When you start seeing through your characters eyes (+ examples)

Leyelle 2024-03-27 01:51:40 UTC #1

What is a scene you hadn't thought about until you looked at the story through your character's perspective?

Personally, it didn't occur to me until a second draft of the idea for the chapter "Peekaboo" the agitation of mind Kattar would undergo going out to dinner in his wheelchair for the first time, and my female lead didn't realize it either. Seeing it through my character's eyes, it dawned on me what a big deal it would be, as this date with his crush is the first time since getting paralyzed he's gone anywhere but to his own house, his mother's house, or back to the hospital. He is miserably self conscious, and I really wanted to channel how hard this experience is for him into the scene, even though you don't get to see it through his eyes.

The moment when the female lead actually understands why he's acting the way he is is so essential.

Kattar is fidgeting uncomfortably, unnecessarily intent on his menu, but I’m sure it has nothing to do with the cantankerous kids, who at this point, are throwing themselves on the floor.

I’m also sure he’ll never tell me why, even if I ask, so I try my best to ignore it like I ignore the tantrum.

“I met my new agent today,” I say slowly, in an attempt to break the silence. He looks up abstractedly, and I can almost feel his interest fragmenting like a thousand slivers of broken glass. I only get one, and the apathy stabs me like one of Cupid’s arrows.

Kattar nods, but he’s not looking at me, glancing sideways at two giggling teenagers as they pass by whispering to each other behind their hands.

His expression is a mixture of nerves and irritation, a cloudy cocktail casting a shadow over his white face. When he looks back at me, his eyes are two lines, like he’s squinting against the sun.

Animal508 2024-03-27 15:31:05 UTC #2

I have to do it whenever I write, and it takes a ton of effort to do it. Essentially, the equivalent of method acting, and I have to do it before I release a chapter.

Leyelle 2024-03-27 15:37:45 UTC #3

most of my character's I don't have that much trouble working from the perspective of and i'm always writing through their eyes, but for my disabled characters there are little details I often don't think of until later drafts because i've never lived life the ways they have

Glofernwolfe 2024-03-27 23:07:15 UTC #4

Hmmm interesting how perspectives change when you wear your character's shoes hey? I like how it helped you write about those feelings for Kattar.

I have done this before too, but now I realise I must do it more consciously. Seems important.

Here's an example: We always knew that Zov'ha had some sort of power that allowed her to conjure frost shields, or stone claws or whatever. When I saw it through Zov'ha's perspective, I realised that any modification to her body may be painful to some extent. And what would be going through her head when this happened? And that's how I came up with this little excerpt that I'm proud of. From the chapter "Little Hellion".

Warning: Slight gore content

It was just after noon — the spring sun drifted lazily across the sky, visible over the thick canopy of trees that blanketed the Urumoi lowlands. Lying on the relatively flat surface of a boulder, Zov’ha practised rematerializing the fingernails of her right hand into sharp stonelike claws. She could feel the surface of the hard sandstone rock with her left hand. Mimicking it felt easy. It was not as hard as frost. It was simple — she thought, like giving a command. She could sense some sort of system in her body, executing her will. There were errors… like a program that she had witnessed Marana working on in her laboratory. She could fix those errors, modify the code… she could make her claws curl downwards or straight, enlarge or flatten… all the while using the hard surface of the boulder to… program her own body?

For hours, she pondered over any fragment of her memory that would give her a peek into what she really was. Amaha had told her to find answers in Neva. But going there only frightened her. The thought of finally understanding what she was… she had many theories, and to her, they all ended in her being someone she did not want to be. The people need you… Someone called Yar’cax had told her long ago. Someone from Asenya. Does he have something to do with this?

She opened her eyes and placed her right index finger on her upper canine tooth. She concentrated, feeling every grain of the stony surface with the other hand, deciphering the enigmatic pattern of the matrix… It was easy. So easy! Chaotic… unstructured.. Easy to replicate. She knew her teeth as well as she knew the back of her hand — the enamel’s smooth texture, the curve, the sharpness… I can turn it into this chaotic lattice of stone. As the simple code executed, her teeth swelled up, and her canines turned into sharp stone fangs that poked her lips. A stinging pain caused her to wince as the swelling fangs cut through her gums. She felt blood gush out as if she had bit into a ripe berry. Tasting the metallic liquid flow onto her tongue and into her throat, she sputtered, coughed, and pushed herself up. Error! Now there was bright red blood on the boulder and on her clothes, she could make out through tear-filled eyes. She noticed it was tainted with iridescent, dark — almost black — liquid. Trying to catch her breath after being choked by her own blood, she wiped the blood and saliva dripping from her mouth with the back of her hand, where her fur had regrown.

