If you draw/write horror, does your own work scare you? (+poll)

[DokiDokiTsuna]

• Yes
• No
• A little

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I remember distinctly saying once that I was not a 'horror person'...it might even have been on this forum, even.

Fast-forward however many years later, and I draw bloody death scenes on the regular, and I'm constantly writing about gore, violence, and mental torture-- within the Splatoon fandom, it's probably what I'm most famous for, if anything. ^^; Yesterday, someone IRL asked me what I was working on (I script-write a lot at work) and of the genres they suggested, I had to admit horror was the most accurate.

I...still don't feel like a 'horror person', though. ^^; When I'm drawing something NSFW in that way, my usual mental state is 'giddy hand-claps'. In fact, I often listen to super-cutesy girlypop anime music while I color that kind of art, it seems to help me get into a flow state while I'm rendering blood stains...When I write similar content, I do kinda sit around looking haunted, and feeling mildly sad while I'm thinking of the words...but that's about as intense as it gets.

The result is a feeling like imposter syndrome, like I look at all the commenters wailing and crying under my work and talking about how horrific it is, while thinking "man, this is so much fun =) "

I'd like to think this is normal. XD It seems like it's probably normal, based on what I've heard from horror fans...but I've never actually heard from horror creators on that front, so that's why I wanted to ask.

[JoshRaed]

I sort of shock myself writing horror stuff because I just casually imagine a child protagonist, then a bunch of horror scenarios, and as I develop the story before I know it i’m like watching this sequence where a child having a mental breakdown and is about to cut his arm and vomit black vile and i’m like “Is this really what i’m writing right now?” and I have to come to the conclusion that yes I am writing this. This is one of many scenes I had to find a way around in a way that wasn’t overly gratuitous, which was having the other character jump in and stop him which made it feel more intense in a sense but less graphic as the knife barely touches him now.

But even then i’m not sure if i’m ever going to be comfortable drawing this kind of thing, which will be a problem given that this is a comic concept. I’ve seen a really popular webcomic that I know would not hesitate to do this kind of thing, but given this comics excesses (one of the characters watches snuff films and this hasn’t been acknowledged in like a hundred chapters), I’d say that the should have had some hesitation.

I’ve enjoyed movies that do things I’d definitely hesitate to do. Like I can’t imagine convincing a film studio to make a scene for a theatrically released film where a little girl pees all over herself, much less the many things i’m probably not allowed to write into a forum post.

[daeygurart]

I have this horror comic I've been planning on doing and every time I write it I get nightmares LMAO

[kyupol]

I don't consider any of my comics to be "horror". But when I showed AngHell Dela Blackpill to a coworker friend of mine he told me it's "scary". When I asked why he said "the psycho school shooter, the dude who commits suicide, and the whole Blackpill worldview"

I dunno... Horror doesn't scare me at all. But the closest things in horror that scare me are anything involving aliens and demons.

[AmysGames]

Hm, I think it's pretty normal to get desensitized to your own works after a while. I'm not exactly a horror creator, but there were a few scenes I considered pretty horrific when I first came up with them, but no longer phase me now that I've written them out.

On the other hand, I don't think I would ever write something that made me truly, genuinely uncomfortable. Not to say that I've never gone out of my comfort zone, because I have, but I think if something was legitimately 3spoopy5me I would just not write it. Maybe just due to the limits of my own imagination, though.

[UrMom]

I haven't done any horror fiction but I used to draw a lot of venty gore and horror stuff, also my current comic has scenes that could border on horror for some folks. It never bothered me, if anything, drawing messed up stuff is rather relaxing. It has the same catharsis or emotional release as someone creating/listening to metal music. Plus, as I've mentioned a couple times on the forum before, I grew up on horror and spent some of my teen years rl horrors for art reference and casual psychological study. I'm way desensitized to fictional horror. Lol

With that being said I've gotten a little more apprehensive about drawing or sharing horror/gore as I've gotten older. Not sure if I've lost my edge over the years, gotten too nervous about what people may thing, maybe I'm not in as dark of a mental space anymore. Either way, I'm not as eager to horror in front of others anymore. (This is something I've recently become aware of, so I'm actually going to try to make a point in participating in Goretober this year to get this weirdness out of my system.)

Also, while I'm desensitized to horror, I am a bit unnerved (In an excited/fun way.) about the upcoming chapter due to it being an attempted "realistic" depiction of a scary domestic situation. It's not horror per se, but is loosely based off stories I've been told by survivors in my family when I was a kid, so it hits a little close even if I've thankfully never personally experienced such a thing.

