I think you could shorten it to
"Two young fantasy world adventurers, Amelia and Hegel, hunt down dark artifacts for the academy they attend"
My synopsis is already pretty short. When people ask I say
"Love Me, Deity is about a group of college students who realize they are reincarnated gods and start learn about their past."
"Three bois working out their emotional baggage in Magical Asia."
Yup, I'm legit happy with that description. 
"High School student get's magical powers, and fights along side with a talking beaver with a Brooklyn accent."
People love talking animals.
I suppose I've practiced with Demon House the most: College girl rents place haunted by demons.
Heavy Horns is not as practiced since its selling points are just basically: A romance between two men, one has horns.
I have been working on blurbs for Secunda though since I plan on participating in the upcoming PitMad on twitter. Here's one of them: A young woman becomes the host to a monstrous skull and now must adapt to her strange new partner. Their new bond is challenged by the return of her old suitor and a dangerous hunter that catches her eye while in pursuit of the skull.
That's a good point about the names. I should remove them and make mine more pithy. @jensrichard77's take was actually really good.
These are the true stories of some of America's least known World War II veterans, the Women Airforce Service Pilots.
ooo - this is a fun idea.
the elevator pitch for my 'comic' (that's sort of not a comic but not not a comic either lmao) would be -
'illumiverses' is an illustrated (& now often animated!) anthology of poetry.
The elevator pitch I use for mine is:
Follow Empress Wu Zetian's treacherous journey from the hands of enemy Tufan soldiers back to the Forbidden City where she battles foes from within her own kingdom.
Four young men with similar secrets move into an apartment with each other having never met before (to their knowledge). They quickly become close and there is even romantic connections being formed. Magical forces become involved in their lives, though the main focus is still on their relationships with each other.
I'll post ite here because i really need help with that topic.
"In a world where an manipulative organization rulez everything, a runaway princess, and her half alien sister, team up with a boy who is searchimg for a mysterious object to save his brother from a curse"
I feel like there’s some confusion in this thread between elevator pitches and log lines!!!
The best example I could find for the distinction between the two is this:
Elevator pitch:
“ Granny is a horror movie. It’s about a serial killer who kills teenagers who violate the rules of etiquette.”
Logline:
“ Saddened by her mother’s death, a lonely teen must confront a woman claiming to be her grandmother, whose strict rules lead to a psychotic murder spree.”
I hope this helps
All-Star Squadron falls into an episode of The Outer Limits.
Superman, but he's like the main characters of the Outer Limits episodes Soldier and Behold, Eck!
A combination of Bizarro and Specter falls into pre-crisis Earth-2.
A confused white blood cell from a living universe causes trouble in an alternate WW2. He's opposed by a burned-out Dr. Strange who wants to destroy him and a golden-hearted man made of light that wants to understand him.
My comic's still real early in the story, so the whole plot necessarily hasn't been revealed yet. However,
a serious elevator pitch:
"Scarfs just can't seem to catch a break. As if things weren't bad enough already, now the fate of humanity rests in her hands- but here's the thing: she doesn't know if it's worth saving or not."
a non serious elevator pitch:
"A comic about good moms and bad moms, not moms and vodka aunts."
Me: Okay, here is my pitch. How about '50 Shades of Grey' but genderswapped.
Some Fictional Publisher: Ah yes people do like "50 Shades of Grey" but it already would be niche with a Female Domme...
Me: and the relationship slowly unraveled into being as toxic and unhealthy as critics of '50 Shades of Grey' think it should be.
Publisher: Wait so would this be a romance then or more of criminal tale-
Me: And the 'Grey' woman is actually the Head of a Mafia family and her paramour is a sidekick of the vigilante trying to take her down.
Publisher: Okay so this is sounding more like those Marvel comic things-
Me: Oh yeah and the 'grey' Character has super powers and her mafia family is based off of the seven sins-
Publisher: Okay scale it back now, I have no idea what niche you are trying to fit in here. Is it a romance? Thriller? Is it YA even though there is a '50 Shades' kink factor? What are you-
Me: And 'Grey' character is a Black Woman who was a child soldier and the 'Ana' character is basically a male Ana but with blue eyes and the 'crackhead mother' back story!
Publisher:...get out.
(That's how imagine it would go anyways...)
