7 / 49
Aug 2018

It was a dark and stormy night... It was the best of times, and the worst of times. These trite lines run their monologue through my brain as I wonder what I will write today. Will it be treasure, or trash. Really need to find something original. those starting lines will turn readers away rather than gather them in. Sometimes I do start a story with them, and twist them. Then when the story is charging away faster than I can write it, the subconscious figures out a more appropriate start. Rewriting, does every author wish they could write their story perfectly the first time, and never have to go back and nit pick their work? I used to, but not so much now. I have found value to the editing process. It allows me to see things I didn't when I was writing the first draft. Things to emphasis, things that point in a direction I hadn't though to go the first time. Were is this character going? First draft was torture porn, but this draft? Guess I will have to find that out.

I honestly can't think of anything to write for this thread at the moment. It's something that I can exactly succeed or fail at, yet I feel this nagging urge to write to the best of my abilities to impress strangers on the internet. That shouldn't be my intent, but no one other than myself is evaluating me in this way, right? Like, why should I care?

Besides, I'm not really feeling up to it. I mean, okay, yes, I'm choosing to participate by typing out my thoughts in a comment, but like.. whatever. A little effort thrown out there won't hurt. I needed to kill some time anyways, and what better way to do that than by practicing writing?

Well, I could always just keep writing more chapters of my projects. The same ones I keep talking too much about before they're even finished, I mean. I suppose I should feel guilty or ashamed that I tend to do that, but this overly eager attitude is what drives me on to keep writing it. That's not such a bad thing, I don't think. I guess I'll just wrap things up here. I hope I wasn't rambling or bugging anyone with this.

God I want some ice cream and money.

So I've decided to post here, but I don't know what to write. I wonder if that's a problem?

Somehow, I don't care.

Is my writing good, or is it bad? Will people like it or dislike it? Is it worth it? Is it a waste of time?

Somehow, I don't care.

But should I care? Should I take this more seriously? Perhaps not caring is irresponsible.

Even so, I don't care.

Are all these line breaks necessary? Are they taking too much space?

I don't care.

The OP mentioned prose. Does what I am writing count as prose?

Hmm, good question! But - it doesn't matter. I just don't care.

"I don't care" sounds kind of harsh - too apathetic, almost abrasive. Maybe "I don't mind" is better.

But anyways, I don't mind. Yes, that sounds better.

I haven't even written anything. So many thoughts keep interrupting.

But I don't mind.

Anyway, what was the point of this? What is the point of anything? Why?

Why not? I don't mind.

Ah, I'm pretty sure this is the secret of life.

I look at the hours tick by on my days off like they're the last moments of my life. Every wasted minute.

"You could have written something in that time," I tell myself. "You have every opportunity to update something."

But I hate it. I hate all of it. Why do I do this? Is it just a reflex that I write? Do I enjoy pulling bullshit out of my brain and translating it to mindless entertainment?

That's why authors love comments. In the grim dark of writing hell we toil away wishing someone would appreciate the blood we spend. When one person, just one, says something, anything, about the book, it lets us know that our work is not ignored.

And that's what was in my head because I don't feel like writing and I ate too many Cheetos and feel sick now.

"The job offer was a hoax," said Abi, stirring the settled cream in her coffee. "Some damn China company got hold of my resume and is trying to sell it to every scammer, their moms, and their dogs." The New England diner wasn't too busy that day. The late-summer rain made sure of that.

Sammy munched her sandwich with scholarly meditation. She spoke with full cheeks, "I wonder if it's true that the Chinese eat dogs."

"It's not true, Sammy," Abi said before taking a gloomy sip of sugared burnt beans. "I'm at wit's end, Sammy. I feel like I'm the only college grad of our class that hasn't gotten an actual job yet. Look how happy they all look on Facebook. I mean, have you seen Kasey's post?" Abi plugged her nose and added a New Jersey touch, "Oh I gawt this wonderf'ol new jawb in Manhattan." Abi huffed and brooded over her mug. "Kasey of all people. The whole sorority believed she was the most likely to work at Starbucks or somethin'."

