Comic creators with disabilities: What do you go through, and how do you cope?

[revisionstudios]

Was writing about my disability on another thread and thought this might be a good idea.

Do you have any disabilities (physical or mental) or chronic illness that interfere with your comic making? If so, how do you cope with it? (Or do you need help coping?)

Compared to some, mine is pretty minor. I have a speech impediment. Mentally I know exactly what I want to say, but my voice locks up from 10-30 seconds at a time. Sometimes I can't even start sentences. There are certain sounds that are harder, especially if they start a word (vowels and hard consonants like k, g, b). It's a genetic thing that affected my mom and my grandma, but they largely "grew" out of it in their twenties. My mom still stutters when she's stressed, but overall she's fluent.

I'm 25 right now and crossing my fingers that I'm the same. My speech is way better now than it was when I was a teenager, and I'm a hell of a lot more confident, but it still gets in the way often (I just care less and expect patience from people).

It affects my comic the most on the marketing and business end. I'm basically the face of the comic/company and the team leader, so most PR goes through me both online and off. Not only do I have to deal with being shy, I have to risk looking incompetent to a business partner. I can't be as articulate with my words, especially on a bad day, and often have to switch out words on the fly with the closest synonym--which sometimes results in awkward sentence structure or not conveying exactly what I want to. And forget about introducing myself: my name starts with one of those "hard to say" consonants. People really do perceive you as dumber when you can't talk fast enough, and it sucks.

I vend at conventions a lot, even do panels occasionally. I'm usually fine if I have a partner to lean on verbally. I kinda just had to get over it, because the only other team member near me has heavy social anxiety, and the rest are out of state or in another country... so no one else could really fill the role.

I'm pretty used to stepping up, though. I was a general manager at a restaurant for awhile, which meant I had to get real comfortable answering phones and handling customer complaints. Not that I enjoyed it, people are rude (Especially in the beginning, I'd get hung up on a ton, people would ask to talk to someone else, or they would make my impediment the butt of a joke).

I'm still here doing it though, and it's all worth it to me despite how stressful it can be. What are your experiences?

[punkarsenic]

im autistic, and mentally ill. both affect my process of making comics, but not like... awfully? i guess?

the biggest problem being autistic causes is that my theory of mind is shit (ie i know what i know, but i dont know what you know, and if you know what i know.) so i think sometimes my comics are confusing, and i struggle to tell when looking at a page if it makes sense to someone else. this is especially a bitch when it comes to exposition. i work through it by knowing the rules, when it comes to lettering and pages themselves being legible, and... i havent quite figured out how to make sure my stories make sense. i try to get people to proofread it, but either they dont know comics so that might be why theyre confused, or they read it far more closely than most people will and thats why theyre not confused. its a work in progress.

being mentally ill effects my work in many more ways. sometimes depression will keep me from drawing for weeks or months, or ill try and itll spiral into self hatred and violence. i take a lot of criticism to heart and get emotional about it, which i shouldnt. i know most of the time when im being mental, but cant help it, so its like working with a sullen toddler. horrible.

that said, both can be great for my comics as well. aside from giving me more to write about, more to channel into my stories and characters, mania + autistic hyperfixation can lead to super productive spurts. also, anxiety and emotionality always being off the rails means ive developed a high tolerance for stress, and i can handle failure and be kind to myself because i have to practice it all the time. i wouldnt say 'ooh ya being disabled makes me great at comics. would never change it' but i dont think id want to be different than how i am, really. my disabilities, my experience of life with them, are fundamental to who i am and the stories i tell. so there.

[Mari]

Mine isn't really a disability, since it's technically an illness, but I was born with it & it affects me in everyday life. I have rheumatism of the joints & back combined with loose joints(inherited from my grandmother&mother), so I have massive pains in my arms & back. The loose joints also caused the bridge of my feet to collapse a few years back (meaning, my feet are extremely flat), so now I can't walk or stand without special shoe fittings that are super expensive. There is one rheuma medication that helps, but you can only take it for two weeks every month, so the rest two weeks everything is pain. My hands sometimes lock in a fist and I have to force the fingers open. It scares me since my grandmothers fingers have been completely unusable for the past thirty years, so that's probably going to happen to me in the future as well.

