Emotional Support/Advice Thread

[dawgofdawgness]

Ghostie, you’re a hilarious and quirky person (ghost), im sorry anxiety’s keeping you from reaching out to other people
Do you have a teacher you can trust (I think I remember you naming one of them, didja get in contact with them?) That might help a little bit with the parent issue. Sorry you’re stuck in a pickle. The school nurse can also be really great.

[gh0stcr33p]

I'm seriously too scared to go up to a teacher or nurse and talk to them

[dawgofdawgness]

I wish I could teleport to where you are and help you..
Tell you what, have you tried writing an email to them? It’s so much better than talking to adults irl

[gh0stcr33p]

I don't know... ik my way of thinking is really off but I just think that could come off as gay or something..
(edit) I know it's weird of me to think that

[gh0stcr33p]

yeah..never mind. I'm probably not gonna accept help anyways

[DiegoPalacios]

Hi ghostieblu, i know interacting with people in person can feel awkward sometimes (specially if you don`t know the person). What helped me was reading some self-help books like "how to talk to anyone" from Leil Lowndes, And "the power of now".

Also, in the recent years i met lots of people going to Kenjutsu classes. You could go to a class of something of your interest and in the proccess meet people with the same interests.

Hope this helps!

[ChanYE]

hey thanks for taking the time out of your day to reply.

Take time to figure out why you're failing

ive multiple reasons why but i know only one can be fixed. the others kinda wherent up to me.
(if you want to know why basically ive got a class where i feel its kind of messy, i cant describe it. the teacher helps you with assignments but she doesnt.. teach. and the other part is me just waiting to the last minute to do her work because i hate doing it.

and the roomate thing... seniors from last year came back to my school to give a discussion on what college is like for them anddd most of them hate it. its either because of terrible roomates, or realizing the professors threw work at them and did not hold their hand.

Use campus mental health programs. Free counseling is super important

thanks for reminding me i gotta see if the college im looking at rn has one. they offer everything else

thanks for the tips! ill look for a animal shelter to volunteer for. over there. i did in my area but they never got back to me rip...

my dog is very old, like 12 years old. only recently have me and my family noticed hes going deaf. we already trained him but when we tell him to sit or come he doesnt listen. so i have to rely heavily on physical language with him. hes always been grumpy but not this evil. he growls and anyone and everyone. my mom already booked an appointment to see wtf is going on with him.

[zuggarts]

@ghostieblu Have you heard of this site called '7 Cups of Tea'? I haven't been on there for a few years so I don't know if it's taken a turn, but from what I remember it was really effective for me in dealing with my anxiety and depression back in high school. You are anonymously linked to a volunteer 'listener' to whom you can just spill your guts about life--they are trained to listen to you without judgement and provide you with support (they are also moderated and reviewed by the community, so it's unlikely that you get matched with someone who is just there to troll--I know because I used to be a listener there when the site was first established). It's very useful especially if you feel as though you have nobody in real life to talk to about these problems. Give it a shot, and same goes to anyone else who is having problems on this thread.

@ChanYE Really sorry that you're feeling this way. College can be a really rough transitional period for a lot of people, but know that you'll grow so much as a person coming out of it. It's easy to get overwhelmed, so maybe try not to think about too many things. Try meditation and some mindfulness techniques; focus your all on one thing at a time--it really helps to reduce the mental 'clutter' that comes with anxiety.

If you want some tips on dealing with finances in college to avoid debt, PM me? I have been neurotically avoiding debt so far in my second year and on-track with things, maybe I could be of help in some way? It's a long shot but I'd be glad to help if I could.

[gh0stcr33p]

thanks. I'll take a look at the website

[Shanny8]

Nothing super bad, just kinda bummed coz this particular commission(artist) I really wanted for some bonus content of my printed comic isnt going to happen for this particular issue. I already found out in estimating my order that I now have 2 pages that I needed to fill; now I gotta replace this artist(the artist offered a refund, which I'm not gonna do coz I feel this artist is really good)...I'll just use their art in the next printed installment of my comic.

