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Endrenesk
Nov '16

Dear god, I hope I don't have to post here again, it's kinda embarrassing how many times I've written without having even started. If you've read from me before, you know what I'm talking about.
Today, I'll be asking about Motive, Psychology, and some other miscellaneous things.
Because it's my most developed concept, I'll be using Sole Error as the subject of problem.

To start off with, I need to explain why I don't know what I'm doing.
As I've recently explained, Sole Error is about a group of people stuck in a time loop, one of them is a murderer, and they have to find out the answer in order to escape. However, this isn't quite right. It's like groundhog's day, but everyone is aware of it, not just Bill Murray. Now take that explanation, and swap the memory part with deja vu.
In essence, this means that there are infinite possibilities as to what can happen.

While I can say that I understand my characters, I don't actually have any grasp on the story at all.
My antagonist's motive is lacking, and therefore the reason the characters are in this scenario sounds like an excuse.
"They were bored, so they decided to create a time loop to research how it effects teamwork." -paraphrased, because I don't actually remember the real reason. The only reason I got such a half-assed motive is because the antagonist is a godess. One would think that a godess should know all, no?

I can't move forward with my story, much less understand all my characters as I should, until I have a good reason to tell it by.
Misc.
Also, some of my character's names are wack. Can someone suggest better ones?
Joule (this is the only one not up for change.)
Quo (Shy quiet girl)
Kasulaia (Motherly Bartender)
Mcglyde (Egotistical Not-A-Rockstar-Yet)
Yalka (Negative Actor and Brother of Mcglyde)
Vyryse (Assassin, name similar to a tapastic user, NEEDS change)
Cosmo (Happy go lucky hide the body)
Eric (I actually don't know this character. Uh....)

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    Nov '16

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    Nov '16
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Down_the_Rabbithole
Nov '16

I know this frustration and the only pointer I have to offer is one you probably don't want to hear. Slow down and sit on it.

I sat on my own comic's story for a whole year before I started anything. I ended up completely gutting the story and whole characters before I got what I wanted. You can't force this.

Often times, new ideas come to me while I'm doing mundane tasks and my mind wanders. So just do something that doesn't require creativity like cleaning your room, taking a shower, or lying in bed. Stuff will come.

Take it easy for a while and bounce the ideas that come to you off a friend. Or if you don't have a friend interested in your work, try organizing your thoughts into notes and outlines and see what works and what doesn't. Odds are this won't be the first time you get this frustrated, but you have to tough it out. It just takes time.

And don't be ashamed of weird names. I got a bunch of them.

JessJackdaw
Nov '16

Seriously, mate your names aren't bad at all. Most of my main character's names are basically the same as the prototype names I first gave them... which is to say, I named them all after colors and it just stuck. Sometimes things just feel right. Don't be embarrassed by it at all.

I'm going to second the motion to just sit on it. My story was hot trash for a long time, and really didn't have a direction until I fleshed out the world more and more.

Some stories take time, and a lot of fermented thoughts.

shazzbaa
Nov '16

There's a gazillion ways to come at the question of motive, so there's not really a Correct one -- but one way to consider it would be to consider what role you want the antagonist to have in this story.

Like, is the goddess who set this scenario up really the main characters' Villain, in the sense that they have to overcome this antagonist character? Or are the circumstances (the time-loop and the murder puzzle) the REAL obstacle, and she's just the one who set things up?

Because if it's the latter -- if she's not a major part of the story other than setting it all in motion -- she doesn't need a more complex motive. An answer like "she was just bored" will fall flat if you set it up as a mystery, but if she's a known antagonist, and her simple reasoning -- "I'm bored and I want to watch some violence, have fun" -- is known, then we can accept it and then move on. Our goal now is not to discover or understand her motive, but to escape this mad deity's cruel puzzle. I think trying to set up an interesting motive in a story like that actually misguides the story.
There's a reason why movies like Groundhog Day and Big don't carefully examine the source of their magic -- it would distract from the point of the story, which is dealing with the obstacles created by that magic.

On the other hand, she could be a major part of the story, and her reasoning could play a role. If that's the sort of story you want, but trying to wrangle a motive out of her in a vaccuum is difficult, there are other directions you could come at it. Consider the rest of your story -- what do your characters have to overcome -- like, emotionally, psychologically? Is there anyway she can be a representation of some of that? What direction do you want your story to go? What role do you want her to play in it? If you want the discovery of her motives to be a major push for your characters, then it might make sense to ponder it backwards -- what could they discover that would really change their perceptions, really change the game for them?

