First of all, I am very impressed this is your first comic. I see a lot of things that are done very well, like the color palettes are very nice. The coloring in the first page is especially striking and interesting. Your characters are designed well, easy to tell apart, and memorable. There are some pretty cool shots like the one that says "Bye kitt- and it's gone." I love the angle of that panel.
The paneling overall is good. It's not confusing and the tone of the dialogue matches the tone of the panels.
As for improvements, I don't think there's much I can add that hasn't already been said. Your grammar is definitely off in places, but it's actually almost spot on. There's just some minor mistakes here and there, like I noticed "is" is missing a lot. But the spelling is at least good.
I definitely agree what others said about the story. The story itself is pretty interesting and I want to know more, but the pacing is very strange. Fast pacing since it's a short story isn't necessarily bad, but it's a bit overwhelming for the reader. Like for the prologue pages, it's nice to start off with something striking, but it would also be nice to see more about the father person and who he is in this setting exactly.
I think the main things to work on are the grammar, the overall storytelling, improving the details in the backgrounds, and improving the anatomy of the characters. For example, the profile view of the red hair girl knocking on the door, her face looks very flat. Heads are a little bit too big in general.
I think this is really great and there is a lot of potential. Keep it up and keep improving!