[MayelV]

Hi ghostie. I have been diagnosed with adhd and social anxiety. I'm an adult and I still struggle and I believe I am going to struggle for the rest of my life.
I went through something similar in school and what really helped were online friends. I did feel safer talking to them, even to a complete stranger in a forum. You can try the 7 Cups of Tea site, I tried but I was too anxious when they talked to me so I quit. Later on, I tried going to a psychiatrist and he gave me meds that worked for a while but I also quit because the side effects were very uncomfortable, like having your mouth dry and your ears plugged all the time. Also looking and feeling like I had no soul.

I do feel better now and let me tell you why, because I accepted my reality. I accepted that no one is going to help me the way I needed it, so I tried looking out for myself. When it comes to talking to people, I have to assimilate that THEY ARE NOT JUDGING ME. That I AM NOT THEIR CENTER OF ATTENTION, so it's fine to talk to them, normally. A thing that helped me in a lot of ways were getting a dog and tutoring. You read that right! Going out with my dog has helped me interact with people more because they approach me, asking if they can pet my dog. I even made a couple of acquaintances that way! And tutoring has given me a confidence boost because it has tricked my brain into thinking that the person I'm tutoring knows that I'm in charge. I also switched those awful meds for natural remedies that reduce stress and anxiety like GABA (gamma-aminobutyric acid).

I hope my experiences can help you in a way, I really do. Try whatever you need to try, but do it. And stick to whatever works for you, even if it's logging into a website and rambling or going out with a dog. Mental and physical activity is key!

Virtual hugs, buddy <3

[dawgofdawgness]

I can’t tell if other people are intentionally trying to hurt me or not. Whenever one of my friends ignores me or something there’s this sharp stabbing pain in my chest and I start overthinking the situation and assume the worst. And it’s always about some stupid small thing (that I later realize is really unimportant) that I completely freak out over. My therapist told me to try not to skip to conclusions all the time but I can’t help but realize that no matter how hard I try, nobody will give a shit about me.
I get it. That’s how human nature works, you want to fulfil your own needs before helping someone else. But gosh darn it i feel horribly lonely all the time because nobody can really truly understand what I’m feeling. Their words are empty, like “feel better soon” or “you are not alone”. And then. Somebody tells me “don’t worry millions of others ryeenagers also have depression” I don’t give a SHIT. Can you please just talk to me? About anything? Theyre not even trying to be subtle about avoiding me either. It’s almost as if they want me to die.

[VibrantFox]

i was feeling like this earlier today actually. it's weird actually saying it someplace but i kind a broke down for a bit posted something dumb on my fb and surprisingly got an answer. i felt stupid because in that moment before i was sure no one cared. i haven't talked to these friends in years but just seing a response made me cry again cuz i was sure they didn't care. sometimes you get people who care and some who donn't and i'm really sorry if those time where you're hoping for someone to reach out and they don't. i dont have a therapist or whoever to tell me what's wrong but i recognize some of my symptoms and try to work with that.

I seriously hope that you don't think people want you gone. even when it does feel that way it's not. people care even if it's not shown and even though some of us are just "strangers on the internet" we care too. i've made good friends and we'd stay up just talking stuff out just being there so don't feel alone and if you've got to work out those negative emotions i hope your able to do so safely. i'm a pretty awkward person usually but i'm here if you need someone to chat with and i really hope you'll be okay.

[LCT_m_a_d]

Something I started doing years ago, and i still do now is go to the same local coffee shop and read my favorite books. I'm not the most confident person socially, but I feel somewhat protected by the staff who knows me as a regular. Sometimes people I've never met before will see Im reading and take the initiative of breaking the ice, but on my terms. The great thing is I can be social or retreat at the same time If I feel so inclined.

