"Infinita Tristeza" - finally gave a shape to Sadness.
The breathtaking kind, the sort that gives you drowning feeling sleep paralysis, struggling for air as if you were in Space.
The sort that has no reason, that comes after the deepest, most wholesome happiness you've experienced.
As if your body knew that you'll never ever be this happy again. As if your brain was mourning.
As if your thoughts, the happy ones too, were too much, and your heartbeats go out of control, your breathing too, yet you're unable to cry.
(I'm good and well now, so please don't worry! I've stopped taking the antidepressants I was prescribed to treat a chronic pain problem due to stress 25 days ago. They supposedly weren't addictive and I don't miss them - and the pain is not back for now! - but I imagine my brain had some adjusting to do. This weird Sadness for no reason that happened to me a few weeks ago was an interesting physical experience and it took me a while to depict it in a way that seemed right)