In a action adventure story is it a smart thing for the hero to trust a girl he goes on a adventure with?

[Silver7]

Like even in mythology Samson lost his life because he trusted Delilah and Even Hercules lost his life because of a girl, in the myth Hercules' girlfriend gave him a coat to wear that ended up poisoning him.

Like imagine if the story was real, Is it better for the hero to not trust a girl too much even when he is on an adventure with her?

(Like think about an adventure taking place in real life, do you think a girl would stay loyal to you even if she is put in a difficult situation?)

[LunarScyphozoa]

I think your gender is completely irrelevant to if you’re going to betray someone or not, and the phrasing of this is weird and sexist. For every Delilah there’s a Samwise, adventure with whoever you find willing to hang out with you and just accept you might end up in an epic or a tragedy. Or, if you’re Medea, both of those in that order.

[Silver7]

and the phrasing of this is weird and sexist.

I didn't mean for it to sound sexist, I was just wondering what course of action would keep the hero from losing his life. I was imagining if being less trusting would be smarter. Remember that the hero might let his guard down if he falls in love with the girl and that can be used against him in all sorts of ways.

[KevinReijnders]

I mean, you could write it so that trusting the girl is actually what saves their life.

[DiegoPalacios]

Dudes can betray too.....just saying

[DiegoPalacios]

"or maybe the real betrayal was the friends we made along the way"

[kyupol]

The hero shouldn't trust anyone. Limited trust at most. Not enough to put him in a vulnerable position where the big bad can finally defeat him.

Unless it's an illusion of trust. Make readers believe he trusts the girl but he really sees 20 steps ahead and it's all part of his mastaplan.

[Silver7]

I mean, you could write it so that trusting the girl is actually what saves their life.

Yes but in a real life situation, would a woman really come through for the hero right when he needs her?

Because I believe the story of Samson was a real historical event and Delilah could have come through for Samson when he needed her by warning him about what the Philistine soldiers were planning, However she set him up and you know the rest

[moontokkym]

"Imagine if the story was real, is it better for the hero to not trust the girl too much?"

Not to inadvertently call myself a hero, but in my real life trusting my friends, female and otherwise, has been what's saved me many times. I used to be a very jaded and mistrustful person, and that made me very lonely because I was paranoid and convinced people were going to backstab me (due to previous incidents of bullying). My first friend after being alone and rejected by my peers for months was a girl who actually taught me how to be trusting and open to others, and looking back on the decade (soon to be decades) of friendship we share, i can without a doubt say that I owe her my life, i would have been so miserable and lonely without her influence and that of the friends I learnt to make through her.

The myths you talk about are simplified and dramaticised folk tales and they were written long ago at a time when women weren't considered human to the same degree as men. They were often used as scapegoats, plot devices to serve as obstacles to the hero because that was how a woman having her own thoughts and feelings was perceived by the powerful men around: her wants and needs were only obstacles when they didn't align with those of the men, and the men would eventually impose their will upon them or otherwise be diminished if they were to cede to the lesser woman. It was easy for people to believe they were vicious because people already believed they were inferior. If you base your view of how the world works only on those stories, you will end up saying sexist dated things through ignorance. I've given you a snippet of something that was real in my life, and I'm sure most people on the forum can remember a time when they were right to trust someone, and a time when they were wrong to as well. Gender has nothing to do with it, it's only if you put your trust in people who value you as much as you value them.

[kyupol]

In real life, I've built my life in such a way that I'm very rarely in the position of inferiority. Without going into detail, if I leave the company, they'd be crippled. So the supervisor and manager who really hates my guts have to play nice with me.

I can lose my job tomorrow and I'm very confident I'd be able to get another one that pays equal or greater.

Learn as many skills as possible, be willing to do jobs most people don't wanna do, live below your means, invest your savings. Watch it compound with interest and pay you for simply owning them.

I also exercise to maintain good health and eat predominantly vegetarian.

Because I know damn well being in a position of weakness sucks. I don't expect anyone to come through for me.

[LunarScyphozoa]

The hero shouldn't trust anyone. Limited trust at most.

This is.. bad advice. In terms of storytelling and reality. It’s more interesting to have a character trust another and be betrayed in fiction, and all fiction is meant to do is give your brain something to chew on. In the real world it can be very tempting to romanticize your loneliness, insist that trusting others is stupid, but this does nothing but make you feel even worse when your isolation catches up to you. Plus it makes you sound like a prick.

[KevinReijnders]

I mean yeah, why not?

I don't really care if the story of Samson is real or not, it's just a single case of a single person. Unless you are saying it's indicative of women in general? Which would be extremely mysogynistic.

[cherrystark]

You have to look at things from multiple perspectives. For example, if you look at the issue from the manosphere POV, they'd say to never trust a girl because she'd betray you and leave you for another guy, forgetting that women aren't a singular organism and that we're all human, thus capable of independent thought.

From the storytelling perspective, what kind of story is it? What role is she meant to play in the story? A female character playing the trickster role or the shapeshifter role is going to behave differently than the queen archetype or the damsel in distress. Then the writer's skill comes into play. If the writer actually takes the time to develop the character and make her well-rounded, you'll read to the end, but if you get a movie-version Hermione who is strong because of "feminism," then people might lose interest. It all depends on the story and the writer.

[powerplantanimations]

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[Lensing]

I find it a very smart thing to do not to think about sex/gender etc when you are
making decisions who to trust

[New_To_Comics]

But why would the person being a girl matter? A guy can be just as easily betrayed by a guy, if he lowers his guard.

And there's a risk of the guy creating a self-fullfilling prophecy. I mean, if someone treats me as if I am going to stab them in the back any second, they're probably behaving like jerks. Behaving like a jerk isn't going to dissuade me from betraying you in favor of someone who doesn't act like a jerk. Or just leaving you behind, as you clearly don't want me around.

[CosmicLeon]

It may be worth reading the real versions of your myths again. Not the diet versions. Hercules was a family annihilator who saved his second (soon to be) wife from a horny centaur with ill intentions, upon which he promised to never cheat on her by telling her to poising his clothes with the centaur's blood. He forgot he promise, cheated and betrayed her. So, she followed through on their agreement. And when you read his trials he often too a shortcuts or acquired his 'success' through trickery and/or lies.
When reading the myths/stories of the bible (however you'd like to define them, since both example were religious in some aspect at the time) I don't ever remember any of them being written from the perspective of the 'woman'. sure some were about them, by not from their perspective. So this view has bias. Not to mention the many different versions, that are worded differently, which can/did change their meaning from one version to another.

So when writing remember there is always multiple sides of a situation, in which most people often believe that what they are doing is right or moral. And wither that action is, is a matter of perspective. Study the villans from Avatar Korra: What they did they, and terrible as it was, still thought they were in the right. When you look at spy family, both the parents are doing what they can to make a better tomorrow. even though some of the things are straight up murder. The villains of My Hero are people who were abandoned because no one knew how to help them.
If you are looking to avoid sexism, which I think it the point of your post, you need a solid rational as to why she did it. And why she did it to him. If it is simply because 'she woman' then you have issues....There are so many factors: Social expectations/status, brain washing/thought programing (Look at the reboot of Sherah for a great example), trauma based reactions, image control, scaping goating, and more.... All of these things are very interesting to write about, and this is the space where you can avoid your concern of sexism (If you do it right). Which ever direction you pick, you are making commentary on the situation so its good to be mindful of that and research deeply.