This is basically why I stopped frequenting too many "shameless self-promotion!" threads because SHOW ME YOUR GOOD STUFF PLEASE, so this is a great way to counter it! After all, if the hook – and you wanna put that thing right on page one – doesn't catch your eye, chances are that the rest isn't your cup of tea, either. ^^
I've been meaning to drop something here for weeks, but oh well. xD
A week before the Solstice, my life as I knew it fell apart—and I had only my own ignorance to thank for this painful awakening.
The summer was still young, but already its oppressing heat crept into the castle‘s walls. Cooped up between metal plates and wires, I could scarcely tell the difference between my own sweat and the cooling liquid of the cannon prototype before me. And yet, I could not allow myself a rest. My schedule was rigid, to say the least. The Guard Captain herself had tasked me with fortifying the castle's defenses until the winter season, and Amélie ly Cross was no woman to be denied her demands. Not only did she trample enemies of the city into the ground, but she was just as relentless when it came to her allies: you either enjoyed her trust—or had to undergo her scrutinizing gaze and trials until you won it. I had seen many an inept footman of hers vanish from the Guards’ ranks for minor missteps.
I had sworn that I would not be one of them.
I was never a big fan of 1st person narrator myself, but seeing as this was originally intended to be the MC's memoir of sorts, it just kinda happened. xD 1st person narrator doesn't have to be YA; they can be a disillusioned mid-thirties man with an ego too big for their own good, as well.
I'll definitely come back to scan y'all's beginning paragraphs later! (We're moving in two weeks aaaah;; )