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Oct 2020

Q: Why was the math book depressed?

A: It was full of problems.

Ba-dum-tssssss!

I'll see myself out.

My elementary school was right next to a cemetery: when my dad would take me to school or pick me up, he always said the same thing.

Why is the cemetery so big?

:skull:People are just dying to get in. :skull: :coffin:
Ba-dum tsss

Q: Why do mermaids wear sea-shells?

A: Because B-shells are too small and D-shells are too big.

worst dad joke achievement unlocked :trophy:

Two peanuts were walking down a street. One was a salted.

Im a Dad so I can give you my best one.

I went to a zoo the other day and all they had there was a dog.

...It was a shih tzu.

Not from my dad, but I want to write this one:

What colour are windows?
Blue, because it always crash.

Explanation:

BSOD

My Dad would have been 70 today. :slight_smile:

His favorite joke of all time, I think, the one that made him laugh the loudest, was this one:

voice on phone "911, do you need fire, police or ambulance."
Merl: "I-I needa ambulance! I done shot my friend inna leg while we's out huntin' an' I think he's dead!"
voice on phone "Alright, look sir, don't panic, okay? What's your name?"
Merl: "I go by Merl!"
voice on phone "Okay, and your friend's name?"
Merl: "He goes by Pete..."
voice on phone "Good. Alright Merl, first thing we need to do is make sure Pete's really dead..."
Merl: "Hang on a tick..."

gunshot

Merl: "K, now whut?"

:smiley: :smiley: ::smiley:

Didn't matter where we were, we would bust up laughing...

Happy B-day, Dad... :heart:

Q: How come the little kid couldn't get into the movie theater to see the pirate movie?

A: It was rated Arrrr!