Hi there, my apologies that I fell off the bandwagon with this thread! Did I ever complete your review? If I did not and you are still interested in receiving a review after all this time, please drop your book link here! I'll be sure to give a detailed and helpful review you deserve because I do not like leaving things incomplete! 
Hi there, my apologies that I fell off the bandwagon with this thread! Did I ever complete your review? If I did not and you are still interested in receiving a review after all this time, please drop your book link here! I'll be sure to give a detailed and helpful review you deserve because I do not like leaving things incomplete!
Hey! My apologies that I fell off the bandwagon with this thread! Did I ever complete your review? If I did not and you are still interested in receiving a review after all this time, please drop your book link here! I'll be sure to give a detailed and helpful review you deserve because I do not like leaving things incomplete!
Hii my apologies that I fell off the bandwagon with this thread! Did I ever complete your review? If I did not and you are still interested in receiving a review after all this time, please drop your book link here! I'll be sure to give a detailed and helpful review you deserve because I do not like leaving things incomplete!
My apologies that I fell off the bandwagon with this thread! Did I ever complete your review? If I did not and you are still interested in receiving a review after all this time, please drop your book link here! I'll be sure to give a detailed and helpful review you deserve because I do not like leaving things incomplete!
Apologies that I fell off the bandwagon with this thread! Did I ever complete your review? If I did not and you are still interested in receiving a review after all this time, please drop your book link here! I'll be sure to give a detailed and helpful review you deserve because I do not like leaving things incomplete!
Did I ever complete your review? If I did not and you are still interested in receiving a review after all this time, please drop your book link here! I'll be sure to give a detailed and helpful review you deserve because I do not like leaving things incomplete!
THANK YOU. I appreciated your detailed review and I would like to apologize if I fell off the bandwagon with this thread! Did I ever complete your review? If I did not and you are still interested in receiving a review after all this time, please drop your book link here! I'll be sure to give a detailed and helpful review you deserve because I do not like leaving things incomplete!
I am currently doing the same task as well. Well, I'll drop my work in here.
Assume this was the post from year ago, I bet you'd complete your book?
Mine if you drop it here again?
Here's mine:
Okay. So I've just finished reading the first few chapters of your book. Here are some of my thoughts and impressions as I was reading.
FIRST THOUGHTS AND IMPRESSIONS:
Really ominous beginning, I get the feeling something bad happened but I don't know what yet. Now, I'm curious to find out....
Hmm why are they all huddled by a fire? Are they not able to make shelters for themselves?
What is this 'End' everyone is talking about? Curious...
Do they have to be outside if that's cold and foggy? Why is it so foggy in the first place? Some nuclear event? Many, many, questions!
Man, it seem like they are all sad, depressed, and have nothing to do but to struggle to survive.
Man it sounds like they are living in a rough world
I wouldn't be able to survive in a world like that.
The details on the characters are pretty on point, I can feel person has a distinct look and personality.
I feel like I can feel the dirt and grime off the pages, that's how apocalyptic the setting feels right now.
This kinda reminds me of the tv show The Leftovers, especially when Ruby talks about leaving her bf and feeling like there was no point to it. One of the characters in the tv show the Leftovers has an affair and they lose that person after a similar cataclysmic event and they feel like there was no point to it, there was a kind of of grief from it too like Ruby.
OVERALL THOUGHTS FOR EVERYTHING:
The writing descriptions for each character is perfect. It really gives you an idea of what each character look like. They all had a distinct look and sound in my mind while I reading. The nicknames were also perfect, I feel like it really showed just how damaging this 'End' was on the minds of the survivors. The line you said were they said their old names were no longer of use was just PERFECT. It was the chef's kiss and I really liked that line because it added to the dark, grim, rough imagery in my mind.
As a reader I really got the feel that whatever 'The End' was, it truly changed the world and in the people in it forever. Another thing I liked, was the way you use charged words with sharp imagery like 'they huddled like maggots' and 'a skeleton of what was' really added to that dark uncomfortable end of the world imagery you were going for. I also liked how you could see each of the characters had unique personalities and yet you could still tell their minds and hearts were damaged. I liked too how some of them still had such a chaotic humor which helped to lighten the load of the heaviness in each chapter, so I appreciated that.
With that being said, I would say the biggest thing I noticed was that there wasn't much details on the setting. You described them sitting around a makeshift bonfire but I could not really picture where they were. Are they in open field? Are they in an abandoned lot? Or where they next to some area where there was broken debris? I know you mentioned the metal pipes, but I was little lost on where those were coming from. I would also mention the chapters are short, which made it a little hard to ground myself on what was happening because the next chapter either continues from before or just jumps scenes and that also made it a little hard to recognize the setting.
Another thing I would mention is that some of the formating of the chapters are little far too spaced out which makes it a little hard to read at times. I also noticed some grammatical errors here and there along with some weird sentence structure. I would also say, as much as I was starting to enjoy the characters in 'The Group' I also noticed there were a lot of character names for the first chapters and it was just a little bit hard to keep up with so many characters and then to introduce another character just made me a little confused is all.
So, final thoughts? Well, while apocalyptic stories aren't really my kind of tea, I think this story already has so much potential! You do an awesome job of using emotional charged words and descriptive imagery to create a world that is unique and dark, and with some polishing of the setting, some of the grammar, and the character introductions it will be even better.
Hey there! I would love to do a feedback for feedback! And no, I actually haven't completed my work yet, since my main focus was on the other book I'm actually almost done with, and here's my book Tempest and Temptation. I'll be checking out yours today!
@NotBeatrix
There is one thing that caught me dumbfounded. I wasn't sure why but I'm pretty sure that you have less exposure than any other did in this community.
Your English is superb! I am not saying this to please you, but I'll be sincere here. I've read quite an amount of other author creations here. Yours? It was pure English, which I could only read in a 'real' published book in the bookstore. The metaphor is excellent! The synonym usage was hit on the spot.
But why? Why your subs and view doesn't match the quality of your creation?
Many grandmasters made their introduction with mystery—an attempt to lure their readers into diving into their world with much mystery and unsolvable questions. We keep seeking for whatever happens to the main protagonist. We want to know what exactly happens. Synonyms and clarity played a significant role in making it happen.
e.g., To any onlooker, she might've appeared like a sprinting specter of the night. | She was in flight, melding into the night
So, she ran. She had to run. She had to. - It doesn't seem like repetitive wording. Instead, it displayed how desperate she was from becoming prey of the night.
Conclusion; I guess it is time for you to promote your book more often. You deserve it.
Nicely done!! I think I've used some errors or mistakes in phrasing my sentences, even for my comment here. Compared to mine, I guess I still have a long way to go before reaching a feat like yours.
P/S: Sorry for late review, had to busy with reality awhile.
