Because I'm in the house bored - link your novel/comic! [CLOSED 4 NOW COME BACK LATER]

[ivanskilling]

Thank you so much for the feedback!
I'm glad to hear the prologue is engaging! I've always been concerned that it's not a good enough hook for readers. So hearing that makes me relieved!

Lol yeah the first few chapters are pretty short to introduce the setting and retain the mystery regarding the characters. It gets longer after that!

Oh thanks for pointing that out! I'll consider whether I should italicize personal thoughts in later chapters.

[anmitsuu]

It is very hard to get views as a novel writer on this site, lol. But you've just started, so there is no need to panic! I look forward to seeing you grow as a writer. Thank you for the subscribe btw, I hope you enjoy my novel.
Chapter 1: Some of the words here flow rather awkwardly. When you write "echoed in my mind for the longest time" it is not a full sentence, as you are missing the subject. This chapter is lacking in description, you threw in the adjective resplendent but never explain what these colors are. Why are they resplendent? Do they shine like the of gold? The hue of a purple amethyst? Etc Etc. If you lack in description for your first chapter, people will not want to continue with your story. There's a lot going on in this chapter that needs more description and explanation. Why does our main character feel like this is a long time coming? Why did the place feel hollow?
Chapter 2: You tend to separate each sentence through actions. I would recommend you to combine the series of actions in one paragraph (for example when she peeks outside the window, you should write in the same paragraph that she closes it) (same thing for when she talks about her family). It makes for an easier, and less awkward read. Illyana tends to voice her thoughts out loud a lot, lolol. She is cute.

[Daisy]

thank you for your criticism. i appreciate it. oh no, the popsicle! make sure you have a towel next to you or else ants will come marching for the mess.

[miss.monocle]

Thank you so much! I try to take the drawing and coloring of my panels really seriously, so I'm glad that the attention to detail on the lighting as well as character angles has paid off! I love playing with dynamic lighting too, so glowy electricity is a favorite of mine!

[anmitsuu]

I love how long your chapters are and how much thought you put into the characters. I also love that you included little descriptions about who they are towards the end of your chapter, I feel like that's a nice personal touch that makes them feel more real. Why does Gromley totally look like the heartless from Kingdom of Hearts, you feel me? I love it lolol I'm so here 4 this old man. I love you've gone and played with lighting. Especially during action scenes, everything feels really dynamic and well thought out. At times feel dark but this totally plays with the ambience, and feel for where the comic is taking place. Great job!

[anmitsuu]

Ok first off, wow you've gone and written a lot for this novel. I can already tell off the bat that there's a lot of time and effort that you put in to cultivating it, and I applaud you for that. You've done a great job so far, so here are some thoughts that I have for the first couple of chapters. And thanks for checking out my novel! I hope you like it.
Chapter 1: Eory already feels like a really interesting and well written character. The realness of his imagination alongside your talented writing is really great. Eory's internal conflict as well is something that will be great to see how he resolves/ betters himself as a whole.
Chapter 2: Wow, I can totally feel for Eory as a reader. You really feel bad for his predicament and can tell how it's effecting him as a whole. Is it fair for him to be locked up? It's hard to say as of now, but you can tell that the stories of Pollyanna has helped aid his experience in being less painful.
Chapter 3: Eory and Kori have a really interesting dynamic as well. You can feel his pain and suffering, especially with her harshness. But at the same time he cannot help but love her. I feel like this is something that he will deal with in the future: especially for someone who has been locked up for so long. When you are deprived of human contact for so long, won't that make it easier to trust, and easier to love people?

[Schwarze_Neko]

Thank you very much! ^^ I'm really glad to hear that you like the characters. Also thanks on the feedback of the content of the chapters. I'll try to make each chapter more full of content & dialogue ^^

[ExA]

Thank you.I will fix it later...You are really help me.
Love you.

[ratscout]

Oh my gosh! Thank you so much for reading it and for your very kind feedback! I'm glad you can tell the amount of time I've put into it (I really do try so hard! XD) and that I could convey what I wanted to convey with the story. Thanks so much again for taking the time to read it!

I really loved your story, as well!

[anmitsuu]

I like the simplicity of your comic. It takes a simple premise and expands it to the extent that you've managed to completely surround your comic off this game. It's really creative and easy to follow, despite having no dialogue. I definitely feel like there's an old fashioned feel to this comic, like when your characters lift a sign to point out that he's looking through the barrel of a canon. I really enjoy this style of back and forth, and can totally see why people like it!

