Being mortal sucks

[vworksart]

It's been eating at me for a while. This nagging voice telling me that I'm not working hard enough or I'm not completing pages fast enough. Every week I try to release 3 to 5 pages of new content but i keep feeling as if it's not enough. This has been bugging me for a while but i kind of pushed it to the back of my mind.. Until today that is! I got a comment over on Webtoon saying that my releases are too short. They "acknowledged" that it takes hard work to crank them out but still felt it was unbearable to wait.

Now as I've said, I've felt this for a while and I'm not throwing shade at the comment but it did make all that resurface and I feel really crap about it. I'm mad at myself for not being able to put more work in. I try.. but my body constantly fights me on it when i try to go beyond. Months ago I started a routine of getting up at 5 to work till 9, then I'd go to my day job until 530 and then I try to work some more when I get home but either the quality suffers so it takes 2x as long because I'm constantly erasing and starting over, or I just get frustrated and put it off till the next morning.

I'm... not sure what else I can do honestly, I feel like I'm slowly losing it lol! I'm not sure how to maintain that high level 11 state so I can continue working at a fast pace and not have the quality tank. I mean, I try to use Saturday as a rest day but I'm contemplating giving that up now. Idk. I know I'm letting a comment send me into a spiral and ya know, logically this should be nothing to me... it should be nothing haha.. ahem

I'm going to wrap here before I start typing out facial expressions.. sorry for the rant / word vomit.

I am curious if any of you deal with something similar? How do you cope? Or am I just crazy and overreacting lol?

Thanks.

[irene_addler]

I think you sound exhausted and very stressed. I work a full-time job alongside working on my comic as well, so I get the struggle. Consider taking a break and coming back when you're rested and feel more centered! There's no sense in working yourself to the bone. We work to live, not live to work and there is absolutely no shame in taking a much-needed break. Don't listen to the words saying you're not good enough. What you do is enough because you've done it. You do what you can do without losing your mind. It's okay to do only what you can do. Not everyone is going to like that, and that's alright! You can't please everyone!

[Kelheor]

You are clearly exausted, my friend. It is impossible to jump over the roof and the readers just don't understand it. Like at all, they have no idea how hard it is and most of them don't care. It would never be enough for them, probably even if you make 50 panels per update. Our updates are short too (some are even around 8 panels), so I know the feeling
I see you post every week, how about making an update one every two week, but with more panels? At least that what we do now (we actually asked the readers and most wrote they prefer longer updates, even if not every week). They looove to scroll it on Webtoons.

[Jenny-Toons]

I've gotten to the point where I immediately gloss over comments that go "when's the next update" or "how was it so short?". I might even make a point of answering all comments except those. I don't even answer them.

But I will answer them on a friend's comic, especially if said friend has told people 'hey, I'm talking a break because my wrist hurts' or 'I'm having a baby pretty soon'. As far as I've seen, most people who see that comment "hey, take your time" or "make sure you rest up well". So the "readers don't know how hard it is" or "readers are young kids" reasons can only go so far before I call bs. Like, if you need to take a break because you've got something going on or you know you're working hard, and a reader's first reaction is "when's the next update", that's just a "them problem".

So I'd say it's best to ignore comments like that. Maybe they don't know how entitled they sound, or maybe they do. But if the majority of your readers can see you're working hard, understand how hard it is, and support you when you take a break, those are the ones you pay more attention to.

[yansusu]

I'm not a comic artist but a novelist so I am able to update some projects daily - some even with two chapters a day - and I still got comments like that, asking me to "update at least five chapters a day" and then very reluctantly reducing their wishes to me just updating "at least four chapters a day" after I told them that I'm studying and working and only writing at the side.

The sad truth is: Whether it's novels or comics for some readers, it will never be enough. I'm pretty sure that if I was somehow able to update five chapters of a project a day, I'd still have the very same readers ask me for ten.
Some people are just like that. And it's never a good idea to give in. Because they will likely not stop demanding you to work more while your health will detoriate and sometime in the future you might be sitting there unable to write/draw at all in the worst case.

I've been there. I can't type more than 1k words a day anymore even after I've rested several months. (Luckiyl found a work-around but that's hard as an artist, isn't it?) Now, I haven't done that much writing because of those comments but because my own expectations of myself were that high. I wanted to write that much so it's my own fault. Was it worth it? Maybe. It certainly wouldn't have been if I just did it to make a random commenter happy though. And I've learned with time that I do need to take more breaks if I don't want to ruin the rest of my health as well.

So, honestly, if you feel that you can't keep the schedule you have right now, then maybe try slightly reducing it. It doesn't even have to be much but just one page less might already do you good while it's not that much of a reduction for your readers. Even if some do complain at first, I think they'll get used to it after a while.

