Goddamn @wintervigo,
So I'll preface by saying I'm not much of a horror reader, BUT I LOVED IT.
Peaks and valleys! so unpredictable! It took so many turns it left me reeling.
I'm a copyeditor in advertising, so my suggestions will mostly revolve around your wording. I'll deep dive into chapter one, and they'll be concepts you may want to apply though out.
Some places to refine: I think you could use harder-hitting verbs. You're choosing strong ones, and letting them do the action which is awesome, but I think you could intensify things and get even better.
examples:
-his heart furiously barrel-rolling against his chest ( I don't it's evocative here since what would that look like? a different metaphor or verb would be stronger and less out of place)
-when Lisa shrieks about the mahogany, something like wailed/howled/keened would be more disconcerting
just small swaps like that, you already have good choices, but could step it up more to really nail the madness of the scene, and keep readers on their toes.
Later you start leaning harder on adverbs: ravenously/furiously/sarcastically
if possible, try to choose verbs as above so you aren't softening the point with adverbs
When she's talking about calling the therapist, it would be neat if she used some classic therapy communication talk there, so rather than saying she's disgusted by his behaviour, saying like "Your behaviour is making me feel like you don't care about my interests"
Generally exclamation marks weaken the dialogue, and periods make it stronger, so if you can, try to capture tone purely with words to eliminate them where possible
lastly, the fight runs a lil long and the dialogue causes it to lose some steam. I'd cut the argument shorter and hit the fight faster to keep the tension up.
Let me know if that is helpful!