[anmitsuu]

Ew humidity. Lol. BTW how did you get so many subscribers in such a short amount of time! I'm jealous, tell me your secrets T^T
Prologue: A very simple and effective way to capture your audience's attention. I often find that people who launch straight into the action tend to over do / over explain but you did a great job with the ambiguity.
Chapter 1: Your chapters are short but make for an easy read with the organization. I love the little kitty and it's descriptions but I would recommend you to explain what a soot sprite is, or at least just say 'like soot' when describing the cat. I love the Ghibli reference but I'm not sure everyone would understand what that is when reading it. You say that he feels "pure fear" but do not divulge into what this pure fear is. I would love for you to describe this sensation of fear since you're very good with descriptions. What does it make him feel, not being able to move his body? Certainly scared but does he feel like he's going to die? A shadowy figure on top him is something that he would be fearful of, but does it make his breath hitch? What does he think? Maybe he isn't scared because he goes through it so much , etc etc.
Chapter 2: You should describe how long the trip from Bluff to Stewart island is. This kid is nosy af, what does he look like? I think it's funny that you included his inner dialogue, lmao. I was going to ask why he was telling the kid so much.

[anmitsuu]

Hi! As much as I would love to review some of the older content, I would have absolutely no idea what's going on because your comic is rather long. :(( I'm sorry. I can however comment on some of the art style in your new comic! But none of the actual content content , ya know?
Starting off there's some Steven universe vibes for sure. Not that I've actually watched that show but it totally looks like the art style (with your own individual quirks) It also reminds me of Gravity Falls, lolol. However as you go on with your comic you've seemed to find your own style. It feels more unique and less like you're mirroring something (whether this is intentional or unintentional, I cannot tell). You've done a really good job with improving the lighting in some of your older comics to now. At times it feels unnecessary and awkward, but I can see very clearly what the main purpose of the lighting is, and what to focus on while looking at some of your newer chapters. I also love the change in font that you've made, this time it's way more clear and easier to read. I think you've done a great job here, and within the years that you've been on tapas you've definitely grown. You should be really proud of yourself.

[R.n.P]

Thank you for the feedback, glad you enjoyed it and it gave a good impression to you

[KhanSpring]

Here, it's been raining very heavy
If you find time to read my fantasy novel, Daystar, please do. Hope you enjoy it.
Stay safe!

Daystar (Dennica) | Tapas

[Hutch-Comics]

Thank you for your kind words, and power to Monkey Moo!!

[WhoDrew]

This should help tickle you funny bone

Here are my comics, hope you like them.

Name: Gamers Guff

Genre: Comedy

Summary: Meet Dave and Ryan, two brothers who are as polar opposite as you can imagine. But the one thing they both have in common, they both love video games. However, in their case, they don't just play the games, they literally go inside the games themselves. This results in a variety adventures(or misadventures) with these guys. Enter the marvellous and insane worlds of Gamers Guff!!!

Why should you read it?
It's simply good for a laugh

Gamers Guff | Tapas

Best Example

https://tapas.io/episode/1775200

Name: Online Hassle

Genre: Comedy

Summary: Welcome to the city of Newsfeed, a world populated with citizens who all resemble various mobile phones. They are all tasked with the most tedious and menial job you can imagine.

Why should you read it?
It's simply good for a laugh

Online Hassle | Tapas

Best Examples

https://tapas.io/episode/1839596

[montrasimartina]

Thank You so much for the opportunity! ^^
This is mine:

An Intern's Tale | Tapas

[jcmraz]

Thank you I've spent a lot of time working on the magic system and the way it interacts with the culture of the world. There are definitely explanations coming In Chapter 0 I wanted to spend more time showing some of those things more than leading with big expository conversations that characters that already understand the mechanics wouldn't really have. "In this world..." "we both know that..." etc lol A short explanation for you because you were so kind The gloves are called Gauntlets and work effectively similar to a Macro you might set on a keyboard for a game. Basically there are a limited amount of slot that can be set to be cast quickly. The little cylinder is called a Spellbook. This has the longer and more complete list of spells they would have access to. But try scrolling through that to find the right spell when you're in a situation or running. The spheres that get mentioned are topographical circles that surround the sources of Mana. As you get further from sources the magic gets weaker and at certain points you lose access to certain types of magic altogether.

You know, you aren't the first one to think that dino monster is cute lol Might have to show more of that creature in the future People tended to like it.

[Gudfish]

Always down for feedback/suggestions. I will take a look at yours as well!

Eats, Shoots & Leaves | Tapas

[RedMoonDragon]

Here's a long bingable webcomic if you're up for a challenge. 380+ pages strong and still going.

Universe Jumper | Tapas