It's out of topic, but is similar to my experience, too. I've started to feel an interest to political and military television programmes, which my father watched, when I was in early teens. And, by the way, I've asked inconvenient questions about this topic, too.
Like, in these programmes, everything was shown only from point of view of Russia, and they showed Russia as a something good, and NATO and USA as a something bad. In the same time, father taught me that we should be patriotes, love our country and protect its interests.
So, summarising point of view, which could be extracted from these sources... patriotism - good, Russia - good, USA - bad.
And then I've thought... wait, if people living in USA, will be patriotes, this means, that they will love USA, which is the bad country? So, how patriotism can be good, when some countries are bad and hostile to Russia? But if inhabitants of other countries will state interests of Russia above interests of their own countries, will they be good (because they love Russia) or bad (because they are not patriotes)?
Hehe, I always tended to think too much, more than people around wanted.