Incredible insults for whatever use

[bronte448]

Here are two good ones I found around the internet that live in my brain rent-free.
"Your brain runs on sugar and pixie dust, you naive Scooby Snack!"
"YOU MAYONAISE SANDWICH!"
Gonna be using these in various stories as the situation comes up.
What are some other funny insults you've heard?

[Stargazer31]

My favourite insult I've ever heard is "you tin can of a man"

[Animefanka]

so there are two football clubs in the city I went to uni in and their fans have... interesting ways of insulting each other which have kinda gone viral (to the point of there being merch with them being sold 'xD)

translation: ŁKS (one of the clubs) jokes about serious topics

translation: Widzew (the other club) wears turnip shoes!!! (it sounds similair to Velcro shoes "buty na rzepy")
response: We can afford them ! -And you wear sandals and a sock!

translation: RTS (another name for Widzew, I think... 'xD) thinks that perm means dipping head in plaster

translation: ŁKS thinks that in vitro is a pizza place

translation: ŁKS mystakes Reksio (character from old Polish cartoons) for Krtek (character from old Czech cartoons) (one is a dog, another is a mole)

there are many ways to be creative with your insults... 'xD

[Kelheor]

@Animefanka
Totally sounds like

xD
Very entertaining, thank you

[Katzalcoatl]

I think cartoons make a great job at insults.

[AmeTsunami]

Definitely the tumblr post where someone used tortellini as an insult. Yes, like the pasta

[bronte448]

I'm DEAD at all these XD

[IndigoShirtProd]

I good one I've heard from a youtuber I watch was them saying that someone was "built like a limo driver." And honestly, rupaul's drag race contestants have some great reads. One queen said to another that she’s "shaped like a deep breath".

[Scarlet_Cryptid]

I like calling people "You complete and utter ____" and then filling in the blank with any random, completely innocent inanimate object. Sandwich, shoebox, Christmas ornament, tow truck, whatever. Almost any object can be made to sound like an insult when prefaced with 'you complete and utter'.

[GodbreakerComic]

"You poo cutter!"

Calling someone an asshole without vulgarity somehow makes it so much worse

[river121693]

my favorite is "you clownshoe!"

[Lazy-Gamer]

Some of my personal favourite insults are:

"Get yourself another brain cell, to keep the one you have company."

Your face looks better deformed, those bruises do everything for you."

"Does your brain run on dial up?"

"( number ) years of ( talent ) practice, huh? Looks more like you just started yesterday."

"You're not the "favourite" child in your family, are you?"

[ButterflyEmpress]

I always thought it was funny when JonTron described Wally Bear's face as "having an arrangement with the pavement" mainly due to the assonance.

And "Did you blow in from stupid town?" from Spongebob is a favorite

[Aeneas1]

There are a lot of great insults in Shakespeare, but the funniest is “Thou painted maypole!”

[TheLemmaLlama]

OHHH

Took me a while, that one XD

(Not always anatomically accurate though, depending on the consistency of the stools :P)

[bronte448]

Some eh, some jewels

[AmazementComics]

For those of us who live in North America, Joe Biden really said this once:

[ThunderChicken]

One of my favourites came from Rick and Morty:

"Your boos mean nothing to me! I've seen what makes you cheer!"

[bronte448]

I feel like this applies to Biden very well.

[bronte448]

Someone reacted to this song and said Alastor looked like his ex-wife.
He looked like he did in the thumbnail too.
BEST EX ROAST EVER.