Leyelle 2024-03-27 23:15:11 UTC #5

yeah, it's interesting to thing of the feelings, be they painful, terrifying, etc that may be taking place in our characters bodies, and we have to be careful not to be disassociated from them when we write

Leyelle 2024-04-06 13:47:37 UTC #6

The leads of both my series (not my short story) are much older than me for one, and I ironically make Alicia complain about my own generation, just because it makes sense for the character. At the same time, she frets that she's already too old to live her dreams, which is actually my own feelings translated to her character.

Freeing my hair from the braid and shaking it out as I stare into the mirror, I think, I look deceptively young.

I’m only 28.

That’s not old to anyone but the Gen Zs and grade school babies who call everyone older than them “boomers,” regardless of their age.

But I don’t feel young.

Maybe it’s just because I’ve had so much horror packed into this itty-bitty life. Pack-ratted into the corners and spilling out of this itty-bitty shell.

I’m almost 29.

That feels like a long time.

And it doesn’t.

The years went slowly until they were gone.

My time is dilating.

Every Tomorrow is born as a ‘yesterday.’

And sometimes, late at night, I wonder if that’s a bad sign.

A sign it’s almost over.

Maybe the ending is always deceptively close. The older I get the less difference there is between tomorrow and next year.

I burned them all away waiting…

For him. For them. For her.

I run my fingers gently over the places the wrinkles will be the next time I blink, and wonder if I have enough time left in this castle of ice we call Life to make realities of all the things that are still only daydreams.

Leyelle 2024-04-28 13:57:07 UTC #7

I think I may have really jinxed myself by agreeing to write a chapter from the POV of one of the supporting characters in "Damsel in the Red Dress" but it'll be a good challenge none the less. I find, it's one thing to understand a chararacter's POV, and another to figure out how to write in their unique narrative voice. Sometimes things like this come naturally, other times it takes conscious thought, because just like people don't all speak the same, they wouldn't narrate the same way as each other either.

Leyelle 2024-05-05 18:23:43 UTC #8

Coming back to this now XD, it's actually been really fun writing from Kattar's POV, though it certainly takes some effort, because it's so different from Alicia's.

By @HostileFren 's suggestion, the bonus chapter will be with Kattar getting ready for he and Alicia's first date ("Ring Around the Rosy,") and that allowed me to see his point of view on his actions, and realize more depth to it I'd never thought about when I wrote it from Alicia's perspective.

It's actually kind of shocking to me now, because it seems so clear when I look at it through his eyes (spoiler: getting to understand part of his motivation behind driving her nuts by pulling her sash. no it's not just cuz he's a cat, it goes deeper lol.)

Leyelle 2024-05-22 14:34:56 UTC #9

This was definitely a factor for "Rigamarole." I can technically not justify 90% of Leia's actions concerning her little brother, but from her POV, I understand why she would do it, and it makes her sympathetic, though extremely imperfect. She lies constantly, black mails, fear mongers and so on. Sounds like she's basically a she-devil, but through her eyes, each thing has a justification, and it makes her feel realer.

She's lying to keep her parents from finding out her little brother is bulimic because she knows if they did find out, he basically wouldn't be treated like a normal person anymore, but a "case." She also knows he would never regain favor in their eyes, he'd just be a "failed attempt at raising a good kid." Just like her.
She black mails him into eating by threatening to tell their parents, because she doesn't physically have any power to make him feed himself, and force-feeding wouldn't work anyway, if she didn't consider it "more harmful." (emotional abuse or physical abuse. in the end which one is worse really?) but she thinks it's all she can do to keep him alive.
She fear mongers because she wants him to be careful and acknowledge how much danger he'll be in if their parents DO find out. It's emotional danger, but she's constantly reminding him he needs to cover his tracks. This is partially legitimate concern, and partially some bitterness, she has that seems justified in her eyes, because he accidentally spilled a secret of hers a few years back that effectively ruined her life.

I do want to look a little more through Riley's eyes to justify his actions a bit more, though I feel I've pretty easily been able to justify everyone's behaviors in their own opinions in this story. Maybe it's a little easier when you just write them first and think about it later in some contexts, but my newest story has been tripping me up lol. I'm probably just overthinking.

this is available for free for everyone to read on my Patreon Public posts

Leyelle 2024-06-11 13:42:38 UTC #10

This has been a lengthy process learning to write from Essence's perspective because the way she sees the world is so different from the way that I do. It took my a while to be able to adapt my writing style to suit the way she would describe her surroundings but I think I'm finally starting to get the hang of it. It's interesting to me the sort of things that will become stumbling blocks without me ever having realized it would be a hang up. I write lots of different emotions, and though some take a lot of drafts, writing emotions isn't much of a struggle to me, but writing no emotions?

I followed my editor's advice and I think the way it shows itself now makes a lot of sense. It's largely just tired and...empty.

I reread the novel segment three times, muttering under my breath.

I rearrange the emphasis, try to sound it out and find a way of inflecting that makes it sound more interesting than it is, but each time it just oozes more cliche.