[Knight_Wolf]

I have a hearth severe hearth conditon just so that guys get the idea most doctors that see me for the first time and read my chart go how did he pass 6 years whit the surgery that i needed and the lock on there face his realy funny!
so there are days that i just dont feel strong enough to work on any thing how i cope i rest listen to music pet my cats and live to fight anither day!

cocas

[revisionstudios]

Chronic illnesses count too! Those can be so debilitating, and I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. I genuinely hope that you get as much use out of your hands as possible, and that you won't be stuck in the same situation as your grandmother for a long, long time.

[yondoloki]

Hey autist here!

The theory of mind is definitely a bitch. My dad gave me some advice on that though when I was young and started to write. He said: "Imagine you are writing to dumb people". Yea okay, maybe not the best way to formulate it, but it works for me in a weird way. maybe it can help you? I also have some links about how to enhance readability etc. if you want some.

To me I don't think autism debilitates me when it comes to comic making, quite the opposite. I've always drawn, and drawing have been a way of communication and coping throughout my life, so it is very natural to me. I have always made up stories to figure out my own feelings and things happening around me, so story making is very therapeutic for me. It is also one of my special interests, go figure If I don't draw for about two weeks I can physically feel it.

What can be debilitating is my very low stress threshhold. I was late diagnosed and have had several mental breakdowns because of stress and depressions, and every time I have become more and more vulnerable to it, to the point where I cannot work full time anymore. I can barely work two days. And when I get stressed I cannot draw, and if I can't draw I get stressed. See where I'm going? I need to find room for comic making, or at least drawing, or I can't work.

But when it comes to everything around the drawing part, that is very difficult to me. Like marketing. Getting myself out there without being obnoxtious, or seem desperate. When should you answer comments, when shouldn't you? WHAT should I answer? How do I advertice my comic? How do I theoretically structure a competition, or engage my readers? What should I write in the description under the comic page, etc, etc, etc. I need to plan everything, but when you don't know what to plan for, that complicates things a lot, and I haven't found any coping mechanisms for it yet >.<

[punkarsenic]

oh my DAYS marketing. anything w social interaction. its terrible, i need like, a twitter promotion handbook.

that advice makes sense, i think, although idk how you slot it in with 'show dont tell'? those links sound good too!

[revisionstudios]

But when it comes to everything around the drawing part, that is very difficult to me. Like marketing. Getting myself out there without being obnoxtious, or seem desperate. When should you answer comments, when shouldn't you? WHAT should I answer? How do I advertice my comic? How do I theoretically structure a competition, or engage my readers? What should I write in the description under the comic page, etc, etc, etc. I need to plan everything, but when you don't know what to plan for, that complicates things a lot, and I haven't found any coping mechanisms for it yet >.<

I understand this completely! I think every artist goes through this, but I'm sure it's even more difficult since managing stress is such a big factor in your life.

It's really easy for me to get overwhelmed, and when I do, I get into a similar self-destructive loop. What consistently helps me is writing lists.

Like, just writing out everything that's swirling in my mind and trying to make sense of it. Then I organize everything into similar batches, then break it down into small tasks--as small as I need them to be. Granted it works a little better with concrete things rather than the anxiety-inducing questions, but it makes everything much more manageable suddenly. Maybe write down all your questions and pick ONE to focus on for a day. Do research, talk to other people about it, and write down a few things that you want to try. Being proactive about solving it should help you feel more in control of the situation. And though you may still stumble through it, it'll be a lot less painful than going in blind.

And it's not like you gotta do that every day if you don't want to--choose to have a focus day like that whenever you feel like it's necessary.

