don't worry, most characters are going to come from fairly healthy families so it's not going to be an angst-fest!)

Basically one was in an abusive unloving relationship with her parents, a situation only exacerbated by her discovery of other girls instead of boys when puberty set in) ultimately leading to her being disowned and kicked out as a teenager, and raised by an uncle. The other was bullied by his parents and left with no self-confidence as a result of it.

The elephant in the room is that such things have been done to death to such an extent that people will often react to them by rolling their eyes and saying "Oh great, another angsty tragic backstory". Worse than that, there are people out there who may have actually gone through such an upbringing and would be offended or hurt by an author bringing it up.

Have you got any advice on writing such backstories without coming across as cliche or insulting to what is a very real issue some people have had to deal with?

[Jenny-Toons]

Usually, these things are called cliches when there's:

A) Not a lot of development for the characters (and that goes for the abuser and the abused). It's always a focus on the how it happens, but never really a why it happens or the aftermath.

For example, how does your first character interact with others? Does she have an outgoing front to hide an insecure personality? Did she develop a strong relationship with her uncle and loathe her parents? Does she feel jealous of other people who have good relationships with their parents? And for her parents -- what is their logic behind their abuse? Granted, in real life, abusers can and will abuse for no good reason at all, but in their mind, it's all logical. How do they think when it comes to this abuse?

B) Adding Topics for Shock Value. I'm talking about adding very serious, very uncomfortable topics (including, but not limited to, sexual assault, self-harm, suicidal thoughts, etc.). A lot of fanfics and original stories do this -- you see a character who has a very violent backstory, and it feels like there's no real reason for all of it. Or rather, no matter what happens to them, they draw in bad people and bad things happen to them. And then often enough, there's little research done in handling those topics.

In terms of this, doing research is your best friend. It's good to acknowledge that these things also become a grey area because again, people can react differently to tragedy in their lives and will interact with those and cope in different ways.

I don't think Tragic backstories are cliche. If it's well-written and you can relate to the character, you're all good. But when it's there for shock value and doesn't add to the development of the story or the characters, that's when you have a problem.

[indigodrawing]

Hi Jenny, thanks for the input!

The first character generally tried to be cheerful because she feels like she has a lot of catching up to do on that front, but she's also quite clingy and insecure and fears losing people she loves. Normally she can keep a lid on those traits but they do manifest from time to time. She is quite fond of her uncle and shares some of his hobbies (most notably video games) and has no relationship at all with her parents. Said parents used religion as their reason but that was honestly really just an excuse for domineering behaviour.

The second character had the misfortune to be the child of a parent with mental health issues which led to the parent in question exhibiting utterly illogical behaviour. He's very scarred by it and doesn't even have the recourse of knowing there was a reason for it, or that there was somebody to blame, because there really wasn't a reason and the mental issues in question meant that the parent can't be held responsible for their actions. He's grown up to be very standoffish and confrontational. He's always waiting for the other boot to drop.

The first scenario is just something I'm concocting from my imagination but I have personal experience of the second (and no, I don't really want to elaborate!)

There is a third character who also had his challenges (he's got a genetic condition that makes him stick out like a sore thumb and results in some disabilities such as impaired vision) so he did suffer with bullying but he did also have a fairly happy family life with loving (if slightly overprotective) parents and friends. He's also got his scars but he's got plenty of happy memories as well as unhappy ones.

[Kann]

It's cliche only when it's used to shock readers and has no meaning to the plot. Someone might be offended or hurt only if such things are handled in a really unsensitive and uneducated way. So research is your best friend and you can add trigger warnings if you feel you're touching some very serious topics.

Personally I roll my eyes if a character's life is full of misfortune and traumatic events and not even one good thing that happened to them to balance things a little. It seems unrealistic to the point I can't really feel bad for that character.

[Luminosophy]

"Oh great, another angsty tragic backstory".

Everything in the history of ever is a trope. The only time I find I do this as a reader is when it's so painfully obvious the author chose it just because "it'd be cool", or just trying to garner instant sympathy points for the character. You can also tell when the author was intending to write something meaningful but just didn't quite have enough experience to execute it properly. So I wouldn't really stress /too much/ about it other than just trying your best, honestly. Some food for thought: No one ever really comes out of these scenarios a pure angel. Kids with rough upbringing can show a lot of immaturity and might even rebel against foster parents who are trying to do right by them. Even just as a result of residual programming from the previous failed parental relationship. I spent a lot of time in youth homes and other women's homes and was able to witness some interesting personality variants that resulted from abuse.

One kid was given a punching bag and he was going savage on it, beating it and crying at the same time. He had some major anger issues from physical abuse and he just needed something to vent on. It was pretty terrifying to watch. Another kid who I made friends with, he was only 16 but showed incredible self awareness where he straight up admitted to me that he caused problems for his mother and didn't want to go back to live with her because he felt like a burden. (Though he probably was harder on himself than necessary, maybe his mother didn't think of him that way.) What I find to be unrealistic (cliche) is when the character is given this history but then they're treated as if they're completely unaffected by it and they seemingly form new friends and a new life with relative ease, as if their history was a distant memory or something that never fundamentally affected their view of themselves or their world. This is when it's clear to me that the author doesn't know what they're doing.

