I got part of one eye done before the burning set in. I tried to straighten the line anyway but ended up screaming. It hurt, but the thought that I had just blinded myself made me absolutely hysterical. Nobody was in the house at the time, so all I could do was chant "shit shit shit" while I ran around the house thinking about how stupid that was with a cold lump of toilet paper on my eye until the burning went away. Then I rubbed my eyelid raw trying to get the sharpie off before my dad got home. My eye ended up looking like a swollen anus but at least I didn't have to tell him the truth. "I got some soap in my eye."
Believe it or not, there's multiple incidents of me doing stupid things to my eyes. When I was six I kept a flashlight in my bedroom so I could stare at it. I thought I could use the poor eyesight excuse at school and force my mom to buy me some new glasses I really wanted, while also making it look like I wasn't a faker. And then about five years ago I ripped the cornea in both my eyes by taking off my contacts the wrong way and had to smear steroids on my eyes for a week, which limited my eyesight to the equivalent of looking through a greasy ziploc bag. But at least I could use that excuse at school without being a faker.
