I can predict your future (CLOSED)

[abigailkbacilla]

My comic, Commander Princess Maisie

Be as harsh as you'd like! It's my first comic and I know I need to improve

[infectedbloodcomics]

Go ahead, then, thanks

The Green-Eyed Sniper

[Doubtcent]

English Project Shorts

[Redthic]

Yeah, I debated all morning if I should do this.

Comics on VHS. Hopefully it isn't too terrible.

[teoferrazzi]

ok SIGNUPS ARE CLOSED
I will review these comics in due time. stay tuned.

[Oreoma]

ah great,looks like its okay for plot driven comics

right,heres mine >>> thing from a year ago
I hope its okay for non-tapastic comic
I dont have it uploaded on tap since I know its....well,its crap,to be honest

I'd appreciate if you consider reviewing it though
go ahead and hospitalize it

(EDIT: sign ups are closed,and right after I posted,some sick timing I got...too bad :/)

[teoferrazzi]

you posted before i closed the thread, you're good to go : )

[teoferrazzi]

too niche. you're making comics for people who are interested in the ins and outs of the gaming industry.
and your satire is too heavy-handed; you're shoving your message in the reader's face, rather than being subtle about it.
you should try and make comics on broader subjects within gaming, and develop your writing towards a more subtle approach.

[teoferrazzi]

this thread wasn't meant for you; obviously you've already established yourself as an artist and you know what you're doing.
any criticism i make of your comic would be strictly a matter of taste.

[teoferrazzi]

unique style, intriguing premise, i see potential.
there's one thing you've done that always irks me in story-based comics, and i'll say it again..
don't shove every character's back-story into my face early on. have it show itself organically. i know you've given these a lot of thought and you really wanted to share them as soon as possible, but this eagerness is that of an amateur. play the long game. reveal their personalities as time goes on.

[teoferrazzi]

you're ripping off Maximumble's art style.
there is nothing in these comics that is specific to a homeschooler's life.
i've seen the jokes you've made, with minimal variations, elsewhere.
you should try a little be harder to come up with material i haven't seen before.

[teoferrazzi]

this comic is great. it's got a charmingly naif art style, the humor beats are spot on, it has a voice. i'm absolutely looking forward to more of this.
there's just one thing
the LETTERING is AWFUL.
how did that slip past you? the font choice isn't appropriate for the type of comic at all. it makes the whole thing look amateurish.
fix that immediately!

[teoferrazzi]

considering your limited art skills, you should try making the panels less busy. try to condense as much information in as little space as possible.
i don't understand some of your lettering choices either - it looks like you just decided to bolden random words.
well, not random words, but words where the stress would fall anyway. so making them bold is redundant.
it also takes too long for the story to go anywhere. you devoted like a dozen chapters to a conversation that could have been resolved in one or two.
LESS IS MORE.

[teoferrazzi]

humor is kinda hit and miss.
sometimes there isn't a real joke, sometimes there is some level of humor, but ruined by poor pacing.
other times the visuals make it really hard to understand what's happening. try focusing on material that is easy to translate into your simplistic art style.

[yartzanaserenade]

Thank you for your opinion , it was better than what I thought .
It actually surprised me cause I thought I wasn't saying enough about my characters . Maybe you refer to the last extra pages. Those are actually about their original roles i gave them when I first designed them as a child. They evolved much after that, I'm just recycling the visuals for affection.
I thought to share that to make it look a bit more ''friendly '' after a History lesson , (also cause I rarely mention their names and maybe people want to know) But maybe I should just remove them for now cause it's confusing .

Thanks again ! I'll try to improve that

[ratique]

Awww but I wanted my comics future predicted sooo badly! D:

[Doubtcent]

Thanks for the review. I'm still kinda new at the whole comic making thing. I've still got a lot to learn!
I wasn't entirely sure what my comic was missing, so I'll definitely be looking into improving on pacing and humor.

I am getting better as I go along, especially since I'm redoing a lot of my staler comics. Heck, I'm not even that great at coloring, let alone inking. I guess it would make sense if I pursued simple things instead of complex ones (that's more of my own mind wanting a challenge for humor, but doesn't doesn't always translate into laughable jokes).

Thank you for the advice.
(however, I was also wondering what my "future" could be if I somehow broke through this humor wall I've yet to climb, i.e.what sort of thing could I end up doing if I head down the path I'm on, yadda yadda yadda)

[infectedbloodcomics]

Hahaha Ok, thanks!

[abigailkbacilla]

I appreciate the critique!
Do you have any fonts or examples of comics that are similar to mine so I can try to replicate them? I'm honestly not very good at typography so I'd like an example or two if you don't mind

[teoferrazzi]

well, i think that you should go hand-written. it would suit your art better.
or else, this would be nice: it's called Smilage.

think about it.