What does jealousy look like for you?

keii4ii 2017-01-11 23:47:09 UTC #8

I feel you 100% :'D For me, when things get that bad, art is never the real cause despite what it may seem like. It's only the outlet.

miesmud 2017-01-11 23:56:31 UTC #9

I get jealous when I see artists that are younger but are more skilled than me. Feels rough and the older I get, the more there are. I'm especially jealous on their dedication to work hard and practice even though they're so young. Makes me feel like I'm lazy and wasted my youth.

Shanny8 2017-01-12 00:02:51 UTC #10

For the most part, I try not be jealous and look at critical reasons for whatever I might be going through or the reasons why I might be experiencing some form of turmoil...but then, I dont know- not sure if it's jealousy or not, but sometimes I feel like the deck is stacked against me. I know part of it could logically be one thing, but then I feel there's this major bias or hate- that someone or something has it out for me, so I flop back & forth between trying to persevere and trying not to have a complete breakdown.

agentfink 2017-01-12 00:23:11 UTC #11

I wouldn't say it's jealously (more annoying than anything) but it's when I see a comic who hasn't updated in forever, constantly gaining more subs. To try and not be concerned about the numbers is a is a lie to myself. I'm happy where I'm at but if I want my readership to grow that needs to be reflected in the subs... which brings me back to being annoyed with comics that don't update.

SleepingPoppy 2017-01-12 00:24:43 UTC #12

Absolutely. So much of it is anxiety and fear about other things.

Michelle 2017-01-12 01:32:43 UTC #13

Aaa, jealousy is such a pain :< I don't sweat it too much when comics or styles I personally don't like become hugely popular, because I've always felt like an outlier on what people like. What mainly gets me is when I see my male peers get better jobs and form closer relationships in the art world than me.
For a while I strived to get in at a certain studio, but after getting told "Not good enough" after multiple attempts while watching several of my male peers get accepted, I said fuck it and focused on my freelance career.

Though I try not to dwell on my gender too much, because it sometimes sounds like a cop out, I can't help but feel I'd have more opportunities if I was "one of the boys".

demthorshie 2017-01-12 02:40:55 UTC #14

I'm generally not a jealous person. For example, if I see comic artists who have better art skills than I do plus a ton of subscribers, it usually sparks a flame of inspiration in me and kind of acts as a reminder of where my personal goals and priorities for my own art should be. The artist clearly worked hard to gain a huge following and sacrificed a lot of their own time to create such awesome art, so, it's hard to be jealous at that!

But I would have to say that the one thing that grinds me gears whenever I see it is when I browse the Staff Picks. I see those handfuls of comics that have been featured that only have 1 page and the creator hasn't updated the comic in more than 1 to 2 weeks, when there are hundreds of comics created by equally skilled artists who put in the work and post episodes regularly that never see the light of day. I wouldn't say that makes me jealous, more so annoyed.

Kayke 2017-01-12 02:43:31 UTC #15

@Michelle I totally feel that on the studio thing... I did story board tests for a show I really wanted to work on but didn't get the position and then I totally instagram stalked the people who did get the boarding jobs... and they were mostly guys (despite the fact the show was aimed at a female audience) and I shifted gears to focus more on comics than trying to get into the animation game.

Other than that. I guess I get jealous of people who seem to have a lot of free time? When I see friends who are working day jobs and doing a ton of freelance but still manage to have time to go to parties and take weekend trips I'm baffled. I feel like I have to spread myself so thin just to finish what I have to so I really wish I had more down time to relax and hang out!