I can’t begin to imagine how I’m supposed to clean this up without sending Miss Lay into another fit. My smallest suggestion is met with a two hour argument. The most glaring issues become soap boxes where she insists that her ‘masterpiece’ is ‘better’ with every red flag and run on sentence.

“I pray thee, my dear lady, this worthless frame needs no other nourishment than your honeyed words, and cherry-colored lips,” Tiff is reading aloud from her computer between shrieks of screamy laughter.

‘Is it possible that Caroline could use a word other than ‘stupid’ to refer to Harry’s flowers?’

I mark down a dozen awkward sentences, each line of dialog and narration that feels too ‘clunky’ when read aloud. Then, I stare at my screen and try to dismiss them.

I can’t have any more arguments.

I can’t tell if my head is thumping or burning, but I have too much work to do to do anything about that.

(this is from the first chapter of "A Dozen Morning Glories" coming out on Saturday.)

Leyelle 2024-07-08 16:48:05 UTC #11

I realized that because of Alicia's past with her mother, her boyfriend being on lots of medication was something that would probably lead to uncomfortable (to put it mildly) triggers to her, and she has one of the most violent panic attacks she's had in the story so far. I did quite a lot of research leading up to this chapter, but all the horror and shame that she feels are devastating to her as she's flooded with the memories, and I wanted to show that well, giving the readers a chance to feel the way she felt and feels, just as strongly as if it were yesterday when something triggers the memories:

Leyelle 2024-07-31 14:33:33 UTC #12

I'm fully embracing the unreliable narrator aspect of Alicia's narration at this point. She's fallible, and has a lot of trauma, so a whole lot of parts of her life she lies about so constantly, that she almost believes it, or she's forgotten entirely, but these lies begin to unravel, or her memories resurface as the story progresses

ThunderChicken 2024-07-31 15:55:49 UTC #13

I’m going beyond seeing my story through my character’s eyes and have rewritten the whole thing in a first person perspective. I’m not only seeing it through his eyes, I’m getting into his mind. And that is a really strange place to be.

Leyelle 2024-07-31 16:05:44 UTC #14

lol. that's the way my novels are written. seeing through their eyes and living in their mind are much the same thing I think

Leyelle 2024-08-21 15:02:36 UTC #15

The whole most recent chapter of "Damsel in the Red Dress" was me trying to make the experience of Alicia's depression and anxiety something the readers could feel. It's very emotional, but it's also a very clear look into her head, which i love:

I find myself sitting cross-legged on the living room floor with my head in both hands, rocking for no reason as I try to make myself focus or think.

But I can’t talk to him.

The more I try to solve the enigma - cure my empty spaces - conjure the missing piece to my broken ending the more the answers slip away from me.

I just need to wrap up a stupid lesson.

But I can’t talk to the people I’ve known for a decade without feeling like I’m doing everything wrong. How am I supposed to teach strangers?

I’m hopeless.

“Now at the end of our course together…”

No, that's not how it should go…

“As we reach the end…”

My mind begins playing “I Did It My Way” by Frank Sinatra and senseless rambles about the final curtain.

I’m panicking.

It’s not right! It’s not right!

It has to be perfect! It’s never perfect!

I bite my thumb and stare at my laptop on the paint-splattered carpet in front of me, all a mess of reds and yellows, like a whiny baby felt the need to overturn their dinner - throw it everywhere.

My mind melts a little more, and I think of Melissa and the way she talked about her husband and her son - wondering why it all feels so foreign.

There’s nothing. Nothing left. No answers. No time.

Why did I ever think I could do this?

Why did I ever think I could survive this time better than the last time? That I wouldn’t shatter and fall apart and lose my mind like the last time?

Think having a relationship with Kattar would go better than the last time-

-I tried to live and convince myself I was loved.

Leyelle 2024-09-10 15:42:19 UTC #16

This sounds weird but I had to start seeing through my characters...nose when writing Crystal Blue. The female lead has a super sense of smell, and my editor reminded me that I should emphasize smells when writing her dialog because if someone had a sense of smell that strong, smells would stick out to them way more, especially at places like malls which would be overwhelming with smells.

supriyashukla2398 2024-09-10 16:23:41 UTC #17

Just one day I couldn't sleep, then I thought about my story. I was thinking about what I should do for my next chapter, and then I suddenly started seeing through Milo's eyes. that's when I realized.

"Damn it! am I making your life tough?"

I felt sad for a second, but then I was like, "No. That's your destiny, sweetie".

Check out My BL Novel with forced mafia marriage.

Leyelle 2024-10-01 12:12:52 UTC #18

Sitting down and creating character profiles for the central characters in "Crystal Blue" has really helped me with this. It's weird how many times answering something like "character's hobby" has spiraled into a lot of detail about their emotional past and backstory, even favorite food has occasionally.

Example: Judith from "Crystal Blue" likes food like A LOT, because it's one of few pleasures she can enjoy working a top secret government job where she basically can't go anywhere for fun and works every day of the week.