How do you tone yourself down?

[DokiDokiTsuna]

Vague title is vague...I mean, for example, what do you do when someone asks you to look at their art/writing, and the first thing that pops into your head is "this is straight garbage"??

What's your thought process for turning that knee-jerk reaction into a constructive criticism...or at least a non-insult?
Preferably without making yourself into a total fake...I've always been wary of those "I think your art is cute!!1! <3 Keep on improving~!" comments under a piece that clearly has a lot of problems...

(I sincerely hope this isn't just a 'me' problem...I always knew in my heart that I was mean but I'd hate to think I'm the meanest one here...)

[craftymarten]

You can like someone's work without thinking it's perfect. Naïve art can be cute and fun without being technically accurate.
Honestly, I think there's redeeming qualities in everyone's work. at least if nothing else they're trying.
Tearing someone down is very rarely going to help them improve, if they even want to improve. Maybe they're happy with how they draw. If they want critique I normally focus on the big issues and leave the smaller ones, in so many beginner artists it's the proportions and perspective that are wrong. It can make a whole piece look off but it's really only a problem with 1 or 2 things (even if they're big things to learn). Saying "this is bad" helps no one and makes the other person feel bad so what's the point?
In the end if you can't say anything nice or constructive just move on.

[DarkerMagic]

Okay, you cannot and should not EVER tell someone their work is straight up garbage. It's downright disrespectful. I mean, you wouldn't want someone to say that to you, would you? (Speaking as someone who has experienced this first hand.)

What you can do is give them CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. Something that will help them GROW as a writer. Tearing them apart may help you vent your frustration but it's not going to help them IMPROVE. If anything, it's going to discourage them from continuing at all.

When you get that knee-jerk reaction, sit back and THINK about what SPECIFICALLY makes it bad. Is it the characters? Is it the plot? Is it the plot AND the characters? Is it the worldbuilding? Is it the grammar?

Once you've figured that out, IN SPECIFICS, you can figure out how they need to improve:

• If the character is lacking in depth, then figure out what makes them feel like a cardboard cut-out. Is it that they feel like a YA female protagonist who has no motivation but to find the next love interest (Achievement unlocked: you found the love interest. Game over!)? Is it that they're a Mary Sue with no flaws? Is it that they have no clear motivation in general? Are the characters inconsistent? etc. etc.

• If the plot is lacking, ruminate over the possibility that it could also be a character problem because almost all good stories are driven by good characters. If it's not the characters that are the problem, ask yourself: is the story cliche? Does it grip the reader? Does the story suffer from a lack of suspense? Does a story suffer from lack of CLEAR plot? etc. etc.

• If the worldbuilding is lacking, you can ask yourself questions like: are the rules of this world unclear? Are the rules of magic unclear? Does the story only offer one type of lens to view this world through and the author doesn't show us the full scope? etc. etc.

• If it's the grammar, you need to ask if the person is a native English speaker. Normally, when the author is not a native English speaker there are lots of grammar errors. If they're just lazy, that's WHOLE other issue.

• If it's the drawing style, that's your problem.

Once you've figured out the SPECIFIC problems and questions you have with the story you can write a clear, concise review of the story that's not tearing into someone's story and just telling them "this is straight garbage."

Of course, there are those stories that are just not readable. You don't have to read those because the best rule to follow: if you have NOTHING good to say, don't say anything.

[J.Lovelace]

Just be polite, choose your words carefully and sprinkle it with some encouraging words at the end. If you can't be positive about it, better be neutral than straight out negative.

[Kelheor]

First of all I'm thinking, that while I may think this art is not well done, someone might think the same about mine.

Then I look closely and try to find some objectively good things! It may be (almost) clean line art, the colours may be quite good or at least be in harmony with each other, shadows may not be done in black colour or light might be done right, the attention to details can be great.

Comments like "your art is cute" are okay of course, but when someone actually asking about your opinion on what they are doing, it is probably better to concentrate on good things and then give them advice on things they can improve. Not in the "what the hell is with this scribble, are you calling that a face" way, but some actual advice about improving this or that.

[Azifri]

I don't think too much about it: if I don't like it or don't have anything useful to say, I just walk away. Also, unless asked, I don't give criticism or technical comments. Asking to look at their stuff does not equal criticism request to me.

[punkarsenic]

it very much depends on the situation - face to face im less likely to provide constructive criticism bc i cant think on my feet like that. online i can take the minute to develop a compliment sandwich - theres always something to compliment

if its someone young &/ beginning (say, my cousins who are still kids) ill generally go like 'wow! i love the red! you know what, you should read the book [x], i think youre ready for it.' or '(ditto), have you ever tried [thing that will move them forward, like drawing from life]?'

i like reframing constructive criticism from 'heres how to fix your weaknesses' to 'heres how to take what youre doing further / how to take it to the next step.' it focuses on the positive

though if its a simple technical error like spelling, default red, bubble composition ill prolly just be like 'hey. dont do that. do this'

[unknown_user]

Very good question!

First of all, when you are requested to criticize the story, which seems like a garbage to you, I'd advice to not answer instantly. Emotional talk will not bring any good in such a situation. So I'd advice to take your time, calm down and let the first wave of negative emotions pass away, before giving a criticism.
Also I appreciate the consequent approach of @DarkerMagic . If you'll decompose criticized story into the set of distinct aspects and evaluate each of them separately, it really can help to make your critique more informative and useful for the author. Also it may help you to surprisingly find out, that not all of these aspects are so bad, as you've thought at first.