Michelle 2017-01-12 06:21:21 UTC #16

Ah yeah, same here! I was applying as a storyboard artist to various animation studios. I used to want to be in animation really badly but, like you, I've found indie comics to be a lot more inclusive to female artists. I do get to storyboard for live action, but even there, the roster of artists I work among is like 90% male :u In any case, who knows; maybe we'll sneak our ways into the animation world eventually.

haleymewsome 2017-01-12 07:08:01 UTC #17

@Kaykedrawsthings @Michelle I've run into this a ton at my school, too. For some reason, even though only about 20% of the students are male, almost all the successful alumni they bring back are guys, and I keep finding out that my male classmates are getting all these weird opportunities from the teachers and the city. Also even though the drastically higher rate of girl graduates has held steady for years my school's faculty is almost entirely men, I've only had one female teacher in my department and I've taken around 42 classes. (4 year program, 5 to 6 classes per semester, 2 semesters per year)

Thank goodness for the internet, it's not a perfect place but at least there aren't a ton of crusty old gatekeepers stopping you from putting your work out there.

But I digress, for me jealousy only really pops up when a really young artist shows up with mad skills, it's a double punch because it makes me feel elderly -and- untalented. XD But really I would never hold it against anyone, those kids are amazing and the brightness of their futures doesn't actually hurt mine so eh.

DokiraKii 2017-01-12 09:32:26 UTC #18

Most of the posts here, I can agree with a lot. I try not to get jealous or compare myself to others but when I see their success versus my own, I feel a little bitter inside. I start to blame myself, thinking "Maybe it's just me? Maybe I'm just not trying hard enough? Or too much?" It especially bothers me when I see others who just know what their doing and get results out of it so quickly or if they're younger and better than me, lol. It's a horrible feeling and it makes me shut down sometimes and think of giving up on whatever I'm pursuing. But doing that wouldn't get me anywhere, so I've been trying to cope with the insecurities by not paying attention the jealousy in the back of my mind and just keep trying. Someday, I'll be great. Just stay positive and kick out some of the negative.

J.Lovelace 2017-01-12 10:25:17 UTC #19

Speaking of jealousy towards other artists, I am jealous mostly in situations that are unfair to me. Situations that make me think "Why them, but not me?" when I feel that their success is measured by favorism and ungodly amounts of luck, when our skill/age/experience/whatever is on the same level, or theirs is lower.
It's only about the success of others, and I remember getting very agitated about the "one night wonders", aka people who got tons of popularity in a very short amount of time. When they barely upload anything for the first time and BAM - frontpage.
It pushed me to act like a baby, and I tried to avoid the wonder-artists, as in I didn't want to hear about them, I didn't want to support them in any way, even if their art and stories would definitely suit my taste.
It enraged me even more when some of them admitted that they never aimed to be that popular, they just did a thing and it was a success bomb somehow, and they didn't know how to even handle it.
Luckily it wasn't destructive envy, because I never tried to ruin anyone for their success. It was just terribly demotivating. "Why do I even try?" I said that lot to myself.

It still bugs me sometimes, but much less after I just accepted that the world was always like that, and me being salty over it won't change a thing. And I realized that having too much attention will lead to some unwanted situations too, so... I'm okay with where I am today.

xEijix 2017-01-12 13:36:40 UTC #20

Notice that they are more good at drawing and more popular make me jealous sometimes.
Usually go to a corner and cry for this and catch by brother is a habit lol.

vongcw 2017-01-12 14:33:28 UTC #21

Jealousy for me is rooted in not being happy where I'm at in the present. It's something that happens not just in art but in finances, respect, completed works, etc.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I think all the validation/explanation in my head such as, "I'm jealous because I'm a better artist, but they are more famous," or, "I'm jealous because I feel that if I had been given their opportunities I would have done as well as them," are just me trying to give a reason for the emotion to exist. But the what is really happening is simply I'm not happy where I'm at today.

And when I am good with where I am today, then neither jealousy nor rationalization occurs. So yeah, lots of inner workings for me.