[DokiDokiTsuna]

On the other hand, I don't think I would ever write something that made me truly, genuinely uncomfortable. Not to say that I've never gone out of my comfort zone, because I have, but I think if something was legitimately 3spoopy5me I would just not write it. Maybe just due to the limits of my own imagination, though.

Yeah, I think all writers have lines they don't want to cross; experiences that are just a little too real or painful for them specifically that they don't want to explore in fiction. I think that's probably the reason why I can't scare myself; the kinds of horror that would actually make me afraid (and there are a lot of kinds) would not be showing up in my work-- I would rather stay away from them entirely. ^^;

I am a bit unnerved (In an excited/fun way.) about the upcoming chapter due to it being an attempted "realistic" depiction of a scary domestic situation. It's not horror per se, but is loosely based off stories I've been told by survivors in my family when I was a kid, so it hits a little close even if I've thankfully never personally experienced such a thing.

I actually did something similar recently...by all means, the scene wasn't that scary; the main antagonist just gets frustrated with the MC and yells and shoves her around a little. But the specific things that he says and events leading up to that outburst...it just felt a little too real for me.
In a story where characters usually shoot star-lasers at each other, a simple, personal, grounded act of violence like that actually stands out and feels more severe...I had to take a break from the story for a couple weeks after writing it. ^^; I just needed a minute...

[BarBarKetrab]

As much as I'd like to be a bit frightened by my own creations, I feel that I subconsciously don't go far enough.

Like, I guess I'm somewhat afraid to actually write/draw/animate things that properly scare me. I think I focus on more, uh, kitschy(?) horror that amuses me more than anything else.

[2DLenzy]

Depends on what "scare" means. I'm not a horror creator, but honestly, I feel like I'd be one who has a lot of fun drawing/writing it. Especially those graphic shock scenes that give you nightmares.

Not doing anything horror rn, except maybe a Halloween ep for my current comic, but I'm holding myself way back cause I don't want my comic to become too graphic/horrific, just dramatic/shocking. (I want it to tho, lol. I'm in the wrong genre, I think)

On a different note, I do love tension/buildups, which fits into both the drama/horror genre, and I legit feel anxiety sometimes when I plan/draw those long tense moments and suspense. Always looking forward to those scenes, when they come around.

[BreeBaxter]

Oh, 100%. Like, I had this moment where I was running on zero sleep, just vibing with vertigo (not a cute combo, btw), while writing this super intense psychological horror. Not the fun ghost stuff I post here, but like, deep, twisted ‘am I losing my mind?’ kind of horror. Oh, and I was also juggling a medieval mystical text and a couple of philosophical rants—because, ya know, multitasking.

At one point, I was writing this scene where a criminal defendant totally deconstructs the whole field of psychology, like, breaking down therapy piece by piece, and then gets sentenced to therapy, only to slowly drive his therapist completely mad. It was dark. And the wild part? The themes from all these things I was working on started bleeding together. I legit started questioning my own reality. Like, ‘Wait, am I losing it?’ It felt like my brain was glitching. So, yeah, when I say my own work freaks me out, I mean it in the most ‘Am I about to turn into one of my own characters?’ way possible.

[GothickangelStudios]

The short stories I wrote in highschool in the 90s were pretty dark and scary. After digitalizing them, I would print them off for people I knew to read. They found them scary and some compared the style writing I use, to that of Stephen Kings. Which I was suprized because Ive never read his books.
My manga is watered down alot however, to keep it under 18+.
Back then 'Ghost Stories to tell in the Dark' even scared adults and it was a kids book.

[beebutterbee]

while thinking "man, this is so much fun =) "

I think most horror writers think that actually! I think it can be a bit like morbid fascination, it's like people who write dramas don't necessarily wan't that to happen in their lives its just what's interesting to them. When I write horror stories I think it's actually sort of funny/absurd, but it does scare me a little, but more the implications of things rather than anything written. Usually the horror elements I use are from past nightmares, which were scary at the time but writing them I just sort of get into the zone of creating stories.

One of my close friends is a specifically a horror writer, they write short stories for journals, and they told me for them its like working through traumas. But also horror is their thing, they just enjoy writing it. It's what keeps them writing.

[Rowan_Lane]

Definitely, especially when I come up with a particularly gross design and wonder where I drew that spooky inspo from.

This monster is a "Fleshgait," from my book, and I was thinking of how to portray a human forcefully taking control of an animal soul and body. This was the result. Please tell me my mind is not disturbed ahhhhh.