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Apr 2021

Hi all, I'm writing (or, trying to. That's kind of the point of the topic.) a dystopia similar to the giver, with a ton more Science Fiction.
Every resident in Industria, the massive city they live in, is born with a thing called a Core, which is the technological, genetic engineering masterpiece that has been worked on for decades. Cores take the place of both the heart and the brain, executing the user's instructions perfectly. Some residents are born with genetic mutations, which lead to them growing Hypercores, instead of normal ones. Instead of writing everything out here, I'll just put the google doc link: Here you go3.
Now that we're all on the same page, here's the issue I'm facing: I'm not sure exactly how to tell my story. I want it to be about a child named Daniel, who's born with a Hypercore, and his escape from the dystopian world everyone's trapped in, but I don't know how to get to each of the story beats that are needed.
The incredibly oversimplified timeline I'm thinking should be:
Daniel discovers a post about Overdrive on a Hypercore forum, leading to him using it in class. This alerts the government to his existence, and they naturally want to capture him before he does anything too drastic, such as destroying the dome that the city is kept in, as Hypercore users are the only ones without restrictions on what they can use energy for.This leads to him going into hiding, understanding the usages of his Hypercore, and eventually freeing the founder from The Battery, which powers down the dome and allows for escape.
Something along those lines is the plan, but even while writing that I found myself having to think of new elements to cover gaping plot holes, while still leaving some in. For instance: Sure, the Hypercore users will be fine without The Battery, since they can just absorb life, but what about the normal people? Having the protagonist kill the entire population of a massive city akin to Pangea in town form wouldn't exactly be the happiest ending.
Sorry for the long post, but I'm really stuck here. I'm really passionate about this story and would rather it not go to waste just because I couldn't figure out how to write it. All feedback appreciated, thank you in advance.
That being said, if anyone is also interested in helping me write the story, I could use however much help I can get lol.

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    Apr '21
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    Apr '21
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I would start writing out possible ways for the plot to get to the point you want it to in a nature way.

Give reasons for how and why it happens too.

Hello!

If you’re going off of The Giver as your main inspiration try looking at the themes of it. It’s about more than just a dystopian society. Its themes give the book really solid groundwork to build off of plot-wise.

Since it’s a dystopian novel, try and figure out what you want to say/comment on about society and use that as your guide for the plot.

Also, maybe give the name of your city a second thought. “Industria” is… not great. It's too on the nose and doesn't give the reader any insight into what the civilization is about or why it was formed (other than the fact that it's industrial in nature).

Got it! My influence from The Giver also included their social hierarchy, and routines and such, but I figured it could just be roped into the category of "Dystopia," considering the unique way that Lois Lowry wrote it. And about the name... yeah. On second reading, it's probably a little too on the nose. I was using latin as an inspiration for a lot of the phrases in the book, since they usually sound profound before you even understand what they say in english, so I was thinking industria (lowercase i) as in energy, and didn't even consider the other way is could be construed. Thanks a bunch1

Harking back to the old Viking stories with Yggdrasil, the Tree of Life, perhaps there is some infinite source of life that can be expanded or spread that would allow The Battery to be powered down and allow the normal people to still power up from this alternative source. This might create a task that must be achieved before The Batter is powered down, AND might allow the Hypercores to not drain life from all around. (I've tackled a similar issue in my book series).