Sure thing, let's give it a try. Now, after two days passed, I'll not "scream" anymore.
During > 1.5 years of participation, I made exactly 100 topics on this forum. And I have to notice, that 70-75% of threads were related either to art (including art competitions which I hosted), or to writing (including discussion of tropes), or to Tapas website (including tech issues reports).
(I estimated it approximately by quickly re-checking the list of my threads).
And during the whole these 1.5 years, I created only
1 (one)
topic with outcry about the way, in which another discussion was shut down (pay attention: I didn't make such topics when a couple of my own threads were closed, because I didn't find them so important).
And it's only
1 (one)
topic where I wrote the same paragraph with CAPSLOCK for several times.
1 from 100.
Which means something.
The topics of loneliness, depression and suicide are very relevant to me.
I had one relative, who did it, and one close friend, who did it. And, of course, I myself literally fought with my own suicide thoughts during long periods (months, years) because of life issues and serious mental illness. So I know very well, what I'm talking about.
And what I know even better, is that finding a good therapist, who will really be able to help, is not always easy and quick task. Maybe you'll be lucky and find them instantly. But maybe you'll have to go through the long way until you'll find a doctor, who'll be able to help - especially if your case is complicated. And during all this road, full of anxiety, doubts, disappointments with bad doctors, who sometimes make things worse - a person need support of other people. And I know very well, that during this time, sincere support of any person, of any living soul - even if it's not a doctor and not even a close friend, will matter.
And know what? Even when you have a good therapist, they can't be here for you every time when you need support. Their services are costly, they have a queue of patients... for example, I sometimes have to wait for 2 weeks before getting to my doc.
Things about hotlines are even more sad... for example, read comments under this article. Look at contrast between the article itself and comments of people. In the article they write, how hotline must be in imaginary ideal world. And under it people write, how it is in reality, and how they ended up even more hurt and desperate after contacting it.
After it, maybe you'll understand, why people hesitate to refer to it. Even if there is a little chance, that it'll help, there is also a big chance, that it'll make things worse.
But of course, people, who say "find doctor, contact hotline", don't think about it. They obviously just repeat this like a mantra to take off the responsibility from themselves. Without giving a shit, what will really happen with person when they'll do it.
I wrote all above just to prove that it's not a silver bullet.
To explain a motivation, a reason, why people not always do it, and not always can get help from it. Why they may want to know, what to do otherwise.
And here we are.
Now look: here is me. The other. A creator (even if small), a reader and passionate supporter of many other creators, and, as was told above, a person, deeply personally touched by problems of loneliness, depression and suicide.
I visited this topic, and it didn't trigger me. But:
- it's closing;
-
the way, in which it was closed and
-
the followed reaction on it of several people in THIS topic -
these are things which triggered me instead. In fact, it hit me harder than any other event, happened at this forum ever.
Of course, with my background, I was interested to read that discussion. Because even despite now I'm feeling good enough to be far from it, I understand very well, that some day I may return to such state and end up in such situation, too, so it was very relevant.
Here is me. A person, who's interested in what to do, if one doesn't see sense in contacting your country's suicide prevention hotline, can't reach family and doesn't have friends.
And here you write:
"Please contact your country's suicide prevention hotline and reach out to your family and friends if you're feeling unwell."
I visited this topic to exactly find out, what to do in the situation when I can't or don't want to... and here it is.
I can easily imagine, how exactly such inhuman answer can kill somebody who came to see an answer on the question.
And here I see all these people who support this unimaginable cruelty...
I'm done here.
Of course, I will finish the current contest, give promised awards and draw OC I promised in "draw OC" topics (when I'll be morally prepared to finally finish it, bc now I don't have energy for this). But aside of this, I don't have plans to actively participate in this forum anymore.
P.S. And yes, if even, by the chance, a fear of legal issues explains closing itself, it still can't explain, neither justify this inhuman final message before closing.