Re: Names -- I second the others, there's no objective standard for good names in sci-fi/fantasy stories. I make all my names by mashing syllables together, or staring at lists and lists of baby names, or doing a bit of both.
Plus, these all seem like the same names you had last time you mentioned feeling weird about some of them... just try some different names on, man! If you don't like McGlyde, try calling him Marcus, try calling him Maximus, try calling him Malificium, try calling him Mack. There's no specific, tangible reason why "Inorin" didn't feel right and "Severian" did, for my lead guy -- I just tried out a ton of different names until I found one that felt right.

spooktacularprize
Nov '16

I agree that the level of presence in the story influences whether or not boredom would be a good motivation for the main antagonist character; probably also of note that "boredom" might even be a BETTER motivation for a character that already has enough power, prestige, etc. If she already has magical powers, she wouldn't need that unless there were another motivating factor behind that; but boredom sounds like a plausible explanation for an entity that (I'm assuming) doesn't have regular contact with humans. As shazzbaa said, maybe flesh this out a little bit if you're going to have a final conflict with her, or if she's going to be a major presence or character at the end o the story, but otherwise, I'd say, the puzzle/mystery aspect of the story sounds really intriguing and engaging in a way that you could just leave the motivation of the villain less develoed.

As for names, you can really go with anything! If you want it to "fit" with the aura and feel of your story, then think about what the setting is..but even this isn't a standard. : )

DavidPerry
Nov '16

All right, this looks like a bit of a project. So let's dive in.

First, if you can't pitch your concept in a three-sentence paragraph, it's too convoluted. You can broaden it as the actual story unfolds, but there needs to be a simple but engaging foundation. What is the theme? What is this story REALLY about? That's what you need to nail down. Often it comes in the form of an abstraction: love, revenge, redemption, etc. Once you know this, you've got a good jump on motivation.

That said, you need to SLOW DOWN. It sounds like your standing over the kettle and chucking assorted spices with reckless abandon, hoping that the bubbling conconction tastes like something recognizable as stew. You really need to scale back and prepare. Who is your main character? What do they want? Start there.

Good stories start with good characters, not cool concepts. That comes after you've humanized your cast.

That said, a character's motivation is what makes us empathize with them--even a sympathetic villain. And if your villain's motivation is boredom, guess what? We feel bored. Boredom is a motivation for comedy, not drama. Give your villain something real. Something strong that we can latch onto. Here's why, and this is VERY IMPORTANT:

MOTIVATION DRIVES ACTION.

If your motivation is boredom, you've got nothing driving the action! The least motivated a person can get is literally a desire to do... "whatever."

Now that I've addressed what I believe to be the heart of your problem, I'll get into the other stuff. The concept, convoluted as it is, does sound cool. Don't mistake that for "ready." Let's try this:

"After a grizzly murder, a group of scientists stumble into a time rift that forces them to return to a critical moment over and over. They can change the course of time, but the only way out is to discover the identity of the killer--who may be closer than they think."

That's about as simple as I can make it, so that it's easy to understand and pitchable.

As far as the villain's motivation, given the scenario you've outlined, it seems the simplest solution is this: One of the scientists (the murderer) wants credit for the technology all to him/herself. Now, if you want to really spice it up, have other members of the group start getting murdered with each consecutive jump back in time. Now you have another important part of storytelling-- "WHAT'S AT STAKE?" And suspense.

The motivation for the scientists as a whole for creating the technology could be to retroactively prevent murders. A tool for good, but one of them is corrupted by the power. Now you have another great part of storytelling: DRAMATIC IRONY!

I do hope all of this has helped. Just scale it back and rebuild it with your characters foremost in mind. Find out what makes them tick before you put them in any real situation, or you won't know what they're likely to do in that situation.

Mocha
Nov '16

I have had this same problem many times myself, and the only thing I can suggest that has ever worked for me is writing the plot with the end in mind. This basically means to write the story first knowing how you want to have the story end as well as the key points and scenes in the story. You can develop your characters around this too, but try to remain flexible with them and don't make their personalities too set in stone before figuring out the plot. By having overly detail backgrounds for the characters it can hinder the story by cramming in too much information and making scenes seem forced. Hope this helped and good luck! (●´ヮ｀●)b