KSlinger 2017-01-12 14:53:43 UTC #22

I won't go as far as to say I never feel jealous of other artists but I genuinely feel (and think?) very little about the 'competition' here and in other places. If I feel anything it's angry at myself for not doing enough- like if I see someone churning out page after page and showing loads of progress I mentally beat myself up for being slow. That's about as deep as it goes. Sometimes I don't understand why a series is popular and sometimes I get irked when the only apparent reason people follow something is for the promise of sexy stuff further down the line. That can be demoralising. But I'm not angry at the artist! I get a kind of 'well why the hell don't I just do that?' attitude then get annoyed at my own hang ups (like being too god damn shy to draw sexy/naked things when I have zero problem with that in person??). It's very frustrating.

Michelle 2017-01-12 18:40:22 UTC #23

Very true! I can't imagine how many of today's popular artists would have completely flown under the radar if not for the internet. I would have probably given up a long time ago if I had to deal with nothing but gatekeepers >u>;;

VermillionWorks 2017-01-12 18:43:48 UTC #24

The only thing I'm jealous about these days is people whose hands/arms are still intact enough that they can draw or write whenever they have spare time and not have to wonder if it's too much abuse to their limbs on top of making a comic page. XP

heterodont 2017-01-12 21:52:06 UTC #25

Very often its with people I, for a lack of better word, hate, getting more recognition than me. A while ago, said artist who i really don't like was staff picked - and proceeded to go on hiatus for a few months (essentially mid 2016 to 2017) and it made me soooo mad. I don't do much about it than grump for a bit before moving on to something else to complain about.

only once have I gotten spiteful bc of how much more skilled an artist was than me and I got mad every time they posted, but now I'm friends with them and am no longer grumpy about it.....

i genuinely don't understand myself sometimes.

sarrowsmith10 2017-01-12 22:23:01 UTC #26

My jealously doesn't come from other artists usually. Not their skill or their fans anyways. I think I don't have these jealous feelings in that regard, because I have no way of knowing if those fans or subs or numbers on a webpage translate to anything useful for that artist. VSEPR had almost no subs on smackjeeves and maybe only 2 comments, despite months of advertising. We decided to try doing a kickstarter to take it to print and to our surprise it funded in 24 hours. We got lots of amazing feedback and got our book printed and distributed. So, although I wasn't popular online, plenty of folks still thought I was good enough to invest in with their hard earned dollars. It was a humbling experience for sure.

Things I do get jealous of are when artists I know who share a similar success level in terms of books published, cons attended and general known-ness online, get invited to cons as guests. I want to be a guest so bad! I won a badge art contest and I thought that would be cool, but I was treated with a lot of hostility at the con where I won, by other artists who entered... so I can check that off my bucket list to never do again... so maybe being a guest wouldn't be the best wish, but you never know till it happens right? nervous laugh

Aspie_Gamer 2017-01-18 19:49:56 UTC #27

Hate to revive this thread, but I need to speak my piece while I'm waiting for my new drawing tablet to come in the mail (RIP old tablet of 4 years, you will be missed.) and thus am unable to otherwise work on my comic Life of an Aspie.

Jealousy is an ugly mistress for me. I've tried to distance myself from it as much as possible in the past, but there's only so long you can ignore a problem before you are forced to confront it and so for me, I get jealous at the same stuff everybody here gets jealous at.

I bust my ass to keep a buffer for LoaA going strong giving up time I would have otherwise spent playing video games. Meanwhile, another creator practically throws something mediocre (imo) together and gets instant praise from everybody and their cousin on social media.

Related to the above point, again, I stick to the grind as best I can making sure LoaA updates three times a week. Meanwhile, someone who's just starting out automatically has their success handed to them on a silver platter courtesy of a Staff Pick. Now to be fair to staff, they have seemingly gotten better as of late about not handing out staff picks like free candy to new creators especially those who really are just starting out and don't already have a strong fanbase elsewhere on the interwebs. Also, its worth pointing out that just because something's popular doesn't automatically make it good. Look at Fifty Shades of Gray. (Is it too late to rag on that piece of crap?)

And of course people around the same age as me or even younger who draw like gods in comparison to me though I'm past the point of wanting my art to look uber professional having realized that pretty art doesn't always translate to good writing, but that meh artwork can be salvaged if the writing has something going for it.