[yondoloki]

Like, just writing out everything that's swirling in my mind and trying to make sense of it. Then I organize everything into similar batches, then break it down into small tasks--as small as I need them to be. Granted it works a little better with concrete things rather than the anxiety-inducing questions, but it makes everything much more manageable suddenly. Maybe write down all your questions and pick ONE to focus on for a day. Do research, talk to other people about it, and write down a few things that you want to try. Being proactive about solving it should help you feel more in control of the situation. And though you may still stumble through it, it'll be a lot less painful than going in blind.

Hmm, I actually do make lists like that when I'm stressed with daily chores and such... I really didn't consider doing that with marketing my comic too... Thanks for that! I'll give that a try! I have been doing a lot of research lately, but it has been very unorganized because I think I've tried to research everything at once. No wonder I get confused since I suck at multitasking xD

[Mocha]

I'm severely depressed, have been for 5 years... And uh, I guess counselling helps me cope a bit? Other than that I'm absolute shit at coping with it, keeping up with classes and making comics at the same time so I sort of struggle through each day, but I never stop trying even when some days I want to crawl up in a hole and die.

I guess being persistent and stubborn is a good thing in this case.

[juyunseen]

I suffer from depression quite often, but what's really amazing to me is the thing that always pulls me out of it is working on my projects. Writing and drawing is the thing that I kinda hold on for. I haven't been depressed in months now, and I pulled myself out of the last wave by starting my current comic.

[Michelle]

That's great that you've managed to work through the difficulties of your speech impediment, even if it can be really difficult. I can't imagine the challenges of doing a pitch with an impediment, it's hard enough for me to do one at all! @@ but that's interesting to hear how you're able to swap words around to make it work, even if it's not perfect. And screw those people who think less of you for having a slower speech.

I struggle with depression and anxiety, which has been both awful and sort of helpful? I wouldn't recommend it to anyone, but I've tried to make the most of the situation.
There are times where my brain just falls into a downward spiral and it's tough to do anything. At the same time, I feel extremely guilty if I don't make good on a promise, so I always push through to meet my update schedule. But if I'm having a bad health week, it's an absolute slog. If I have a bad panic attack, it can put me behind schedule for a day or two. It's frustrating because oftentimes there's no direct cause for a depression spell or panic attack. Sometimes I can be fine for weeks, even a couple months, and then one day my brain just kinda craps itself.

As for making use of it, I think the problems I face help make me a more empathetic and introspective person. I also explore a lot of feelings of anxiety and loneliness in my work, and my hope is that people with similar conditions might find resonance there. I've lent an ear to others on many occasions when they've felt similar feelings, and I'm always open to my readers if they feel like they need someone to talk to. I know how miserable it can be to feel so crappy and have no one to talk to, so I do what I can using my experiences to help others.

[revisionstudios]

That's great that you've managed to work through the difficulties of your speech impediment, even if it can be really difficult. I can't imagine the challenges of doing a pitch with an impediment, it's hard enough for me to do one at all! @@ but that's interesting to hear how you're able to swap words around to make it work, even if it's not perfect. And screw those people who think less of you for having a slower speech

Pitches are horrible!! Haha. Especially because every word counts and it needs to be as efficient as possible. USUALLY I'll have my tablemate rattle off the pitch, but I have to deal with it if they're away on a break or something. I feel like I lose sales sometimes because I'm not able to do my own story justice :'D I always make it sound lame...

I appreciate the sentiment!! It took a long time but now I don't care as much when people see me differently.

As for your own thing, it's really cool to hear that you like helping people who are in a similar boat as you. I think going through that sort of thing does shape us in a way and opens us up to be more accepting and supportive of others, especially if you didn't receive it yourself. I'm often told that despite my impediment I'm a really good communicator and teacher, so I'd like to think having that handicap growing up made me look at things in a broader sense.

Keep kicking ass though, you put out a great comic and I'm always happy to see it update!