"Nah, you're thinking of Tracy," Sammy said before taking another bite.

"And what's she doin'?"

"She got a government job at the Pentagon."

"With a math degree?"

"You'd be surprised what D. C. could have people do."

Abi moaned like the wandering ghost of the career world. Hell, that was her job. A job wanderer. Who haunts recruiters and interviewers with resumes that may or may not have been printed on high-quality resume paper.

"I never should've gotten an English degree," said Abi.

"Nonsense, that degree is your ticket to your dream job," said Sammy. She finished up her plate and wiped her face. "Something will come up. It just takes some time." She motioned for the waitress. "I'm paying for your joe."

"Sammy!" said Abi, her eyes wide. "You don't have to do that! I can pay for myself."

"Remember all those times in college you paid for my broke ass?" said Sammy with a chuckle, receiving the check. "I'm buying your coffee." Abi smiled. A melancholic one, but at least she knows she got a good friend behind her back.

"I tell yah," said Abi as they got up from the table. "No matter what job I might get overseas, even if it's somewhere in the Asian Pacific, their coffee is damn well gonna beat the sorry watered down beans they sell here."

"That's the spirit," laughed Sammy. And out they went into the deluge.

Maybe I should be serious and actually write something meaningful here? Wait no I'm too silly to do that. And full. I ate too much and havent received any ice cream....still...I should watch more Ghost Stories Dub! Wait no I've seen all the episodes D:

O crepes, o pasta
O delicious chicken
I would sing you an opera
If only I wasn't eating

Also help, need coffee
Sweet sugar too
Else I'll be full of melancholy
And I'll be feeling blue

Guess I'll give it a go before I start binge writing my novel for the night... Probably get me deep in the mood.

EDIT: So this wound up being, like, three pages long and sparked a whole new idea for me... I'll just hide it so it doesn't take up hella room on the post... Sorry. :l

They told me I wasn't born. I was found. That my eye wasn't missing. It just didn't exist.
I was created to hold the second eye of the Nonexistent King. And as a child I struggled with the knowledge that my entire existence was going to be lived as the host of an eye that didn't belong to me.

I pulled my palm away from the eye and stared at the cracked ceiling. Water trickled down to the slow-moving pool beside Nekra's corpse. The regret that brought me to sleep within an abandon building settled again in my gut. I should've left him with his owner back in the upper reaches of Kinlek. But they'd insisted that I take him. Said his nose would track Veira with ease.
And now he was dead beside me. The creature Veira and I had known since childhood. Drowned from a single night in the Callim Wastes. And here I was, finding myself in a dilapidated building, hoping to every King and god in existence that Vei wasn't in danger.

I pet Nekra's fur and yawned. "Goodbye," I said. My voice was coated with the wisp of loss, and my breath tasted like the tinge of morning. I shut my eyes and exhaled. My face held the stick of the tears I'd cried before sleep had stolen my mind and anguish. I knew leaving would be dangerous. But Nekra reminded me how harsh the world was without sentience playing against me.
I pulled my shirt from my empty socket and I sighed. I stood and wrapped the Lordstrip over my head to hide away the gaping hollow within my left socket.
The glow of the strip crossed my vision as I put it on. And the glow pulled at sweet memories. I shared my first kiss with Veira when she gave me the Lordstrip, and every time I wrapped my socket from view, I remembered the taste of her lips and the sound of her voice when she promised the Lordstrip held an innate power of the Lords. Or at least the one that owned it.
With a final prayer for Nekra I wandered from the ruins, exiting through the cave entrance we'd stumbled through the night before.