[Cavechan]

That's just your initial reaction. It happens to everyone where you glance at something and instantly determine it is garbage, but that doesn't mean there isn't merit. You have to look past the "garbage" and find the biggest things that the person can improve upon. Are they pressing the pen/pencil too hard? That is a common mistake with beginning artists. Is the shading off? Awkward pose?

I know it's best when criticizing to give some negatives and some positives. If no positives can be found, then just try to give one or two succinct ways to improve.

[DiegoPalacios]

i only give advice when asked to do it because i don`t know how the person will react. When i give criticism, i focus on what they could improve.

If i don`t have anything helpful to say i dont say anything. And only give feedback on things i know about.

[LCT_m_a_d]

I think about my own situation and treat it as an opportunity to break the cycle lol.

I usually mention one thing I do like that they do and encourage them to focus on that.

[jurinova]

I don't think there's such a thing as garbage... No wait, Duchamp's Fountain exists...

No but, seriously though! People are at different stages in their artistic path, so try not to think of something as garbage but as something that is still developing. Of course we can all be mean in our heads but try to learn how to look at things from a different perspective in order to not let those mean thoughts be the only ones. Always try to find something supportive to say, and then you can also add critique if you think it's necessary.

If at first you stuggle finding something supportive to say you can always ask questions. Not like "What is that supposed to be?" but rather questions that will help you see what the person was trying to achieve or what technique they used etc. This will give you time to think about what to say and you can also learn what to give advice on. Not to mention that people usually quite enjoy it when someone asks them questions about their work.

There's no need to praise everyone's work but it's polite to be kind. Even something as simple as "Good work!" can be enough.

[ble]

This post was flagged by the community and is temporarily hidden.

[LCT_m_a_d]

Duchamp really made a mess out of his art career lol

[indagold]

Depends with my friends, if i'm bored i'll just say its nice, feeling more energetic might critique it or just roast it cause they don't care anyway, they roast my art too.

Strangers I just assume they're spammers? Every person who did that with me just wants attention and views and its annoying. They never seem genuine.

[Kat]

I'm not a huge fan of false praise, but I have learned that there's something praiseworthy in most work, even if it's just "I can see you're passionate about this!" A couple things that help me:

-Most people are not stagnant. A "crappy" artist today may end up completely surpassing you and leaving you in the dust. Have you ever seen the old sketches from really skilled artists? Often they're pretty hideous. Obviously they didn't stay there, so remember people grow and consider their potential.

-People can only take so much criticism at a time. It can be tempting to rip a piece apart with every single thing that's wrong, but that's not only demoralizing for most people, but too much for them to even process all at once. I try to focus on just a couple of aspects that need the most improvement, and say "Start here- work on this. Then come back and we'll talk about something else you can work on."

[qwerty]

Generally I try to just pick one or two specific issues that I think are the most important and mention those. Even if there are a thousand other issues, they'll figure the rest out on their own over time. You don't have to be comprehensive in order to be helpful, and anyway they're more likely to actually apply the advice if it's manageable.

Also if there's anything good (even something small) I'll often mention it too. Knowing what you did right is as important as knowing what you did wrong. And encouragement can matter just as much as practical advice

[inkythoughts]

I think I read this even here in a forum thread where a writing teacher didn't say "this is bad" but asked "how can we fix this?" and I think this is a very good way of thinking.
There are things that are literally overdone in the creative field, but somehow you still find something with exactly this trope that is genuinely good and works with the trope so well that you don't care because everything else just works with it, and I think you can apply this to literally everything. Ask yourself what and how you'd want to fix their art. If the proportions feel off, tell them and maybe also offer advice on how to fix it (look at references, try figure drawing, I got this tutorial which might help you construct a pose better, yadda yadda) - this isn't necessarily necessary for more seasoned artists as they usually know about how to fix it themselves/which resources to look up but we sometimes just need a reminder that we aren't perfect either and to occassionally check upon our proportions etc. as well.
I'm not really into "sugarcoating" things but that doesn't mean you should get insulting or demeaning either.
Art is all about practice and evolving over time, so the one thing I'd ask you to not do is telling people they'll "never be as good as _ " or could never do X, because that's just discouraging and plain wrong.

[SleepingPoppy]

What's your thought process for turning that knee-jerk reaction into a constructive criticism...or at least a non-insult? Preferably without making yourself into a total fake...I've always been wary of those "I think your art is cute!!1! <3 Keep on improving~!" comments under a piece that clearly has a lot of problems...

A good start would be understanding what an art critique really is. If the only things you can think of to say are insulting, you should say nothing. Insults don't help people get better. Calling someones work garbage won't make them a better writer or artist. You have to actually identify specific things they can do better, and talk about that. Where can they improve? If there's a lot that needs improving, maybe pick just a few that stand out.

It's also good practice to mix in a couple positives with your negative. When you go at someone with negative criticism, even if it's true, you run the risk of them becoming defensive, and defensive people don't absorb good advice. Think about professional teachers- the good ones will always look for ways to encourage their students and help them be better.

People come to art at ALL stages of ability. We should respect that, and if you don't want to help them on their journey, then you don't need to be critiquing them.

[phen]

i like reframing constructive criticism from 'heres how to fix your weaknesses' to 'heres how to take what youre doing further / how to take it to the next step.' it focuses on the positive

This is the crucial bit to take away for "toning yourself down", definitely agree with general positivity. Especially when interacting with individuals who are new to the scene or are hyper modest.

Constructive criticism isn't always good for everyone and it can be just as hard to dole out as it is to take. Therefore, it's marginally better to offer positive reinforcement. Delve into their work for just a few moments, you'll be able to pick out that which is important to them. PRAISE IT. Effort is effort, yo, we can all respect that, yeah? There's nothing more emboldening than your hard work being recognised.