You don't just send your character to war and then have them magically healed 100% the next day.

[TimCaloweh]

It depends how you show it. It's very easy to ruin the mood by showing trauma the way it's been shown many times before. But if you find the right angle, you just might be able to strike a tune that works. Add the circumstances surrounding the issue and the meaning the story is working towards, you might be able to create some momentum till the end. The key is subtlety vs shock. Find the balance.

[Hodge]

Hmmm I suppose everyone in my story has some sort of tragic backstory. I believe the life of a human being is just essentially tragic, so it kinda just seeps into my story haha. What matters for the storytelling is how one delivers it. Sometimes it's just clear that it was done poorly or in an immature fashion. However, when done well it can greatly humanize a character and relate to something deep within the reader. If one of my readers ever told me they cried because they related with the shame, grief, regret, desperation, frustration, despair, etc., of my characters well . . . I'd be pretty happy lol.

One thing I try to do is humanize the characters as much as possible. I try not to victimize the character in an overly superficial way, and avoid antagonizing characters to the point where they are basically evil monsters rather than human beings (unless they are meant to be monsters). Readers often enjoy well developed villains. Also, and I know it sounds childish, but suffering is relative. Often people can't help but rank degrees of suffering, so it may be something to take into account.

Another thing is I don't lay it out all at once or too quickly. I might hint it here or there, but I wait for the right moment to reveal it. The timing is usually done to flow or contrast with some event in the story. Usually, I'm going for that moment when the reader will think "ooohhhh that's why x behaves/thinks like that." For example, in romance one I often see is something like a tsundere like character that refuses to fall in love, and it's later revealed because of their previous relationship ended badly. A non-romance example is Sweet Home, where early on they establish an unlikable (but not too unlikable) mc but hints at a time when he was actually a good guy. This makes the reader notice the contrast and personality change, and keeps them reading so they can know what tragedy occurred that changed him. It will probably revealed way later in the climax of his redemption arc.

[scythe]

Remember that you're writing a story, a narrative, you're not documenting real life. You need a beginning, middle and end, you need stakes, tension, curveballs, twists, all that fun stuff.

Tragic backgrounds are often necessary to make it believable that someone would act in a certain way, and to give the story gravitas. I guess you could have a story where the protagonist has led a carefree life and it's their world which is undergoes a tragedy, but either way the end result is the same, there needs to be adequate motivation to move the narrative along.

Merely portraying something won't insult anyone who's gone through similar things, that is, if you don't intentionally portray it in such as way to insult those people.

Similarly, tropes aren't cliches, they're narrative shorthand and are best when they represent something innately human that we can all understand and sympathise with. They don't become cliche unless writers make them cliche. If your characters are real, fully fleshed out people with backgrounds that make sense, you shouldn't have that problem.

[A-weird-girler]

When your main character also has a tragic backstory

[A-weird-girler]

What if their life was average until these things?

[hjfsdh2222]

How about a sibling or a foster parent or a teacher or a neighborhood kid or a grandparent? It doesn't always have to be the parents fault:/

I usually do the "evil by nature" kind of thing for my "bad guys". For my good guy tragic backstories, Ill usually kill off a parent or two just to make em feel nice and alone, just for circumstance not too dramatic where they get all attached and watch em die. Then Ill create a childhood circumstance that makes em how they are, like familial pressure or financial pressure or slavery or racism(its nice to write in historical time periods:3).

Suggestions: Instead of abusive parents for the girl how about parents that were too young when they had a just didn't really care about her. More neglectful than abusive. Then the uncle comes in and see her all crying and sad and her parents not concerned at all, so he offers to take the kid sense he knows the parents dont care and so the parents let him take the kid. It's still unloving and harmful but not to harsh it's "eww" or "meh"
For the boy how about just the neighborhood kids and the dad bully him but not the mom(if he has a mom). Not everybody needs to pick on him for him to lose his self confidence. Or how about the has a super-awesome brother or childhood friend who is good at everything and he isn't so he feels worthless in comparison. That's actually pretty realistic, I have heard a lot of people say things like that about their siblings.

Sorry if my suggestions are too specific or not helpful but maybe it can give you some ideas.

[djwaglmuffin]

Well...in reality, the backstory is a plot device that you don't HAVE to bring up unless it is pertinent in the overall narrative going forward.

If your characters act a certain way and are questioned on it, you can have them explain it and present challenge or acceptance based on that interaction but...nobody said you HAD to say anything about it.

Now, if something central to the plot happened in the backstory IE: Batman ultimately BECAME Batman because of the injustice he faced at the hand of a criminal/failing of law enforcement/vengeance, then yeah. Now we're telling a coming of age story or origin story or something where, yeah, the events of the past have more merit on the future.

But...you first need to figure out what sort of story you're telling.

Are we character driven, plot driven, setting driven? Are you character's internal angst stemming from the nature vs. nurture trope? Do your characters treat other people like crap because THEY were treated like crap? (vicious cycle?) Can your plot be adjusted and will the outcome be the same?

