Me never punched my kids. Me regret spanking them too much, but me still think it mostly necessary. Ideally it should never have happened, but we not experience ideal conditions. No money for child psychologist. Firstborn have too much ADHD, kept endangering self and little brother.
Me also afraid of what he might become. For sure he grow up smart and strong and charming. But there am streak of meanness in family line. Asshole tendencies that do great damage if combined with go-getter personality. Me not sure if he ever develop informed conscience. Have to build ogre in head, fast, or me might as well be like adoptive father of Caligula, who say, "I am nursing a viper for the Roman people." Mebbe firstborn not quite so bad, but still. Most people not really know right from wrong. They merely suspect it.