Anyone else struggled to return after a hiatus? (Mutual support thread)

[adderfly]

Hey creators! I’m coming back to tapas after a long, unplanned hiatus. The break happened in part because I just got too busy, and in part because I have been struggling a lot lately. I’m feeling more anxiety about updating my comic than I have since the beginning or my comics journey. I’m also feeling some guilt because I didn’t just stop posting my comic— I stopped opening the app altogether. A lot of my readers are people I met in the forums, and I want to keep up with their comics and offer them support too. I also posted a thread in the forum for artists over 25 the day before my accidental hiatus started, and I feel super bad for not keeping up with that or looking at any comics shares there. Honestly I’m touched and surprised that anyone still bothered to read the episode of my comic that I just posted. Basically I’m experiencing a weird amount of social anxiety for a web comic app.

If you relate and you want a space to vent, or give and receive validation, feel free to share. As much as I’m struggling to feel like a real artist who is worthy of engagement, it’s easy to see from the outside that everyone else is, so I’m happy to extend encouragement to all of you. Lastly, if you feel like dropping a link to your comic to get back in the daunting habit of sharing, go ahead!

TL;DR post your hiatus angst here so we can all be nice to each other

(Here’s mine, btw: https://m.tapas.io/series/Dragonwood/info )

[AmysGames]

Yeah, I've been struggling a lot with motivation. I haven't updated Aiiro No Kunoichi since 2018, and every time I think about it, I'm like... do I really want to continue this comic? I don't want to give up on the characters, but maybe the story would be better told a different way?

There's another comic I've been working on too, which I think I'll have a lot more fun with, but I keep putting off working on that too just because of certain pages I don't feel like drawing. It's a vicious cycle.

But yeah, I definitely get it. I too feel awkward hanging out on these forums sometimes, given that I haven't actually uploaded a comic (or novel) anytime recently. But I figure, like, this is a passion project for most of us, and there are no rules about that. Everyone goes at their own pace, and even if that pace is super slow, there's no shame in that.

[sorin_gran]

I agree with you, without a doubt. I started mine several months ago and updated my story daily, but then I fell into the great chasm of discourage and self-cynicism. The editor inside could not stop but nitpick at everything I write. Ultimately, it ended up breaking my spirit. I simply hope I can rekindle that flame once again.

Here's my novel, btw.

Invade the Verse | Tapas

[Rhonder]

Yep! I'm in the position where I left my current comic earlier this year but don't have another idea that I want to (or am ready to) work on yet so I'm in hiatus purgatory lol. It's been nice to have a break, but I also kinda crave to make something, y'know?

Currently I'm sitting on:

• the comic i abandoned, which I have no interest in continuing.

• a follow up to my first one-shot, which is mostly drafted out but that I decided not to pursue last year for various reasons.

• a big ambitious story that needs more time in the oven, that I've been stuck on for a year and a half.

• a short story idea that I conceived during the current hiatus, but that I'm not super excited about.

tbh, just in the last week or so I've started entertaining returning to the one-shot follow up idea. None of the reasons I set it aside were that bad, and working on something might be better than nothing at this point, even if the something is just so-so... maybe it'll be better than I think

[vothnthorvaldson]

Very similar issue!
I'm on a scheduled hiatus that went much longer that the intended period (in my case overworking in my day job and anxiety then loss of interest due to Tapas new vision (if there is one ).
Like you, I mostly ignored the whole site, including comics and novels by creators I like and support, and who support me too.
I'm slowly coming back and it is uncomfortable.
I have no advice to give you, just saying there's someone else on that boat and as we are reading each other's comic, this is a good case to show there is no reason to be either pissed, or on the other side, guilty to stop reading at times. It happens

[davidbeta20]

Yes completely! I know your pain. I started a comic called Spectrym here on tapas years ago. And it did gain a decent following first but then hit a plateau. It was my first work so I had a bunch of ideas that I just threw at the wall due to my email inexperience. So I stepped away feeling as if I just wasn’t motivated enough to keep going. But I’ve come back over a year later a better story teller with a new title iIm currently working on called “A Land Where Knights Dwell.” please check it out if your interested.

https://m.tapas.io/series/A-Land-Where-Knights-Dwell/info

[neichasart]

Hey !

I've been coming back from a hiatus for a little while now.
I didn't stop making art, but I kind of wrote myself into a corner / was stuck on an arc I didn't like anymore, and it made it hard to feel motivated to pick it up again.

I feel like I squandered my efforts. My series has over 1000 subs, but I feel like most of those are dead subs, since I was gone and said nothing.
It's under here if you wanna check it out.

Nitro's world | Tapas

Anyway, shameless self promo aside, I think you shouldn't feel so guilty over it.
I get it though, I lost my job, got spicy depression and it took a long time to crawl out.

I guess, maybe you could try working on it for yourself, as in make content but withold from posting for a little while. Just until you feel passionate about the story again and it overrides the anxiety.

I also find rereading my own stuff helps me remember WHY I wanted to make this in the first place.

Personally I'm more angry at myself than anything, but I'm hoping that staying in the forums will help me hold myself accountable.

Wishing you luck !

[Kittyfox]

Oh hey, me too! Over the summer, I took a break from drawing, but once September rolled around and I was supposed to get going again, I just couldn't. And the crappy thing is, I really wanted to, because I'm currently reworking the beginning to get rid of the cringe and really bad art, and reading it just makes me feel horrible. I've started to be more active on the forums again, and make a habit of doing an inked sketch a day (thanks LegendofGenii and Inktober!) in hopes of being able to draw digitally again.
Thank you so much for this thread

Oh also here's my series if you wanna check it out ^^"

Dreamcatcher | Tapas

[ble]

I stopped doing art for several months, i think the last time was around march or april, and ....gonna be honest, now that i returned to make art around september, i remember why i quit xD

Is f*****g depresing. Like what i do, barely got any notice or views, like my shit is invisible. Meanwhile, i see the blessed artists, having so many likes and success, actually making a living from art. So idk i guess for the second or third time i will have to quit art, because there's no bright light in the horizon that tells me there's a future for me in this field.