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Nov 2017

This reminds me of a thing I read the other day about a family with an outdoor-indoor cat. Apparently their neighbor had a problem with the cat, so they took it 10 miles away from it's home, and dumped it. The family is pressing charges, and still looking for their lost pet.
We have a few cats like that, but we only let them in the yard. Not because of cars... mostly, but cuz people can be so awful for no reason. Hell, every Halloween black cats turn up mutilated around neighborhoods in our city as a holiday "tradition". Plus I live in a desert, and the last thing I want is a coyote, or javelina to get one of my cats.

I always had indoor/outdoor cats. They like to lay in the yard and eat field mice.

The current cat I have now I only have because he just showed up one day and inserted himself into our family between the other cats.

He's a lazy shit who became afraid of the outdoors now tho.

oh thats a bloody dick move.

yeah, id definitely keep a cat in on halloween regardless. i just cant respect the concept of just keeping a cat in for its safety, regardless of how it feels about it. its not fair! quality of life > length of life, imo.

Well, if they get past the yard there's not much that can be done. Personally I don't think being torn apart by a larger predator after desperately trying to escape would equal a "quality life", but different strokes for different folks. I've personally seen, and buried, too many pets who've been killed in their youth to be completely "who cares what happens."

Unless that cat was previously a stray, of course. Since they're not completely ignorant to the dangers of the outside, and know how to defend themselves. I'd still be wary if I didn't see the cat within a few weeks, though.

ahh yeah, im probably biased bc my cat was previously a stray, and he was very competent outdoors. that didnt stop us from losing our shit if he didnt come back for his second breakfast though.

i just dont think its fair to condemn the concept of outdoor cats across the board

Then again, put that many cats in an apartment building and they're no better than vermin.

I had a crazy cat lady for an aunt. Every piece of furniture she had was slowly dissolving under an onslaught of cat piss.

I don't disagree, it is awful to force your cats to stay if they don't want to (I had to keep my cats in my room for a while cuz my mom's husband was an abusive ass who went after the cats if they were out. I felt pretty shitty for having to do that), but I feel it depends on the outdoor cat. Most of my indoor-outdoor cats were born, and raised indoors. They were never taught basic survival skills, hell, when they're lucky enough to catch prey they don't even know to eat it. If any of them got past the yard they'd most likely get scared, get lost, then die from something. It'd be like letting a toddler run loose in the wilderness by themselves.

So yeah, to me outdoor cats who were born outdoor cats are fine, but a cat born indoors, with no survival experience is less fine.

Anyways, I don't want to keep derailing the thread, so I'll be ending my end of the conversation.

this is none of my business dear god

Talk to her. Try to explain to her her how certain behaviors have been making you feel. If she's truly a "pretty sweet person", she'll most likely strive to do better moving forward. If not, well..
I know this sounds harsh, but sometimes we have to cut ties when relationship change. You have your whole life ahead of you to meet new people and form new bonds :slight_smile:
See if you can get her to understand you; then make an informed decision. I'm sorry to hear this is happening to you!

Man, I've tried this but it always ends up with me telling her how I feel and then the argument gets turned into a huge insult fight. And the next day we act as if nothing happened and we're friends again... But maybe next time I'll take a different approach :slight_smile: thanks for the advice!

Wow, that's rough. I think maybe the whole "pretend nothing happened" thing might not be the best approach, since it's basically supressing any negative/hurtful feelings that need to be addressed and resolved. I hope it all works out for you girl :slight_smile:

#but let me not turn this into a group therapy thread, pfft :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

Maybe it's time to stage an intervention.

"Missy, we all gathered here today to tell you that you've been acting like a complete flunderbudgett."

  1. Help me I'm swedish so when that one is played I ACTUALLY KNOW THE BLOODY LYRICS SO IT'S STUCK EVEN HARDER
  2. I am fucking pissy because I can kinda sing... until I approach a microphone. Then I sound like a half dead bird on the road screaming for sweet mercy.
    I USED TO BE A NEAT SOPRANO DAMMIT IT SHOULDN'T BE THAT HARD TO BECOME A GOOD BARITONE

Outdoor cats are illegal in the area I live... this was not a thing we realized was a thing since all neighbourhoods we lived in before it was both perfectly fine and normal.

Every time one of our cats got out we would get a 500$ fine. We had a neighbour that really fucking hated us, so one of the many things he would complain to the city for or get us fined for was if they spotted our cats out of the house, and honestly, we got warnings and fines so friggen often it was pretty clear that he was practically stalking our house to see if they got out.

One of our outdoor cats ended up getting poisoned and dying. The other one was just didn't come back one day. Another neighbour asked us what happened to our cats and was pretty disappointed to learn that they had passed. Apparently they kept the mice out of her shed (we're right across the street from a small forest area, so there are LOTS of small animals that live there, it's why the cats liked going out so much) and since they disappeared her shed and a lot of the garages in the neighbourhood have been infested with them. You honestly can't go on a walk without seeing mice run across the sidewalk or around you. (remember it's a no outdoor cats policy neighbourhood, so we were likely not the only ones that got fines if our cats got out)

Personally, I think outdoor cats are less unsightly then seeing mice everywhere and in everything but I guess that's just my opinion.