Do some "What if" exercises; take your characters through some plot points like: How much would character A change if I said their parents DIDN'T abuse them?

What would happen if character B did this instead of what I originally intended?

And yeah, I agree with everyone else, here. Cliche is a moment in the story when you find yourself rolling your eyes. A character can have a tragic backstory in lots of different stories out there and I promise, the ones you DIDN'T notice are not the problem stories.

I'll just say: tell the story you want to tell. If you characters need all of that challenge in their backstory to temper them for whatever they are about to face, then so be it but if it's there "just because" then, yeah, you're gonna have a problem.

[Draconic]

Have you got any advice on writing such backstories without coming across as cliche or insulting to what is a very real issue some people have had to deal with?

Imagine that your story is a pizza.
Cliches/Tropes are ingredients for your pizza.

So, you want to make a pizza from scratch. What would you do?
You use all the ingredients and follow the instructions. That's all.

What made your pizza good is your cooking skill, not your ingredients.

"Oh great, another angsty tragic backstory".

"Oh great, another pizza! I hope this will taste good!"

You know the new videogame "Detroit: Become human"?
That games story is super cliché, illogical, unrealistic and predictable. The twisted ending is just to have it, extremely lame. But somehow that game is still enjoyable thanks to its way of storytelling.

Anything has the basic, you need to learn Anatomy and Perspective for drawing, and Storytelling for Writing. As long as your storytelling skills are good enough, you can use any cliches you want and your story still be good.

[Stardust-clearwater]

I think that part of what makes a tragic backstory boring and cliche is that its not acknowledged or noted by anyone other than whoever is narrating the story. Things like that are like massive boulders, which when dropped, cast huge shadows and leave serious damage. there should be a cause and react from the tragedy.

Ill use my old fanfic as an example.

My story was about two girls who lost their mother when they were very young. Their father didnt take the death of the mother well at all and took to gambling and drinking to make ends meet. Then gave up and tried to sell them off as slaves to pay his debts thinking he'd win enough money to buy them back later.

cut to the middle where they get adopted by a loving family but years have passed since then and the older sister got parentified while the younger one has been equal parts neglected and spoiled by her older sister. Both of them have a host of behavioral issues that make them an absolute nightmare to anyone but their immediate family expecially a serious abandonment complex , trust issues, and a violent streak. Their past continues to affect them because you dont go from being street rats to being nice civilized kids after some papers get signed.

Another instance would be the outsiders. where the death of the parents means the eldest of the Curtis brothers cant go to college, which in turn makes him very hard on his youngest brother because he is bright and capable and definitely can. Which in turn causes friction because nobody appreciates being pressured by anything.

so sum up everything, tragic back stories should echo through the main story either through the character/s it affects or through the people who find out about it.

[lunaartemisasama]

As long as the story is interesting it doesn't matter so much. I mean almost everyone in shonen anime are orphans or raised by their grandparents.
I just hope there's character development. That's all.

[indigodrawing]

Lots of good and interesting advice here! Will take a while to work through it all.

[Kann]

I should specify I meant misfortune from birth to present. My bad. XD But average life then life taking turn for worse is still thing that happens and is believable.

(Not saying if someone irl had only bad things happen to them is lying or overdramatizing. It's just how hard it is to make this look believable in fiction.)

[Rosso]

cliches do not always have to be a bad thing. as long as they are not just done for shock-value, lazy resolve/answer, sob-story ONLY to make a character likable, or meaningless to the story (or character in question) overall.

as long as you implement them well, and the "cliche stories" have actual consequences (cause and effect, a drastic change of personality due to this and that...etc) then you shouldn't worry about it at all.

as for your example, i don't have much to say about it except as long as you have good intentions and not doing things tastelessly, you'll be fine.

[travelercomic]

There are characters in my Dreamwalker Felix comic that have tragic backstories, but I feel they make sense within the world they're in. Even if some people consider it cliche... well it's a cliche based in reality. Reality is tragic. Now if your entire story is one big angst fest then yeah you may need to go back to the drawing board. Watchmen is chalk full of tragedy, but it's important to look deeper into the story to realize that the author was almost making the exact opposite statement than the tragic one that's on the surface level. That good human kindness is alive and well and these super powered characters just aren't able to see that.

So it partly depends on your intention and what you do with it.

With my comic, there is definitely a running theme in the story of how our social ties to our friends, and the parenting of ones guardians especially, will effect how someone grows up. As such, there are examples of good families and examples of very bad dysfunctional families. There's also ghosts and stuff so.... yeah a bit of tragedy.

[AVXP]

The only point I would add- is that it's highly (un)realistic to find someone who is both comfortable and driven. Doesn't happen, really. Something needs to push your characters- and usually those that take the most risks and push the hardest are running from something.

There's a lot of day dreaming about being something or somewhere.
Lots of people trying to find the spirit to get things done.

When you're desperate and it's do or die, you don't have time to ask for help- you're too busy getting down to the business of survival. That's pretty much what makes heroes and villains.

People who are chillin tend to stay chillin.
And they certainly don't make for interesting characters in the center of the action.