[xabelmind]

Honey, those are the words of a workaholic

You're just walking towards burn out.

If you feel unfocused and disoriented, like night comes and you don't know what you've been doing all day; if you feel like you're screwing your health to work more and still get nothing, but a screwed health; if guilt preys on you the moment you rest...

I advise you to start a bullet journal.

Workaholics need to face their effort with writen facts. Let your brain see the real effort you're doing, on the paper.

You have to experiment till find the things you wanna keep track of that help you the best, but here is mine to give you an idea of what activities I want my brain to value, instead of just work 24/7. If I cross half or more of this list, I made the most of the day:

• Cleaning/Shopping
• Exercise
• Drink water
• See the Sun
• Work on my thesis
• Work on audiovisual stuff
• Play the piano
• Write
• Translate
• Draw my comic
• Draw (in general)
• Post something
• Read
• Sleep
• Rest
• Take my meds
• Meditate
• Learn something

It's just the "do, document, take care of yourself, interact and enjoy" applied to my needs at this moment. But it's impossible cover those five points every freaking day, you would get ill!

The point is visualize your real effort, set reasonable goals (like try to cover half the list), and be aware if it's been too long since you've done one of the activities.

We're more productive when we have proper rest and our health is cared for, including have days off for each activity we do daily.

Right now I'm experimenting with it, instead of having a day off of everything (which I'm unable to do right by, me and my restless butt), have days off of certain activities. For example: Be offline on Tuesdays and Fridays, or no drawing on Sundays. So I can do all the other stuff, but not that activity.

By now my health likes the changes and my brain enjoys variety It let's me put a weekly number of days off according to the activity, for example two to three days offline because interaction is the biggest strain to my energy. And I found that I became more productive online now that I have days off

Anyway, experiment with it, help your brain stop, focus and enjoy the deeply satisfying moment of cross squares in your list and be able to keep track of your level of activity.

[vworksart]

I probably should take a break. It's just hard for me because I have this fear of losing what readers I have and if I let up at all, it won't go well. I'm probably blowing things out of proportion a bit but idk, I can't help it.
Thank you. I will try to not stress on it and keep doing what I can.

[OttoGruenwald]

[vworksart]

I see. Maybe I could do a survey asking what they would prefer. If they prefer 2 weeks that's more content to drop and less work for me doing editing week by week haha!
Thanks for the advice

[vworksart]

You're right, I need to focus more on the positive comments. It just seems so easy to get sucked into the negative at times. I'll do my best to keep the supportive responses in mind. Thanks

[DiegoPalacios]

Rest is an important part of work (i know it`s paradoxical, but it is like this)

Rest is the process of clearing your mind and helping your body to recover. Is the mortal equivalent of the maintenance of a car and getting fuel. So is vital to be able to work on the long term.

Don`t give up on your rest day. This is a vital part of working on your comic (and other aspects of your life). See what work schesdule you can maintain without overwhelming you and what works better for you.

After all, you are the one doing the work here. Take care of yourself!

[Maps]

Man I feel you. I began trying comics right when I first got my iPad about half a year ago. I was creating like, 20 panel chapters but the quality was not great. It hit me one day how unhappy I was with my art (since I’m such a noob) and thought, “screw this... I’m going to erase the chapters I put out and am going to start over with short chapters and more quality that I’m actually happy with.” Especially since I was starting to get used to my iPad.
I’m currently drawing my new panels now and I’m so much happier with the art. And now I also have way more free time since I’m nt overdoing it with the pages.
I explained to my followers that I wasn’t happy with my art since I was still learning and wanted to revamp the chapters I had put out before I got too deep into the comic. I also let them know that I’d be putting out less panels but they’d be of better quality and on a weekly schedule.
So, my advice to you is to keep doing shorter pages with art that you’re proud of. I’d hate for you to be in my boat where one day you realize how unhappy you are with what you’re putting out because your rushing to do too many pages in a short amount of time. And having so much less free time. Your followers can wait a week for your shorter chapters! So many people have this kind of set up, so it’s not like it’s unusual for people to post one or a few pages of quality art a week.

[CodeMonkeyArts]

I'm sorry; I wish I had more to say than "Ignore them" but it's really hard when the comments are only reinforcing what your brain is telling your already. 3 to 5 pages a week is, personally? A lot! You're doing so much and that's on top of your full time job. I think that webcomics and webnovels, especially when it's NOT taking the place of the day day job, should be created because there is a story YOU want to tell, that you feel passionate about.

Once burnout happens, the passion fizzles out and it's not fun anymore.

