I'll read and review your First Chapter

kalmia 2023-07-27 01:37:58 UTC #30

I’d love for you to check out mine! I’ll take a look at yours as well!

SereinChoo 2023-07-28 04:46:10 UTC #31

Love the story and the art, looks good but the blurb of your story could be better improve to make it more interesting.

Five years after the disappearance and assumed death of Calix's genius brother. Melody stumbled into Calix's life and together they embark on a journey to find his brother, who Calix believes is trapped inside a mysterious portal. Along the way, they must confront adversaries, face monstrous creatures, and confront their own troubled pasts. Their mission becomes a race against time, as they strive to save Calix's brother and rectify the chaos he has unleashed.

SereinChoo 2023-08-28 03:42:32 UTC #32

Still open - for now. Contact me when you are done with the sub and like.

SereinChoo 2023-08-28 03:52:58 UTC #33

You can also check out my website/blog for more writing tips.
Previously, I have also self published my own children book. If interested, you can check that one out as well.
link: https://sereinchoo.wordpress.com/writing-tips/tips-and-thoughts/

Chocolate 2023-08-28 03:59:20 UTC #34

Okay here’s the first chapter of mine!

TheAuthor 2023-08-28 04:28:51 UTC #35

Sure thing. here is my novel. Hope you like it.

amanwithastick9 2023-08-28 05:35:42 UTC #36

Sure!

SereinChoo 2023-09-01 02:10:07 UTC #37

Sorry can't read - not able to open link to Webtoon

SereinChoo 2023-09-01 02:11:51 UTC #38

Love the blurb, seems like a good story and liking the interesting premise - jump straight into the story.
Let's see how it will go along from there.

SereinChoo 2023-09-01 03:09:06 UTC #39

The first chapter was great. Interesting to hook reader to continue reading.
Blurb - The past memories that were like shackles bounding me was lifted up when I found myself somewhere different.
Can remove the word 'up'
The past memories that were like shackles bounding me was lifted when I found myself somewhere different.
political power instead of political power heads
It will make the sentences feel more smooth when reading

MarvinDziamski 2023-09-01 12:42:01 UTC #40

Thanks for the opportunity
here are mine:

abigaillmartin 2023-09-01 12:57:11 UTC #41

Hello, I don’t think I’ve done mine yet. Also the first chapter is in two parts.

SereinChoo 2023-09-04 02:18:39 UTC #42

it's cute how Roy blushes at the first chap - hmm improvement?
Maybe before the story starts, add a chapter of character introductions.
Like a one page thing with frames of the characters iamges and their names.

SereinChoo 2023-09-04 02:22:38 UTC #43

It was very funny to read. That first chap was really funny with all the its hooks.
Great job!

yilee9738 2023-09-04 13:29:42 UTC #44

Alright~

flourish 2023-09-04 15:58:41 UTC #45

Check out "CHAPTER 1" from Miracle Worker on Tapas: https://tapas.io/episode/2900697

SereinChoo 2023-09-05 01:35:22 UTC #46

Have you liked and sub my novel?

SereinChoo 2023-09-05 01:35:37 UTC #47

Hello, have you sub and liked my novel?

yilee9738 2023-09-06 15:16:20 UTC #48

Yes I have and am still waiting

SereinChoo 2023-09-08 03:59:08 UTC #49

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