Edgy one liners

[Im_moron]

TLDR: basically, I'm playing a joke, semi serious D&D character, where the gag is, he appears like a totally normal Aasimar
till he enters combat

then he becomes a full-on edge lord in combat, where it's so over the top, it becomes funny...
and I need help making funny one liners for him...

---

Fallen aasimar from volo's for a sasuke esk demon transformation, where literal edge bursts forth from his body
eldritch knight, to become the master of the 7ft long katana (greatsword), and to misty step behind enemies and say "it wasn't personhelle kid" and flavor every spell as secret Katana techniques (Burning hands, fire blade swipe technique)

additionally, he wears a trenchcoat and in the first combat of the game, I pulled out an actual fedora to start the initiative (table laughed their ass off)

I am playing a joke character, where the joke is, he's so edgy and over the top, it borders between badassery and absolute comedy... but that's all my jokes in the first session...

with all my jokes gone...

I need more ways to keep Jerry funny, so far, I'm using edgy one-liners, where the edge is so over the top, it's stupid and funny

gimme some sick lines for mah boi Jerry...

some background for his character...

Campaign setting he is in, ww2 alternative history, Jerry physically cannot wear armor because of this, as guns completely ignore it, so he sticks with trenchcoat and fedora... maaaaayyybe the tough feat, but who knows...

Criminal (mercenary), arrested by the military during alcohol boycott, DM literally made him a prodigy as piloting as that is my role (also we rolled for who would be lieutenant, and now I apparently am a lieutenant, also I'm apparently promoted to captain and shiz, and own the skies... might work on that...part of it is because Jerry is learning magic from someone in france and he's sharing the long-dead art with the military and all that jazz so yeah...)
Jerry is a fallen angel because his mafia adopted father is a demon named constatine that turned him into a fallen...
also parents dead because of edge...
Jerry is from Manhattan and has a bit of a new york accent... so it would help if you tried writing those lines in that accent? kinda tough to explain how it sounds...

also, personality wise?
Jerry is actually goofy and more like a jock and atypical captain, till he enters a fight, and puts on a fedora, then becomes full on edgelord...

pride complex, uses sheer badassery to intimidate enemies, only cares for money, power, and wealth (edge mode or not)

still, gentlemen because he wears a fedora

has the current title of "Captain DARK CUT ROSE" and his sword "Shadow slicer"

example quotes would be like "Hey, it's ya boi Jerry!"
"Houws it goin'? ya killed that man like I asked co pilot admiral Ben?"
edge mode "see this sword here? it's a Katana, that name means "Japanese sword" and I have exactly 9 ways to kill you with it..."
Teleports behind Nazi
"here's one of them"

"the cost of moving faster than the speed of light is that you can only reside in darkness"
misty steps behind Nazi "Nothing personelle"

strikes target with booming blade "this is my booming blade technique" proceeds to exposition the spell description of booming blade

(Inspirations for this character, the shadow blade series)

[DiegoPalacios]

Alright, let`s get some one-liners!

1-Heard an awesome one in a forum, this is the adapted versión for your character:
When confronting a gang/organization or whatever....ask who is in charge. After they answers, say: "Wrong!, i`m in charge now" (using a mind control ability is optional but recomended if possible.)

2-(because the character is a fallen angel) "forgive them father, because they don`t know who they are messing with"

3-"your screams shall be silenced by my blade"

4-When someone treatens your character: "you already died the second you decided to fight me"

5-When a villain asks for mercy: (slices him in half) "a quick death is a merciful death"

6-When atacking a politician/someone of status: "You think you have power?, all these flags, medals, crown are useless when facing a blade.....this is true power!!"

7-When an enemy fails an atack: "is that your best?, you make me laugh......now i will make you cry"

8- "No one understands my pain because i express it in metaphors that are too deep for common understanding"

edit: i`m gonna use some of them in my current or future comics(depending of which fits), but if it is for fun D&D campaign purposes have fun using them

[A-weird-girler]

"Nothing personal, kiddo"

[DiegoPalacios]

Everytime you greet someone, say in a cocky-intense tone "long time no see (insert name of the person you are talking)

This video has a reference

Everything about this song are edgy one-liners

[TimCaloweh]

Take rotary phone and say, "Death's on the line." Then he smashes the guys face in.

[awesomefeelsman]

I've come to understand the nature of edgelordism through continuously watching youtube videos and here are my possible edgy lines to add XD

1. (To Nazi enemy)
   You know, I never tried making German Sushi before so bear with me if my cuts look uneven.

Hey, wanna meet your former leader?

1. (To a muscular zombie)
   Yo maggot brain, wanna get ripped?
   (Has multiple meanings. Ripped as in sliced by his blade, rip like rest and peace and then ripped because the zombie is buffed.)

2. (to an enemy of the opposite sex)
   I like you. And I don't like liking things.

It's a full moon tonight and you look like your doing fine, but I'm prone to make things bleed so let's skip the chocolates. (Unseaths katana) hope you packed lots of lady band aids coz things are about to get messy.

Late for your date with death? Well, let me escort you there then.

1. (To common enemy)
   Oh, look, a walking training dummy.

I hate tutorial phases.

Wanna see something cool?
(Whips out katana and proceeds to slice enemy like butter. Enemy then explodes.)

[indigodrawing]

Did you ever watch Kung-Fury?

Alternatively, there's the "character" of O'Malley from Red Vs. Blue.

"Prepare to taste oblivion! Which tastes just like Red Bull!"

[Im_moron]

@DiegoPalacios @awesomefeelsman
I'm officially gonna play sonic forces - Infinite when I perform his Sasuke esk demon transformation...

also those lines are rather fitting, adding them to the list

"excuse me if my cuts arent clean..."

looks up to the sky to talk to eldritch knight master

"sorry master, I'm gonna have to go all out on this one"

activates Dark Ascension, aka aasimar necrotic Cloud move

[DiegoPalacios]

for a more serious treat: (teleports behind enemy): "i would normally say nothing personal, kiddo.... But this time.....everything is personal." (unleash ultimate power)

For enemies you can beat in a round: (throws fedora in the air) "in the time my fedora goes back into the ground i will slay all of you" (procceed to do that, and when fedora is falling, nonchalantly catch it in the air)

[Im_moron]

actually gonna be tough to make use of the last line, as I can't properly gague if I can kill an enemy in one hit, unless I am confident I'll roll high for the attack...

also no threat is serious for me... unless it's a government official with dark magic, eck my bad, I mean dork magic.

also using sonic forces infinity

also just noticed your lines in the first comment, tAKING nOTES

@awesomefeelsman

[awesomefeelsman]

The numbering order got a little scrabbled, it wasn't like that when I was writing it XD

[TimCaloweh]

The guy sits over his enemy with his fist ready for punching.

"Some may have told you you're incapable of taking a few punches. But just know..."

He starts whaling on him.

"I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!!!"