P.S. if you ever need someone to talk to about comic woes yourself, hit me up!! Sometimes the people who listen the most need it the most. <3

[NickRowler]

I was diagnosed with PDD-NOS as a young child, which is sort of like a very mild version of Autism. I had problems with learning how to speak, read, and write. This does effect my comic because I still struggle with grammar. I usually cope with this by spell checking and grammar checking pages multiple times.

However, my biggest major issue I struggle with is clinical depression. This can give me self doubt and on down days, make it impossible to draw. I am not the best at coping with this. I tend to take a hiatus in the winter. I also don't work on my comic every day, which helps give me a day to relax. But I feel I need to tackle some person life problems before I can say I am perfectly coping. On the other hand, I also use my depression as a major topic in my works.

[indagold]

I have bipolar 1, mild anxiety and dyslexia. I really don't want to give sob story of my life but I get easily distracted and have piss poor memory. I made a full recovery though, meds work fine and despite tiny set backs to making art I haven't relapsed in 8 years. I can function like a normal sane, rational human being and not pissing on the floor in the fetal position and crying so clearly I accomplished something in coping with it.

[Michelle]

As for your own thing, it's really cool to hear that you like helping people who are in a similar boat as you. I think going through that sort of thing does shape us in a way and opens us up to be more accepting and supportive of others, especially if you didn't receive it yourself. I'm often told that despite my impediment I'm a really good communicator and teacher, so I'd like to think having that handicap growing up made me look at things in a broader sense.

Keep kicking ass though, you put out a great comic and I'm always happy to see it update!

P.S. if you ever need someone to talk to about comic woes yourself, hit me up!! Sometimes the people who listen the most need it the most. <3

Thanks so much for the kind words and support! #;u;#
I agree that when you have a disadvantage you're able to see things in another light. There's no shortage of asshats and cruelty in the world, so why not help people out?

[Swamp]

Sorry to pull up an old thread. I am new and as far as I could tell in site rules, commenting on old threads is better than making a new one. Please tell me if I messed up.
I have kinda a pile of things.
I am generally mentally weird, and have a number of official diagnosis's, some unofficial, and some suspicions I don't have the money to get confirmed. I get depressive episodes, hypomanic episodes, but my biggest problem is anxiety. I used to be terrified of leaving my room and have panic attacks where I'd go into minor seizures. I'm still an anxious person, but years of counseling and medication mean I'm pretty functional!
I also have EDS/POTS (which wrecks my nervous system and is why my anxiety gets so bad), but mainly means I faint if I stand too long, am always sleepy or sleeping, and have chronic pain. I only got diagnosed in the last few years though, so I'm still constantly worried I'm making it up and everyone feels this way.
I don't do a great job of taking care of myself. I don't have the money to rest or the health to make money, but I have a great support system and am a pretty happy person. I'm learning to take the pressure off myself to be as fast or productive as other people and love myself even if I can't "make up" for my disability. Writing my comic is very cathartic, and I've spent a lot of time wrestling with theology. (Crazy me though I was disabled because G-d was punishing me for liking girls and I was going to hell, despite being agnostic. Brains are great)
The most important thing for me is gratitude. I used to think there was a life I was supposed to have that was taken from me. I can't cook, go out to clubs, write like I want, travel, ect. And pain doesn't get better when you get used to it, it just gets boring. I spent a long time bitter I didn't have the youth I was owed, but I don't think I was owed anything. I have an amazing life, and this is an amazing world. Each day in it is a gift, not a failure to reach the day I wanted. Like, dogs exist! My fiance exists! Sometimes I get to eat marzipan! I got to exist today, and if I'm lucky, I get another day tomorrow. How sweet is that?
And hey, if nothing else, being a crazy, sickly disaster is great writing reference.

[SpavVy]

I'm on the autism spectrum with anxiety and depression to top it off which can have a negative impact on my comic at times. I always struggled with grammar and I used to struggle with spelling. I have one character named Jeremy that is autistic and writing for him is super easy so that's the plus side I guess. The depression often makes me feel unmotivated and the anxiety tends to make me second geuss myself waaaay too much.