@RainbowCat Prologue and chapter 1:
The narrator's voice is really strong, it makes the story feel a bit detached(?). The tenses feel weird to me but I can't pinpoint why. Jason feels older than Scarlet, much older, and it feels like there will be a romance between them so that makes me a bit uncomfortable(read up to and including episode 2 so far, the episode where they meet and she collapses).
Chapter 2: The development feels a bit awkward but then again, I'm a real fan of slowburns so take that with a grain of salt. I really like the detail of nobody changing Scarlet's clothes while she slept, however. It feels like the obvious thing to do yet many characters don't get the same courtesy.
Chapter 3: Just as I liked how they didn't touch her clothes while she was unconcious, I don't like how people are entering her space without waiting for a reply or warning. They can tell she's traumatised and are being kind about it but they missed the memo about doors for some reason.
Chapter 4: It might be because of my own ideas about how a traumatised person would act/how one should act around a traumatised person but the actions of all the characters feels a bit off to me, personally. For example, I would not leave someone going through a panic attack. I would sit on the floor and make myself as small as possible without seeming meek and let them get used to my presence. I don't think this would work for everyone, however. Just sth to keep in mind. Also, I think I might be shipping Oren and Scarlet. He's much more gentle and closer to her age.
Chapter 5: I don't, don't, like Jason so far. I understand that he needs to be guarded as the leader but there are better ways of doing it. Then again, he's stressed. I guess he's doing his best.
Final thoughts: After reading all six episodes, the story feels a little off due to the reasons I listed above but I can tell what you're going for. I'm sure you can make it clearer with some polishing. Thank you once again for waiting so patiently and good luck with your writing!
@rosierubycardinal it's your story next. I would like to take a breather before I dive in so that I can focus more. I will let you know my feedback once I'm done reading.