Even the light trickle of rain that the clouds summoned accentuated the wastes with the marsh pools and Rainhills that came during with the Fall.
It wasn't the season for the Callis Wetlands to overtake the Wastes. But it wasn't unheard of. The flash floods of En'tide hadn't given us a loop of four springs without wetlands for a century. And he definitely wouldn't let up with the current monarch of Kinlek in charge.
I trudged against the mud and muck, my boots sinking with every step. I made for the shallows beyond a growing pond, where the mud wasn't deep. I'd dressed in a halved shirt and shorts, expecting the dry to keep the lands, but now I regretted packing light without the spare clothing suited for the tides. The wastes were hostile with the sun. But when they flooded, new dangers emerged from the sands and stalked the waters, and the magic in the air took to forming life within the rain that pushed away wanderers. Everyone told stories to their children that En'tide's castle was buried beneath the sands. Castle Callim'kalis. That's what the wetlands and wastes were named after. And the forms that emerged in the rain were said to guard his kingdom.

I plodded atop a solid hill and scoped the area. Rivers and pools were growing and the rain was picking up once more. A few cliffs and mountains jutted from the mud and water ahead, leading to the Lenlak Cliffs in the distance, and I knew I was heading in the right direction.
The rains poured around me, and creatures formed at the base of my perch. The castle was the legend of the Wastes. But the ghost that haunted it had always been real to us in the stories. I gripped the sword at my hip and planted myself, ready to hold my ground, but a loud crack descended as the sky collapsed beside me.
I shook my head. The blast of lightning had thrown me away from the hill. And my wraps were missing.
I made to cover my eye, but the black cloud that erupted from it stung my hand. I yelped and pulled away. A dark spot evaporated from my palm like a wisp of smoke, eroding into the sky. The cloud my socket produced battled against the rain, ascending like a beacon against the blotted atmosphere above.

I had to find the Lordstrip. I sifted through the sand and stomped across a few hills until a gleam sparked within my view. I ran t the Lordstrip and cuffed it within my hands. But it was too late.
The cloud that rose from my socket stole light and color from the world and singed my face. I grasped at my head, the depths of my mind escaping through the void in my skull.

They came, predators finally able to feast upon their pray. Those who hailed from the nonexistent plain. Abhorrent monsters that were never meant to exist.
They stood at different heights, numerous amounts of limbs extending from each creature. Their patchwork jaws gaped and moaned for release from life. Damned to eternity without truly existing, they couldn't die. The sword Veira's father had given me could banish them. But they would always come back for me. And running gave me no grounds for escape.
The circle closed in. Talons tore at my exposed skin. Moans and distant screams whispered against my ears. Teeth nipped at my shoulders, and tongues slid against my forearm. Pitch black eyes rent through my gaze, and in the darkness I could see a wide array of teeth grinning at me.
He wanted his eye.
The 11th Lord wanted my eye. The one he was born without.

The creatures disappeared, erupting into a purple splash. The feeling of mud and water on my exposed back brought me to the wetlands once more. A man walked toward me, his hand falling to his side with a cloak following to cover it. His curly locks descended around his face and he stepped beside me, a shoe stamping against the ground. He was wearing shoes instead of boots in the wastes?
The Lordstrip ripped from my grasp and floated away, wrapping around the man's arm. He looked down to me and patted my head. "You found an old tattered piece of Lord's clothing?" He chuckled and rubbed my hair. "A girl your age wandering the wastes alone makes a poor end for a potential story. I'll accompany you. In exchange for some conversation, I'll return this shred of King's garb. Who knows, maybe it holds some magic in it yet."
"Who are you?" I asked. The man wore tattered garb in many layers that still managed to leave skin exposed to a breeze that whipped his clothing about him violently. He almost looked homeless, but the hulking sword on his back that stood taller than him told me he was fine on his own.
"The First King," he replied. He walked over a hill as I gawked at his answer. I stood my ground. I couldn't decide if I was confused by the man or worried for him. But, despite his ragged appearance, he didn't seem to be lying. He floated into the air, laying above the hills. "I'm not gonna carry your ass the whole way through. You looked ready to take the journey on your own. So step up and get going." He yawned. "What's your name?"
"The city calls me Null," I replied. "But Veira gave me the name Mirri'ei."
"Then Mirri'ei it is. Let's go. You look like you've lost something. I'll help you find it." He cracked his neck and stretched as he landed. "Hellvyre's off and busy and Tobu and Split are working on a new project. I need a way to pass some time."
I smiled and stepped forward. A King was willing to help me find Vei. And not just any King, but the very Lord that she believed once owned the Lordstrip.
Vei and I would make it to another kiss. And this time, I'd steal it from her lips.