[LCT_m_a_d]

Nobody is going through the same struggles as you. It's true that everyone is fighting battles and it is comforting to know that many have found ways to overcome seemingly insurmountable obtacles. However, it's important to know that we should move at our own pace and you deserve to climb your own latter of healing. No one has the authority to dismiss your struggles for you.

[lunaartemisasama]

That's the spirit, Don't give a shit!!!

Also this is from one of my favourite artists Destiny Blue

[DiegoPalacios]

Hi Dawg.

I wish i could do more about it to help you

Sometimes, when a person has depression, they see things in a more negative light. I know is hard when the brain tells you "they are ignoring you/ they hate you", but you have to take a deep breath and try to clear your mind. You must try to distinguish when logic and emotions are not aligned, for example those jumas into conclusions caused by anxiety.

Please remember your first priority now is to recover from depression. Your health comes first. Talk to your family about it. Sometimes people can`t help if someone doesnt ask for it. (i know you are asking for help here, but maybe your family can help too)

Hope you get better soon and take care okay?

(insert hug of emotional support)

[ISNEKO]

I'm fucking miserable all the damn time and THINGS HAVE BEEN LOOKING UP LATELY.

I just paid off a loan. I've paid my rent on time twice after six months of falling behind. I recently hit 1k subs. My 25yrold truck is finally running thru daily use without shitting on me. I finally got my kids to play a game with me (Path of Exile). MY CATS STOPPED BEING ASSHOLES AND TEARING UP MY PROPERTY.

But I'm sad. All of the time. And every stupid thing triggers it. My head takes every situation or feeling, no matter how mediocre, and drags it into the damn ground as if I just killed my family. Every time I try and sit down to write I waste a couple hours beating myself up saying that everything I'm writing is utter garbage. Even tho I can pay my bills I'm more upset than ever about money.

Was it because I was drowning before? Do I need to be on the brink of destruction to feel focused and find moments of happiness? What the fuck is wrong with my head! And all of this manifests into being angry and distant. Thank goodness I don't have to be nice at work. I'm not going to chitchat with you, old man. Here's your stupid bolts now get out of my hardware store.

Jesus-fucking-ass-christ I hate being awake right now.

I'm just moaning into this thread because I don't have anyone to talk to about it. I asked a friend (not her fault. this is a loaded subject and she's not really good for this sort of thing) and she was like, "I'm sorry dude, but, you've actually been an upset person for as long as I've known you. This seems like your normal."

Are you fucking joking? I've achieved my normal, horrible self?

[ChristodeBoyet]

This ain't no motivational speech because I can't do that right, ever. I just find what you're saying relatable.

It seems you thrive on living your life struggling. That could be because of those small moments that make you happy, and I mean small, as if they pass you by in a second. Though small they are, it's because of the time you spent waiting for them that makes you feel them. So what if you're a natural downer. The ups are great when they happen, although the downs feel consistent. It just means you have lower expectations, you noticed all the good things that have happened for you. You saw them, took note of them, and though you may be down now, when the next one comes by you'll see it again.

I would like to say that even though you're angry and distant, it's only because you're getting ready for something better. But I don't know that, however, it's okay either way. You likely distance yourself because that's what you're used to doing. It'll fade the less you think about it.

Honestly, I don't know if any of that was helpful. Short version: you're okay as you are, you noticed the good things, you'll get up again.

[DiegoPalacios]

Hi Isneko

Maybe you should go and see a psychologist. You may have Depression. (The psychologist can tell better than me if that is the problem)

If that is the problem, i can tell you from experience that depression has a solution. Some family members had it and overcame it. It took time and effort, but is possible.

Don't blame yourself. Depression is never the depressed person's fault. You wouldn't blame yourself for a random concrete block falling over you in the forest.

If it turns out it is not depression, maybe is the need for something new. A little break in the routine or trying a new hobby may help.

But the best way to know for sure is to go and see a doctor.

Hope you feel better soon.