If there would be little impact to pacing, I would say to lessen the amount you post each week. Maybe just keep it at 3. Making take it to two pages and give yourself a little time for yourself. I admire the ability to wake up at 5 am to work till 9 and honestly I would like to do that myself (at least to work on creating my website), however considering how you have been feeling, you're technically adding 4 hours of work on top of what you do for...work. So take the break.

Slow down, focus on how you feel and how the quality of the work is coming out. Hopefully that will return the satisfaction with your passion. Not your 'work'.

Your passion.

Also one last word:

They don't DESERVE your passion and effort. Fuck 'em.

[rajillustration]

They're reading your comic entirely for free. They don't really deserve anything more. You give them near constant updates, and all they give you is one single number. You're not an art factory, and personally I ignore comments like that (tbh, I don't get many comments on my comic since it's a side project but also I'm very clear on my other socials about my boundaries when it comes to this sort of thing.) The pressure to maintain the same schedule as a manga with multiple people working on it is absolutely insane. I hate that this is the standard people expect of just one person (especially since your comic is inked and colored and very nice, and if I were doing 3-5 updates a week I'd be reserving a lot of that for buffer rather than post.)

Personally I think if enough people are harassing you, you are absolutely allowed to give them a kind, heartfelt PSA and ask them to freakin stop.

Even if this guy's intention was to tell you how much they loved your work, by exaggerating how they feel--you are already doing the work of like 3+ people right now. That person can wait. I have seen creators straight up disappear from certain series from just the influx of anxiety (more common on youtube than it is for comics, I'm sure, but it's still really common. Man, remember Hanna is Not A Boy's Name? RIP forever, good comic)

Your readers read your work for freeee. We love and respect our readers, don't get me wrong, I'm thankful for mine all the time, but if any are like "Hey Rach, can you update more often?" I'm always VERY clear. I'm one person, I'm juggling multiple things, and my stories are not my top priority because they simple don't pay enough.

[Tanako]

yes we all go though it. personally i'm thinking about how i can make it easier on myself. i'm taking on too much and my arm and mental health is suffering from it. from time to time i ask myself if its even worth it. but i do it because i love it. i am inlove with my art. so with that being said, i wont stop however, i WII NOT overwork myself. i will continue to find ways to be better, work less and grow my Patreon. i love my free readers as well. but if i need a break, i take it. thats all.

[samguyjones]

I just looked at your comic. Your output is crazy high. I work full time and do a comic, usually four panels a week, and I find it exhausting. You're drawing so much more, and you're getting really good.

My advice would be to release partial chapters, keeping a steady pace but releasing less at each interval. I think releasing weekly builds good habits, but I don't see how you can have a day job and release this much. If people complain, you could set up a Patreon and say that, if it ever pays as much as your work, you'll draw comics full time.

[LCT_m_a_d]

We're reaching a point in culture where everything is all about making more stuff, and spending less time building and nurturing ideas (and the creators). Its a culture of "produce more material in desperate hopes that we'll find success sooner". Its not sustainable and it's not fullfiling.

Right now your just trying to make a losing situation work. It's not your fault, but what comes next is up to you. You have to ask yourself, what are the consequences of taking more time to produce less things that are more sustainable.

My comic is dedicated to taking your time and prioritizing growth. I choose to work slower on it. Not only has it been fullfilling, it's also been my more successful projects.

[Shanny8]

Def feel this. I've been working on my comic for the past 3 yrs and this year everything has come to a screeching halt- I've been wrestling with arm/wrist/shoulder/back/neck pain on & off since the end of 2016; I took a month off in 2017 so that I could rest up...I took some months off last year after I finished Chapter 2 of my webcomic.

I then went on a suicide spree earlier this year and turnt things up a notch, remastering a comic within a month that I wanted to have ready for a big convention. Pretty much since then, I've been mentally and physically recovering; I wanna work on my comic, but everything still hurts at times(especially at the end of a work day; I work a FT 9-5 job Mon-Fri) and my current surroundings is starting to "demotivate" me.

If my arms can get better, that might help somewhat- I think I might work on pages at my own pace in "hiatus mode" until I can build a buffer. Just dont wanna be under the pressure of creating pages to meet the weekly deadline; I kind of dont have that type of time anymore since things at the RL gig have gotten a little busier.

[sadghost]

Yeah, that's why don't understand how the people featured on premium can do 40+ panels per week. That's crazy. Same with the mangakas on shounen jump making 17+ pages comics every week.

[RiidDisBuk1]

Have you ever thought of doing a story besides your own? I just started reading your story and so far it's good for its simplicity. I feel that you should consider thinking of another story to work on that'll make you into things
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I'm a writer in need of a comic book artist, but don't take these words for anything if you don't want