I think you're confusing shipping and baiting there (and being quite rude). Shipping is the people interested in the characters, pandering in the creators purposefully doing it to draw in these crowds and then complaining or laughing when they get annoyed they were lied to. (Yes, there are times it's gets out of hand, no one condones things like blackmail or death threats but don't act like that's just shippers, there are sports fans and music fans and literature fans makes vague gestures at the entire point of Misery that go too far too and you don't see people saying all of them are an issue).
And shipping is a thing most people do without realising anyway. Did you want the princess and prince to get together in that Disney movie as a kid? Shipping. Did you ever watch a romcom and think "why's she going out with the jerk when her best friend loves her"? That's shipping. Anyone else think Robin deserved a happy life with Barney and not Ted? Shipping. Ever think to yourself "why are these two characters getting together when they have no chemistry"? Congratulations you've got yourself and NOTP.
It happens without people noticing, it is literally the act of being invested in a character's relationship (romantic, sexual or otherwise but as discussed the term has mostly become about romance/sex and this is way ao3 now has two seperate categories in the relationship tag) but you wouldn't tell people that were invested in the romantic leads of a romance that it was fantasy bs and worthless pandering would you? And yet, by being invested in the two romantic leads, you're shipping them.