Sorry this was so long. It's a bit different than the style of my current work, so I went off on it. xD But I've been working on my novel so much, this was a great break! Now I'm actually in the mood to get back to writing my novel again! I think I just needed a break for writing something else. xD This post works as a warm-up exercise!

You guys ever had that dream where a monsters attacking you but your punches are slow and weak as fk?? Shit is annoying as fuck!

Yes. I usually end up tickling them to death or make friends with them by cooking. Try it next time :wink:

I haven't for years, but I have before. I also woke from nightmare as a kid and punched my ceiling while cursing, then got scared that my parents would yell at me for it. xD (I had a loft bed, so the ceiling was right above me. I want it back, so I can drape blankets from it and sleep on the floor again! In the dark... I miss my carpet!)

Somewhere between falling madly in love with Karen and crushing her pretty little windpipe, Alta found a middle ground on which to stand and pretend to be as normal as she could possibly be. There was no distinct way in which Karen walked; no particular feature that stood out from the rest of her body; no distinguishable flair in her voice that seemed to make any Adonis swoon and Venusian beauties fall at her feet. Karen was so painfully ordinary that it irked Alta- from the tip of her toes to her stiffening shoulders, to the trembling breaths she emitted whenever the other girl so much as smiled that crooked, nauseating, beautiful smile.

Maybe that was it: she was normal. She was normal and Alta was not, not in any way or form (every once in a while she thought she spied the telling toothmarks of growing vampire fangs, but never spoke a word to her uncle). Karen had a father, a mother, two younger siblings and a cat. She played tennis in the evenings and was relatively studious, though occasionally she would - like every other student - delve into the terrors of mindless procrastination and complain about it on disgruntling Monday mornings.

Alta had a workaholic mother, a dead father whom she had never known, and an uncle who was currently busy killing someone she couldn't bring herself to know in order to pay for next month's rent. Funny how life was awfully unbalanced. So terribly imperfect. So horrendously infuriating.

"Alta, we have English next." Karen piped up beside her. "You ready to go?"
"Oh," and Alta exhaled a trembling sigh, "I'm am never."

I'll continue

"I wish there was a way to bridge the gap between my two competing passions. I really hate that my family doesn't like that I'm artistic and I like to write. Sometimes I feel ostracized by the writing community because I don't procrastinate and that I've hit a lot of milestones. I'm not in the process of writing my masterpiece anymore, I already finished it. I feel like there's a well of misery that I don't understand anymore. I'm not a depressed artist or writer. I take care of myself and I can complete things that are creative and successful. Sometimes I feel like I'm on this mountain by myself that everyone thinks I'm looking down on them. Just because I have more doesn't mean I'm happy about it. I wish I could meet more people who are as accomplished as I am instead of trying to accomplish what I already have. Sometimes I wonder why I have this personality type that I'm not allowed to feel accomplished and I always want to do more. It's like this race to climb higher and higher mountains where if you get to the top of one, you're in the shadow of the next bigger one that someone else is on the top of. I feel so little with what I've accomplished. It's more than a lot of people, but it's a lot less than where I'd thought I'd be by now."

I really wanna release this one story early but I dont have a buffer but I still wanna have it out there >.> fffffffffffffff RIP

Moving. I hate moving. Looks like I am moving to another state. Where I know absolutely no one. I hate moving. Boxes here boxes there, boxes everywhere. Boxes in the nooks and cranny's, boxes that have my jammies, wait, I don't own jammies. I hate moving.

I’m need to get off the forums and start copying some bridgeman and stuff:/

This same song:
It shouldn't be this long,
But because I listen to it on and on,
Perhaps there's something wrong.